An Overdose of Love
Worse yet
# FLASHBACK ON PART 21 #
I am so sad and sad about what I have to do now. All will be fatal and destroyed when my pregnancy case will be revealed. I don't want family members to be divided when this problem will be exposed.
"O Allah, will my life be this broken? Do I have no right to be happy anymore? Is my sin too much that You have given such a great trial? I don't think I'm going to be strong and I'm going to be tired of having a very dark day from now on. O Allah, forgive Your servant who always thinks badly of You. There is no intent for this heart to violate Your destiny, but I am just a weak human being who has no more strength to face this kind of ordeal!" I said in my heart while crying hugging the bolster.
I don't know why when pregnancy has been known, now I'm more silent not to talk to anyone including my mother. It seemed that my mother had been anxious over my dramatic change not making any more noise. The trouble I was harboring could not raise my smile and my spirit to live again.
"Can we talk to you for a second, Karin?" say Papa Cokro's permission when I'm having dinner with my family.
"Yes, pa!" weak answer.
"We'll talk in my office" he told me.
"Good, pa."
With a step slowly I followed papa Cokro's footsteps from behind. No one wanted to break down to follow our private remarks, both from Mama Lidya and brother Adrian, which seemed like they knew what Cokro wanted to talk to me about.
"Sit down, Karin!" ask her.
"Yes, pa."
"Mama Lidya told me what you're going through right now. I, as the head of the family, am also very worried about what is happening to you right now. Forgive me if any of the words I want to ask you later offended you" he explained.
"Yes, pa! Please," I answered lowered my head.
"I know you're a jolly boy and always smiling. Can you know what really happened, until you have been moody lately and don't talk much anymore? Are you no longer living in this house? Or did any of Lidya's mom or Adrian's sister hurt you?" ask him a million prejudices.
"No .. no, pa. It's not. I am so happy with you and so happy to have a family that loves and loves me. That's not the problem I'm facing right now, Dad. No member of this family hurt me" I replied lying because I did not want to be honest about the attitude and behavior of Adrian's brother.
"Then why? Couldn't there be a problem if there wasn't a reason?" cecar asked papa Cokro again.
"Sunday is really pa-pa, pa. It's just that Karin wanted to be alone first, because I don't know why I miss my dead parents. Memories for their memories came back to me, so I kept quiet and didn't want to talk to anyone" I lied again.
"Heeh, so that's your problem. All right, then we'll understand and let you be alone for a moment. But remember Karin, don't let this drag on because Mama Lidya and brother Adrian are so worried. Especially every night mama always cried because her favorite daughter did not want to talk to her again. Although you currently miss parents very much, if you can you have to slowly forget that, because your future must be happy can not go back to the past that makes you worse again, because your future must be happy, understand!" Papa Cokro's advice.
"Yes, pa. Got it. Forgive Karin's excessive attitude, maybe Karin is too much to remember the memories of the past," I replied casually.
"Yes, not pa-pa. Now meet your mama, for she is worried about seeing this attitude of yours," he said kindly.
"Yes, pa."
After our four-eye conversation, finally what Papa Cokro told me to do to meet immediately my beloved mother in her room.
Tok .. tok .. tok, Lidya's room door is sluggish.
"Just enter!" answer him in the room.
"Officers, ma. Can I come in?" I said ask permission.
"Oh, you're Karin. Here ... here, come in!" answer him kindly.
"Yes, ma."
"Have you spoken the same way?" ask him curious.
"Yes." Yeah."
"I'm sorry that Karin, who has become an unfilial child to you, has made my mother cry out of worry and disappointment" said I bowed my head, which began to melt the arimata from my cheek.
"Yes, honey. Already ... already, do not need to think again. Maybe you have a hidden problem, so you can't tell us clearly. Mama can understand that, but do not torture us by not wanting to talk to your family," said he rasping who now removes melted tears from my cheeks.
"Yes, ma. Sorry!" I said that I immediately embraced his body.
"Yes, Karin."
Papa Cokro said. Although I have a severe problem, but there are people around me who must be considered and talked to. But my hatred for Adrian's brother has overcome all ego until he forgets everything. Although I had to have a cheerful chat with the family like before, but the heart of anger, hate, resentment still dwells in my heart to hate the next brother Adrian.
********
When I want to sayu-sayu asleep, it is clear that the voice of many people is chatting laughing cheerfully. Because curious, now I also rise from the bed to see who are the guests who make my sleep can not be complacent.
Slowly but surely, now the foot stepped down the stairs and how surprised this self when he saw the group of parents who were the same age as Papa Cokro was visiting, what is strange is why Brother Yona also participated in the group of guests. I could only stand gawking at their carefree laughter.
"Come, Karin. Help mama prepare a drink and some snacks," asked Mama Lidya who is now pulling my hand, so that she would follow him to the kitchen.
"Ee'eeheh, yes ma."
Arriving in the kitchen, we were both busy with the activities requested by Mama Lidya earlier.
"Who the hell are they, ma?" kepo many.
"Oh that guest? Those are the Yona family who want to have an important conversation with us" explained Mama Lidya.
"Ooh," I replied oh ria.
"important? What does that mean, too? Actually what is this, how do you see all Yona's family visiting? Heeh, weird right. How important is it that all his family is brought to this house?" my question is in my heart.
"You brought the drink, Karin. Let mama just bring her snack tray, ok!" ask her.
"Yes, ma."
The hand had now brought a trays filled with ten cups of tea. It seemed that the face of sister Yona Sumringah was smiling like happy, as I began to approach the sofa that had a group of guests.
"Please ... please eat the snack!" said Mama Lidya friendly to guests, when putting a jar of snacks on the table.
"thank you. You shouldn't bother like this, aunt. Let Yona alone should prepare everything, will from now on officially become a aunt's daughter-in-law," said Yona's sister.
"What's? A daughter-in-law? What does this mean?" I asked in my heart with my hands beginning to tremble still busy carrying a tray of drinks.
"Hahahah, that's right besan. There should be no need to bother so, 'Will Yona soon be your daughter-in-law, '" replied the female guest who seemed to be Yona's birth mother.
"Yes .. is true. It's been impatient for Yona to be our daughter-in-law, until the proposal later we will go forward and do it soon," replied Papa Cokro so clear.
Braak ... kroonting, suddenly the tray of drinks released from the hands, until now scattered on the floor because I was shocked when I heard the talk about the application.
"Sarin! What's wrong with you, honey?" mama Lidya asked as I was still shocked.
"Aren't you pa-pa, Karin?" ask brother Adrian who is now coming to me because of worry.
"I'm sorry ..I'm sorry for my carelessness just now. Excuse me!" my reply was to leave with hurried feet up the stairs.
"Hey Karin .. hey Karin, wait .. wait!" call Adrian who is now trying to prevent me.
"I'm sorry for this?" Papa Cokro's voice was unkind to the guests, which was still heard by me who had not far away until the top floor.
Bruuuk, I closed the door violently.
Clamps ... clamps, the door is quickly locked, with the body immediately falling down leaning against the door of the room.
"Hey Karin, what's wrong with you? Open ... open the door, tok. Come on Karin open the door, "forcibly Adrian tried to knock on my door.
His voice begged me not to listen anymore, because the most important thing now is to spill all the tightness in the chest, when knowing that the person who had tasted my body will marry someone else.
"Hhaaaaaah, hik .. hiks!" my tears broke with my head held up.
"Today, what happened to you. Let's open karin .. open," said brother Adrian who sounded already deaf ears.
His voice was so sickening, that it really hurt when it sounded in my ear. The hand had closed the ears tightly with the head still shaking strongly, because it did not want to listen to the voice of the man br*ngs*k.
"Carin ... Karin, open .. open the door! What's wrong with you? Let's answer, don't make your sister worry like this, klek .. klek!" said brother Adrian again who continues to try to persuade, by moving the door knob to open.
"Oh my god, what ... what else is this? Is it not enough for disaster to come upon me? Why is it that the person I love and want to get now belongs to someone else? Aaaaah, pain .. pain really hurt this chest? What is my fault and sin that you have discouraged me like this, brother Adrian? Is it not enough to ruin my life? Plus now you break my heart, what do you hate, until a new problem has been created for me? I hope and always pray that you can remember all those events and take responsibility for all of this, but today what? You have the heart to destroy my dream to have you," a heart murmur that has now hit the chest as a result of feeling tight can not breathe properly anymore
The tears have run into an unstoppable river again, which continues to lament a fate that is increasingly destroyed.