Half the Fallen Angels
Episode 4: Start Accepting Yourself

"I've seen too many dead plants along the way. If I remember, I used to be just like you, Luna, when I first saw dead plants in a city park. The small forest just now and the field of the Dandelion Flower earlier, was the first time I saw a living plant after so many days.", continued Devan.

"Haa?. Devan, your words I don't understand. It's the road I walked along when I came, you know. Then after the funeral, I played in the flower fields for a long time, maybe an hour. Then, now that I'm going down this road again, you know it's all yellowing.it's weird right?" said Luna with a astonished face.

Devan was silent for a moment. He thought of the word Luna.

"What was it that when you came, all these plants were alive, Luna?"

Luna nodded strongly.

They both walked back. Along the way Luna threw her gaze around, now her sad face mixed with anxiety, while Devan just looked forward.

"Can't it be?" said Luna worriedly. "do you know something, Devan?"

"I also don't understand what's going on, Luna" said Devan flatly. He no longer thinks about what happened.

"We're going through Gardum Village. What if I asked someone there?"

"alright. We'll ask the people."

"You'll ask."

"Why?"

"The villagers can't see me."

"Oooh, because you're a fairy?"

Luna nodded, "Mm."

("It turns out you are very deep into your role.", Devan said in his heart.)

After that conversation, they walked over without speaking at all.

A few moments have passed. From far away they both could already see the entrance gate of the village. After their distance from the village was close enough, Luna realized something strange.

"Devan.", Luna looked at Devan.

"Why are the surrounding villages so quiet, Luna. Do the villagers all work inside the village?"

"I was just about to say that."

Luna then walked while bowing her head, while bringing herself closer to Devan's side. The shoulders of the two almost touched.

Devan realizes Luna is a bit scared. He then answered his own question, trying to dilute Luna's fear.

"Yep, it seems like the residents are all working inside the village, or maybe they are in a meeting, talking about the agricultural problems they are facing. Did you see Luna, the rice fields we passed?, all dead."

"Md. But it was fitting that I came on it was still fine", said Luna who kept walking while bowing her head.

"Yes. Something must have happened."

They entered the village gate, then walked on the ground which was quite wide. On each side were dried bamboo trees. The road turned a little. Then after they turn, then they can see the dense settlement of villagers.

However, their steps came to a halt at the corner of that road turn. From where they stood, there was no activity in the village. Except for the view of the villagers lying on the streets, as well as the livestock animals that were lying in between.

Luna's breath is unstable. His mouth was open, his eyes were blinking many times. He hugged the flowers he was carrying very tightly. Face frightened. As for Devan, he was calm, as if he had expected that this would happen.

Devan continued his steps, only a few steps, he turned his head towards Luna who was still motionless in her place.

"Luna?."

Luna still did not move in place. He just shook his head to Devan and took a step back.

"It's okay. There I am", said Devan.

Luna tried to win her over. Then it slowly moved from where it stood to Devan's side. He stepped slowly, and Devan adjusted his steps.

"Devan, What happened to the villagers?", Luna looked at Devan.

"I don't know. You said the people in the village were busy working?", said Devan, his eyes straight ahead.

Luna then moved in front of Devan. Devan's steps stopped, his gaze turned to Luna.

"I'm not lying!".", Luna stopped talking for a moment. His breathing was unstable. "Truly I was through here, the villagers are all still fine" Luna reassured Devan.

"Yes. I didn't say you were lying either. It is precisely with your words that everything makes sense, Luna.", said Devan as he looked at Luna.

Luna just stared at Devan. Both his eyebrows are pucker. Devan who suspected Luna still did not understand continued his words.

"Look at those guys, Luna. The woman who was sprawled with a broomstick in her hand, the sand and trash on the ground stood as if they had run out on a broom. He must be sweeping across the ground. There, a young man was lying with two buckets by his side. He wants to bring water from and to a place, the water spill has not even completely dried up on the surface of the soil. And there too, a middle-aged man lay by the door of his house with a straw hat off his head, he wore boots, then there was a hoe by the door of his house. I thought he was going to the field, and he didn't know about the state of the field we just saw" Devan said.

Luna followed every direction Devan looked at. He watched carefully every single thing Devan showed.

"Those people when they die from certain pains, some of them may fall while holding their chest, or their head for example. But we don't see one. They were all lying down, as if asleep in the middle of their work. And it all happened not long ago" Devan explained.

Luna turned back to face Devan. This time he looked at her with a suspicious look.

"Devan. You, I think your attitude is too calm."

"That's because I'm used to this. A few days ago I wasn't this calm. I told you earlier that I've seen a lot of dead people along the way."

Luna also recalled the conversation Devan was referring to.

(".....I've seen lifeless people everywhere I've been. I could hardly stand it, so I took a walk to entertain myself.")

Luna who previously misunderstood Devan's words, now he understood correctly after seeing this phenomenon. A moment later, he suddenly recalled Devan's words the first time they met.

"I remember when we just met you asked me a strange question. You asked me if I was alive or not."

"That's because I've never seen someone alive before, so I didn't expect it."

When I heard that answer. Luna caught something strange. He felt this had something to do with Devan.

"You mean, you lived for 20 years but never saw a human being alive???" Luna asked with suppressed intonation. Both of Luna's eyebrows dropped.

"Actually.", Devan's sentence was restrained, then threw his gaze down the side from the one before looking at Luna. He felt unsure.

Luna walked stomping to Devan with two small steps. "Tell me, everyone!", said Luna in a rather high tone.

"Where might I tell you everything. We are even new to the.", said Devan with the same height tone.

"De...van....!!!", said Luna in a higher tone while looking intently at Devan.

Devan breathed. He decided to give up on Luna's selfishness and began to tell her the important lines he had along the previous journey, from when he woke up in the middle of the city, to where he could get here.

"...that's how I ended up here" Devan ended the story briefly.

After Luna heard the story, she suddenly took a step back. "Everything that happens here, it's because of your arrival, Devan".", Luna's breathing returned irregular.

Devan was rather shocked to hear Luna's words. His heart was piqued, "You mean?", said Devan seriously.

"There's no way you don't understand, Devan. You deny it, or... Did you try to hide it from me?", Luna retreated again with small steps, trying to keep Devan unaware.

However, Devan realizes that Luna is keeping a distance with him. "I'm not denying anything, and I'm not hiding anything."

After that Devan stepped up, trying to reduce the distance with Luna. However, because Luna was too alert she spontaneously retreated with a step and a clear shocked expression. And that makes both of them awkward.

"Am I afraid of that?" said Devan.

"I don't know if you're a good person or a bad person. I don't know what you're hiding from me" said Luna, wary of Devan.

"Did I look like a bad guy all the time I walked with you?. I'm not hiding anything."

Luna momentarily thought of Devan's words and compared them to his memories.

"If you're not hiding anything, that means you're denying it."

"I deny what?"

"Everything that happens here, it's because of your arrival", Luna began to throw endless sentences at Devan.

"You're very good at guessing what happened before when you saw the dead villagers, so there's no way you don't understand. I'm sure you've started to realize it even from the moment you left town. And you're more aware of it when you leave town. Though you see events and clues that repeat themselves in the next places. But you always ignore it. You've always run from your mind, like now you're also willing to deny it, that everything that dies, it's because...."

"I told you I don't deny anything!!!", suddenly Devan snapped, cutting Luna's sentence.

Luna flinched, her face frightened. Seeing Luna react like that made her realize and regret.

Luna then spontaneously turned around intending to run away. But he was not so because he saw the sight of people lying in front of him which was scary for him.

Luna had forgotten her fear of the atmosphere of the village because she focused on Devan. Now he is in a dilemma, he wants to run away from Devan, but he also needs him to pass through the village.

Luna just stood sideways, between Devan, and the villagers were sprawled. Luna lowered her head, holding back her cries from getting out, her hands and feet trembled in fear.

Seeing that, Devan did not have the heart, he turned around. "alright. I was scary. Run, I won't come after you.". After that Devan walked away from Luna.

"Mm.!", the groaning of Luna's cries came out as she watched Devan walk away from her.

Devan stopped his steps, turning to Luna when he heard her cries. He saw Luna looking at him with a sad face, her eyes glistened, her lips bent closed sign she was still trying to hold back her tears.

Devan is becoming more unbearable. Devan catches Luna's wish that Devan does not want to leave her. Then he walked two steps, then bowed half his body facing Luna.

"I'm sorry, Luna. I'm talking rudely to you."

("I'm making a girl scared instead.", Devan regrets in heart)

"A..I didn't mean to accuse you, Devan. I just want to help you think", said Luna who was still trying to hold back her tears.

"Md. I get it."

"So please don't leave me, Devan. Here I'm afraid. At least get me through the village."

Devan in his hunchback smiled hearing Luna speak too honestly like that.

"eeeeee. It wasn't that you said you didn't know, was I a good person, or a bad person?", Devan said in a mocking tone as he smiled cynically at Luna.

"A. I have no choice" said Luna in a small tone, she threw away her face and ducked down.

"good. Of course I didn't leave you. I told you in the beginning, that I'm going to take you home" Devan said with a smile.

Luna slowly calmed down. His face was no longer tense as it held back the crying. He rubbed his eyes.

A moment later, Devan recalled Luna's words, and tried to ponder them. It one by one justifies the words of Luna.

"Regarding the conversation, I admit that I did deny it, Luna. Perhaps I was afraid, of the fact that I was as if I were being shunned by life, that I should live alone in this world. Thanks to your words, I was helped. I realized, I had better accept my situation like this, and start walking on the path that was destined for me. Thank you, Luna" said Devan. He began to open his heart, and accept his own situation.

Luna smiled at Devan's words. He started walking towards Devan. But, suddenly ...

"Aaakhh", Devan then groaned in pain while holding his head. He lost his balance and bent his knees.

"Devan!, what's wrong with you?", Luna took off the dandelion flowers she was holding and immediately rushed to Devan.

***