I LOVE YOU (I LOVE YOU NOT)
(Finally) I got married

I told Reza last night a childhood friend who was also my neighbor.  This time I dare not stay alone, especially at night.

" let's ask us to help ustadz Di. Which can indeed help clean the house." he said at the time.

" But I don't know an ustadz who understands things like that,"

" Later I try to find.You don't worry. But if you can tonight don't sleep alone." Reza advised again.

The next day an Ustadz with the help of one of his students came to my house. The young Ustadz asked my permission to go around every corner of the house. Without much speech he advised me to join him in reciting some holy verses of the Quran.

When Ustadz finished Jamaludin gave me some advice. Wejangan are familiar to the ears because such a thing is always reminded by my late Papa during his life.

" Mother Diana. The most powerful way to protect ourselves from magic is to pray and read the Quran. Because magic is closely related to the work of demons who want to plunge humans in error. "

" Ustad. Is anyone trying to send magic to me? I asked as if I couldn't believe it.

I've been trying for years to forget my hatred for my past. It turned out that I had not been able to escape the grudges of the people in my past. The people who were once part of my family turned into mortal enemies who were so desperate to destroy my life.

" If I could know. Who did all this shit? I ask again to be curious

"if Miss Diana wants to know. Pray at midnight. Perform at least 2 rakaat prayers with the intention that when Miss Diana finds out who did it there is no grudge in Ms. Diana. Forgive and seek guidance from Allah Subhanahuwataalla. "

I'm speechless.. Yes I must forget this pain and grudge. It's time for me to start a new life. Opening a new, better sheet. I want my marriage to Mahendra to be fine until death do us part.

After Ustad Jamaludin and his students. My feelings are much better. I tried to calm myself down by reading some of the letters in the Quran. Just by reading the sacred verse my heart feels better.

The next few days there was no more strangeness going on in my house. I began to dare to sleep at home without having to pay someone else to accompany me.

" So Di's. How do you feel now? { so., what do you feel now?) Mahendra asked one time by phone.

" I feel much better" (i feel much better)

" Goors. Thats my Princess" seduced Mahendra into making me smile at myself.

"In, make peace with your past. just release the images and emotions, the grudges and tears, the clings and disagreements of the past that bind our spirit."

(In, make peace with your past.Just let go of the images and emotions, resentments and fears, past attachments and disappointments that bind our souls.)

I just nodded in agreement with Mahendra's words.

Mahendra then expressed his desire to make a pilgrimage to the grave of the late Edi before our wedding. Even the man was willing to give compensation to the family Edi as a symbol of peace.

Of course I welcome Mahendra's good intentions even though I'm not entirely sure Edi's family will welcome our intentions to them.

Today-today

I just finished all the necessary requirements for Me and Mahendra to get married later. We who initially wanted to celebrate the party in Semarang but with many other considerations from the big family finally decided to carry out my wedding in Jakarta City.

The welcome for the arrival of the Mahendra Family was well prepared. To meet the marriage requirements between two people from two countries is quite complicated. But for the sake of our good intentions I'm not a typical person who likes the hassle of trying to make a living.

It is time for Mahendra's arrival. As he promised me that before the event the man wanted to make a pilgrimage to Edi's tomb. Mahendra arrived a few days earlier than the arrival of his family from Sydney and Pakistan.

By driving a car owned by Mas Pugi who was loaned to us - Me and Mahendra directly to the city of cirebon. The journey taken from Soekarno Hatta Airport to cirebon is quite tiring for me. In addition to my physical tired of preparing everything for marriage - actually my heart is still heavy to set foot into the city.

Mahendra drove our car quietly. One hand occasionally holds the head or even my hand that I put beside the gear.

" Don't be sorry In. I always be with you. " (don't worry. I will always be with you)

The journey that covers a distance of more than 300 km must be taken within five hours. I who had not set foot in this city for a long time was a little confused to find a direction towards the house of Edi's parents

I try to remember that path. The expanse of onion plantations that we passed became a benchmark for me that Edi's parents' house was not far from this place.

" It looks like this one is his house, "I said then pointing to a house with ivory yellow paint with a sloping roof on one side and a rumaj yard filled with scattered foliage garbage.

"this one? Are you sure? (this one. Are you sure?)

" yes. I am sure"

Me and Mahendra then got out of the car and walked into the yard

But suddenly I was startled by the voice of someone calling me.

" Tea. Diana. Is this Diana's tea?

A woman who screamed ran up to me.

The young woman is Khalisah. Adoptive sister Edi yanh since childhood has been a stray and also had come with me when we settled in the city of Bandung.

" You??? I almost didn't recognize the figure in front of me

" I Khalisah tea. The late brother of Ak Edi who once lived with teteh. "

" oh khalisah. You are getting pretty deck. "I said praising

" ah can aj. Teteh is also more beautiful. "he replies to praise. " oh yes this is the husband of the teteh? Ask a little doubt.

" to-be husband. "surely I. "introduce this prospective husband. Muhammad Mahendra. "i am proud to introduce Mahendra to Khalisah.

Khalisah extended his hand to greet Mahendra pxa. And Mahendra kindly welcomed Khalisah's hand

" ohya Mamah is at home? I asked then did not want to talk any longer. Because I know Mahendra is very tired today.

" Mamah died last month. While Apih died after a few days of coming to deliver the money for the sale of the house at that time, "

" swing tea has separated safely. I live with ayu tea there? obviously khalisah as his index finger led to a small hut house not far from where we were standing.

"then this house?

" this house has been seized by the bank. "

I was silent to hear the Khalisah. Absolutely not expecting watery is the life of their family after Edi.

I explained all of my conversations to Mahendra. Mahendra just nodded at my explanation.

" tell her we want to meet her family" said Mahendra finally.

" falasah, if I may wish to see your brothers."

" oh yes tea. It just so happens that they are at home. Preparation of Yasinan son ak Deni who just died three days ago"

Once again I was silent, but I did not want to comment much on it any further after hearing the Khalisah's explanation. Without waiting long I asked the Khalisah to take us to see his family.

From the direction of the road I have seen faces that I used to know who are currently staring at us with an unhappy face. Especially after knowing that the guest who visits them is the one they hate.

" Why are you here?

Those cynical words just slid from Ayuni's mouth. So is the welcome here from Erni who immediately stood up as if she did not want my existence.

"I'm sorry if my presence is not your hope. I just want to re-establish my friendship and also want to invite you to my wedding. "

" nte need kadiye maneh. " (no need for you to come here) said Ayuni with words that I think are quite rude in Sundanese.

Deni Edi's youngest brother tried to calm his brothers. This young man who I think is wiser to respond to the feud between me and his brothers long ago.

" I'm sorry about the tea Ayu said. Ohya please sit down tea" welcome him kindly. Contrary to the attitude of his brothers earlier.

After explaining the purpose of our arrival to Deni as a neutral spokesman - I then finally say goodbye. I handed over a brown envelope I had prepared earlier at Mahendra's request. Twenty million rupiah worth of money that we intended to give to Edi's parents I finally gave to Deni.

"Den, here's a little bit of teteh and ak Mahendra for you. Teteh hope that in the future our relationship can be better" I said while handing the envelope to Deni.

Deni welcomed my gift well but not with his sisters who still looked cynical looking at me.

But their reaction was not as sinister as when they saw my arrival for the first time. But still there is no warm welcome like a family that has not met from them for a long time.

"thank you for the tea. Smoga will have a good wedding tea. "

" thank you Den. "

I said goodbye without wanting to extend the conversation. Right now I just want to make peace with my past. Without any hostility.

Me and Mahendra left the place. Before our return to Jakarta, we deliberately took the time to make a pilgrimage to the tomb of Edi and his parents who were buried side by side.

When the day was getting darker and tired had begun to attack - we finally continued the journey back to Jakarta.

There was a sense of relief in my heart after this meeting with Edi's sisters. Although there was no warm welcome but at least I have paved the way to improve the relationship between us.

It is time for the wedding day

The groom's motorcade had already arrived at the event venue. The boisterous voices of the guests sounded happy welcoming their arrival.

"wah. bride lakinya handsome yes. Equivalent to a tall chick big and Indian-faced"

"Overseas is apparently his male candidate."

"Truly a classy man.like watching a bollywood movie only us."

the voices of the guests responded to the presence of Mahendra and his family who walked towards the stage pelaminan specifically intended for the groom. The stage is divided by a white cloth that restricts the position between the groom and his woman. The barrier will be removed after the ijab kabul is completed.

This morning is a kabul ijab event between Me and Mahendra. A guardian, several witnesses from both the bride and an interpreter were seated in their respective seats.

My heart was beating faster just before Mahendra said his wedding vows in front of the witnesses.

"BISMILLAAHIRROHMAANIRRAHIM

ASTAGHFIRULLAAHAL’ADZIIM 3 X

ASY HADU ALLAA ILAAHA

ASYHADU ANNA MUHAMMADARRASUULULLAAH.

MISTER MUHAMMAD MAHENDRA SON OF MISTER MUHAMMAD ANAN KHAN

I MARRY OFF AND I WED OFF MY SISTER TO YOU WITH THE DOWRY 100 GRAMS GOLD 24 CARATS AND 10,000 DOLLQR, CASH" said Darma, who acts as my marriage guardian.

" I accept her marriage and wedding DIANA RAHMA, daughter of Mister MUHAMMAD ZUKRI with the laundry mentioned above in cash" Mahendra replied with her challenge..

" Legitimately? ask the ruler then to both witnesses of the bride and groom who are then replied with the same words from each side.

" Thank God" cried boisterously the invited guests who greeted this event with joy

The white curtain had been removed - Mahendra, led by an escort officer, walked over to be able to sit side by side by my side.

My view cannot be separated from the figure of Mahendra. Truly I hope that man is the last man God has given me as my companion.

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