Being a One Day Bride
I'm sorry, Bell.

#POV. Belly

I shook my head as I looked at the dashing figure I last saw. Last time we met, and it was like we didn't know each other. He looks fine, even I can see clearly if his condition without my presence by his side will be normal.

But today, the manly figure is now lying weak and helpless with bandages on the head, a neck that is installed in support, and some medical devices attached to his body.

I thought, after me from him he would be happy and fine. But it turned out that I was wrong, I left her who obviously still needed me.

Ah, what the fuck am I? I need to be self-conscious. The state of the King is not because I left him or because I was not on his side, maybe all this happened to him because it has been outlined by God who governs all human life.

Tess!

The tears fell on my cheeks, I raised my hand and I immediately wiped away the remains of these tears. I don't want anyone to see if I'm crying right now. I also do not want to show how weak and crybaby I am when I am in front of the King.

"Belly," said Aunt Rianti by holding my shoulder.

I immediately turned to him and put on my sip smile to my former mother-in-law. To the extent that I was confused what to call her, Mama or Auntie?

"Bell, thank you for coming to see the King,"

Aunt Rianti again let out her voice, but I could only answer by nodding my head slowly.

"Mama titip Raja for a moment, yes" said Aunt Rianti.

I can't dwell when dealing with Aunt Rianti, different if I'm dealing with Om Darmawan. Maybe, because I thought of her as my own mother and as long as I was married to the King I was always spoiled for her but now it is different because I keep my boundaries, so it feels stiff and wrong. That stiff and misguided feeling arose after I parted with the King.

Moreover, this time around, Aunt Rianti still mentioned herself as my Mama. That's where I can't get tangled anymore.

After Aunt Rianti came out of the room where the King was being treated, I started crying again with a still tight voice.

If I didn't remember this was a hospital, I might have been roaring my voice. I reached for the King's hand which was increasingly taking care of by installing an infusion hose and grasping the pale cold hand tightly.

"You must heal, you are a strong man, King," I said still accompanied by a sense of chest tightness.

The more I tighten this grip on the King's fingers that feel cold, until my tears even more flowing. It was not strong that I supported this head upright even though my body was sitting on a chair, I finally threw my head in the hospital gurney where the King was lying.

I tried to hold back this cry, hoping that there would be no flooding in the King's nursery from my tears.

However, I felt that something touched my head so gently that I had to re-establish my head.

"Be-lly," his hoarse voice was clearly heard in my ears, no matter how long he fell asleep as said by om Darmawan, now I can finally see his eyes have opened.

"Ra-ja," I was surprised and delighted to see her now open her eyes. At that moment, I let go of my hand that had been holding her hand since.

"Ha-us" he said with his voice shrinking.

"Want a drink?"

He no longer answered my question, it worried me. But I could see when he hinted with a blink of his eye.

Soon I took the mineral water that was on the nightstand, and I was confused how to help her drink. I put the water back down and decided to go out and call the doctor.

Not yet I left him, the King again let out his voice. "Don't leave me, Bell."

My footsteps stopped hearing the King's words, but still I had to go out to call the Doctor.

After I managed to call the Doctor to check on the King, I deliberately waited outside the room. I have to keep my boundaries and be self-aware. If I wasn't the King anymore. It would be inappropriate if I kept the King company.

For some reason, I still keep the name of the King in the depths of my heart. I still think about her even though I know that she has hurt my feelings. I can't hate him, seeing him as weak as this I want to always be by his side. But, again my limitations and status with the King were blocking my wiggle room.

Is this how hard it is to love without a clear status? That's what's bothering me right now.

It feels bad, even my heart wants it but logic speaks another.

I closed my eyes with my body still resting on the chair. However, my mind suddenly thought of Alan. I opened my eyes wide.

"Alan," I said softly with her memory.

"Is this what Alan's been feeling all along?"

"Is this how it hurts?"

I exhaled quickly, this is how it felt. It feels like being Alan.

Just a big apology I can say to Alan. Sorry I can't return his feelings. Sorry I could only hurt him.

"Mr Family. The king?" greet the doctor to me.

"Sorry Doc, his family is out. I ..."

"Belly's? Mr. The king is looking for you" concluded the doctor.

I nodded slowly and immediately entered the King's room.

Arriving inside, I just stood a distance away staring at the King, I saw a nurse had removed all the tools that had been attached to the King's body. I am a little relieved, at least the current condition of the King has improved because it no longer needs the equipment, I thought.

The king looked at me from afar, then he smiled. "Bell,"

I swallowed my salivary, I can't stand the vibrations in this heart. If earlier I dared to cry roaring when the King was unconscious, but after the King realized I could not even dwell. I also don't know what I'm going to tell the King. I feel like my mouth is gagu, wanting to talk but unable.

After my footsteps were close to him, exactly now my body has been standing upright beside the gurney. I tried to let out my voice and ventured to greet the King.

"You're awake, thank God," I said, not wanting to say much. Not unwilling, but it still feels heavy after a long time I do not look at him now I have to face the reality if the King is right in front of me.

The king showed a heavy smile, I don't know what he thought that his eyes were clear now began to glaze over, without turning to look at me.

"I'm so happy, when I opened my eyes for the first time all I saw was you, Bell."

Serr ...

There was something rustling in my heart when I heard the words spoken by the King. I was confused to respond to him how, until I was made wrong by him.

"Bell," The king grabbed my hand and held it tightly.

"Don't leave me again, stay here. Because without you my life is a mess and a ruin" said the King again in a heavy voice as if something was weighing on him.

I could see the tears dripping down her face, I couldn't watch that until I had to turn my face away and no longer look at her.

"I'm sorry, Bell."

To be continue ....

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