FIRST LOVE DESTINY《 HeZa'S Love Story 》
FLD 02 You're My Destiny

[HEGA POV ]

For 25 years of my age, I lived my life flat, my daily life just revolved around school, campus or office life. Study and work, struggling with books or stacks of office files and documents.

Never once has my heart been shaken by things related to romance. The various kinds of women who approached each other were also never able to arouse the slightest feeling in my heart.

LOVE ?

Maybe I've forgotten what it's like to love someone, ever since the only precious woman in my life left me for good.

The woman I respect and love the most, the woman who brought me into this world. Well, there is only one woman I keep in the deepest corner of my heart, my mother, the single most precious woman in my life.

" Basic polar bear monster, in vain has God given you perfection, handsome face, genius brain and born rich. But in fact your heart is numb, frozen like the north polar ice. I feel sorry for you, God must be sorry for loving all that perfection for you. "

I still remember every time Bara kept cursing at me every time a woman approached me, even blatantly declaring love for me. But what my reaction was that made Bara upset.

I just flinch, with an indifferent attitude and ignore them as if they were transparent figures.

It may be true, Bara said, my heart was frozen. But I don't know why it could be.

I only remember after my mother's death, my heart was like a chunk of ice so cold. Anyone who comes close, they must be ready to feel the cold around me.

Bara and I are like two different sides of the coin.

My teenage best friend, Bara Prasetya, was a womanizer who conquered women's hearts. I don't know how many times he changes women in a month, I'm not even sure if he's dating just one woman at a time ?

I suspect the boy's girlfriend is everywhere. The proof alone, when we were in LA first, every time we went somewhere either for work or just hang out, he said, there is almost always a figure of air that comes and then swaggered spoiled on the casanova that one.

But at least Bara's 'too-friendly' behavior towards women has benefited me a bit. The reason is precisely because of his behavior that turns off the assumption of many people, both on campus and in the work environment, who suspect our sexual orientation, especially me.

Bara is a typical man who can not live without women, even his life is like an explorer of love. It seemed like he could not see the barren wasteland and always looked eager to plow the land and grow crops.

I'm tired of advising her, but that doesn't mean I stop reminding her. It's just that his life is already free makes me sometimes only able to massage my own forehead. Let the boy do what he wants, but he is no longer a child, he knows what is good and what is bad, although more often the path is dragged into a negative current.

As long as I can pull it out, then I will. But if not, then I will let him think his way as a grown man.

Yes indeed that is the nature, as I said earlier, the boy was too 'friendly', in a different sense according to the dictionary of land crocodiles, which is diligent touch.

Back to the story about me.

On the other hand, there is one thing I should be grateful for from the nature of her crocodile breeding on that one.

Yup, if only Bara had no flirtatious habits in women and was famous as a female conqueror, maybe we have been labeled as a gay couple aka homosexual.

Actually I don't care either, anyway all that slanted talk has no effect on me.

But sometimes it makes me question one thing.

What makes my heart so unwilling to fall in love ?

How great is the effect caused by papa's second marriage ?

Is it so hurt that my heart found my own father betraying the love of the woman who bore him a son ?

Although papa's marriage is also not entirely a form of betrayal to the mother. After all, my mother is already in heaven, maybe papa does need a woman figure who can accompany him in his old age.

There are times when I reflect, try to make and accept papa's decision. After all I must learn to make peace with the past, as said the grandfather who always ring in my ear, if I am the only successor of the family.

All the burden of responsibility on behalf of the family will be on my shoulders.

If only the meaning of the successor that grandfather said was only limited to inheriting and developing the family business, then the situation would not be this complicated for me. Because I'm sure taking care of the company is easier to do than taking care of the household.

And again thank God because it seems like God has prepared many stocks of goodness that He will give me. God gave me the main capital so extraordinary, that is my thinking ability which can be said to be above average aka genius. Until sometimes I also shake my head in disbelief with my genius.

But of course it's not all that easy, because in reality, being the successor of the family also means I have to carry on the family lineage.

Which means of course only one, of course,

I GOTTA GET MARRIED.

In other words, getting married is also one of my obligations as the sole successor to the family name.

How to get married if you never fall in love. At least I'm not a category of men who will marry without love, especially because of matchmaking without love.

Marriage with love alone can still run aground and make each other hurt. Marriage without love ?

Instead of being happy and being a field of reward, it might even happen the opposite. It could be that sacred bond instead becomes the entrance to suffering for both parties.

NO !!! For me marriage is one form of worship, where I as a man must take full responsibility for whoever the woman I will marry will be.

If later I marry someone, then I must guarantee the happiness of the woman who will later become my master.

Then how am I supposed to find the mummy that's my missing rib ? If you are interested in women you never.

What if God is tired of giving me all the conveniences ??!

What if the stock of goodness that God has prepared for me is exhausted ?

Am I going to end up with an arranged marriage like most other family successors ? That makes marriage a form of business.

And I don't know why grandpa also seems like a gangster just saw me who never even brought or introduced women to him.

It is precisely even papa who seems to intensively introduce me to the daughter of his business colleagues, in various ways that long bored me.

Naturally, papa was so, because when I was my age, papa already had a 4-year-old son, namely me.

Well, maybe as a father, papa feels anxious to see his son who at the age of 25 years as if there is no desire to marry or at least date women.

And I know for a fact that grandfather also knew about it, because I realized that grandfather always put some bodyguards around me.

But never once did my grandfather interfere in my personal affairs, especially for matters of companion life, unlike what papa did.

So I still enjoy my solitude, no lack of my life, success in business that brings me to the top of the throne of the family business empire. And the personal company I built with my own business is also fairly successful.

What else am I looking for ? It seems that marriage is not a goal in my life.

All I have in my head is work and work. The no time for love.

Until one afternoon, I accidentally looked into those eyes, those brownish eyes that were livid. Beautiful eyes that made me almost sink into it, eyes that reminded me of something or maybe someone.

Eyes that felt so familiar, eyes that unconsciously opened the lock of my heart that had been tightly closed. Eyes that seem to wake me up if there is a vacuum in my heart.

And when I remember everything, those eyes are what attracted me to you 20 years ago. Those eyes are what make me want you.

And those eyes are what make me declare my ownership of you, and it is only you that I make sure will be empress in the palace of love that I will build later when I am able to stand on my own feet.

When I chose you to be mine, it was my first destiny.

And when I have to be apart and away from you, it is also the destiny that God has outlined for me.

Even when everything about you seems erased and disappears from my memory,

It is also a fate line that I have to go through to fight for you.

Until I find you again, that's when our love destiny begins to reconnect.

When there is not a single memory of you, because God has made me love you because of my heart.

So that I choose you again because it is only you who are outlined to perfect my happiness.

Only your name is engraved in my heart and mind,

Not because of who you are or why you should be,

But because only you deserve to occupy the position of Queen in my life.

My imperfect life is like a cracked ceramic urn missing one of its most important pieces.

And you are present as pieces that complete and perfect my heart and my life.

You are my first love,

you are also the one who will be my true and final love.

My sweet little girl, my little wife, I love you

In the past. . .

Now. . .

And forever. . .

And I will do everything to make you happy.

My little wife, Moza Artana Saint

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