KINARA (Tresno Soko Kulino)
81 Kinara Hearts

the Pov Kinara

I never thought the way of life that I went through like this was inversely proportional to before my mother died. I used to always feel all right. Since childhood mother, father and brother Revan loved me. I became their most beloved little daughter.

A father who is so loving, mother moreover, all the things I get from him, especially brother Revan who loves me most than himself.

Revan's brother who has been trained in martial arts since childhood, riding horses, shooting, even the special skills of a detective he has, which is why he is so overprotective to me. I used to feel like a queen to her whatever I wanted her to do even when I asked her to teach me how to practice martial arts, shoot and ride horses. at first he objected but in the end he relented and wanted to teach me because I could not see me crying all the time.

Although I already have the provision of self-defense, mother, father and brother Revan always remind me not to be arrogant and always proud. They always taught me to be simple in my every action.

Friendship affairs were sometimes they were too over. so that I did not just choose friends. ever since I entered kindergarten, I was in kindergarten, I already had good friends two of them were still with me until we sat down at High School.they were Cici and Ririn. only they were both good friends of mine who really understood who I was.

Perhaps our inner contact has been so close since we first met in kindergarten.from then on whatever we did had to be done together. until the affairs of clothing we must the same sometimes make our parents so boisterous when choosing clothes.

It is not uncommon for us to make arrangements to go shopping with parents. Fortunately, both of our parents are each good friends with each other. wherever we went, our parents never worried.

Even as I made the pilgrimage to the tomb of my twin sister Keisya, they would also join their parents without exception.every year I commemorate Keisya's death day with them, cleaning up his tomb, and cleaning up his grave, sow flowers and recite prayers for him to be calm in nature.

Although I am sad to not be able to remember the face of my twin sister, but I can be happy because there are those who love me so much that the disaster arrived.

When the mother has a heart attack and must be treated in the hospital for months. that was the painful beginning of my life to witness the most precious person in my life having to struggle between life and death with so many laps stuck in his body.

I was devastated but both my best friend and her parents were always there for me. They gave me the spirit to continue living, continuing to smile under any circumstances. a day I will never forget in my entire life.

The day I saw my mother killed by someone I didn't know, and I still remember her until now, the savage man who killed my mother. the man I knew was a half-brother of my mother, the man who was a thorn in my family, who sowed deep hatred in my heart, and I cursed him. what was my mother's fault in him that he could do contempt by eliminating innocent human lives.

At that time I had just returned to English lessons at a private course institution in this city. I planned to accompany my mother afterwards. after tutoring I did not go directly to the hospital but to a bookstore to buy a book package for the national exam preparation Junior High which is several months away.

After I was satisfied I stopped by to shop at the cake shop my mother bought some snacks and pastries of my favorite and mother's. I just arrived at the hospital when it was late at night usually at such an hour there was a shift shift change of nurses in charge of caring for mothers.

When I arrived at the hospital, I did not go straight to the mother but to the special ward of children with cancer first. only after performing Maghrib prayers at the hospital mosque did I head to the room where my mother was treated.

When I was about to hold the doorknob I heard a man say a rude voice to my mother and I did not recognize the voice, and then I opened a little door that was not closed.

...Flashback three years ago...

"Why do you have Amina, I love you first, why would you hurt me by marrying someone else who is nothing compared to me?!"

"I'm sorry, you're still my brother even though we don't have blood relations. You're the son of my father's second wife. Although it's not illegal for you to marry, but it's a matter of the heart, it's a matter of the heart, I didn't love you in the first place and I just thought you were nothing more than a big brother."

"Lying, you lied to Amina, I tried so long to find you when you left, I gave you a job through my mom, did you forget? when you said you wanted to see my dad, I knew the guy you meant was my mom's second husband when I invited you to come to my house that night. did you forget everything huh?"

"Anthony it's not me, it's Amira my twin sister you know, how many times I've told you it's Amira, and Amira's been gone since you lost her. we also did not find the body until now, whether it is still alive or not"

"Well, I never believed your bullshit Amina, I wouldn't believe it, even if you didn't want to admit it but I have something that will make you accept me. do you know she's been with me since you lost her on her third birthday. hahaha. I took it. I took care of her, I took care of her, if I can't have you at least I can have it in my life."

"Don't do it please, don't do it"

"I will never grant your wish to Amina before you accept me, and divorce your bastard husband."

"I would never do. If I couldn't have you, she wouldn't have the right to have you either. take that Amina!!"

"I beg you.aahh..hah.huh.huh" The sound of Amina's breath began to be unstable and Anthony still continued to speak which increasingly made Amina's condition decrease drastically.

When the detector rang and showed a straight line Anthony was so surprised, then he hurried outside from the room before a nurse came.

Anthony came out with a thousand steps without any care anymore, even the figure of Kinara who sat down due to the harshness he opened the hospital door he did not care as long as he could escape immediately from the hospital.

...Flashback....

I was shocked when I heard the loud sound of the heart detector, when I was about to open the door, suddenly someone opened it from the outside and hit me who was standing. lucky I could still lean against the wall and duck.the man ran away in fear, maybe he thought I was a nurse because the clothes I was wearing were white.

Before long came the group of nurses and doctors just as I was about to stand.they went into the mother's room and checked the condition of the mother.

"Innalilahi wa innailaihi rojiun" said one man in a white coat holding a snelli. followed by another saying the same sentence. my vision suddenly darkened and I don't know what happened after that.

Since my mother's death there is no longer any spirit to continue life.all feels empty.nothing else gives me his so soothing banter, no more orders to pray on time. there was no one to rebuke us when me and my two best friends were playing together in the room, no one to prepare my breakfast in the morning, no one else welcomed my return from school. My life was completely empty. but there was one thing I remembered the day before my mother died.he advised me not to hold a grudge against anyone, but there was one thing I remembered, no matter what happens in my life I have to learn to accept it.

Over time I was slowly able to accept the situation, learning to sincerely accept even though at the same time I also lost my spirit in school because of someone who meant something to me. Rangga, he was one of my spirits at school, but he also disappeared suddenly when I also lost my mother.

After three years passed, I began to be able to organize my heart even though the shadow of the jerk man still remained tightly stored in my memory. it's not easy but that's the fact, forgiving is the work of the heart is forgetting the work of the brain.

When I was just entering the odd semester of third grade high school, my father suddenly fell ill and in a short story he asked me to fulfill my mother's will. I had to marry the man my mother had arranged for me.

Refuse??

At first I refused hard, I did not want to get married, there are still many steep roads ahead there that are waiting for me to achieve all the dreams I want to achieve. but on the other hand I can not refuse the wishes of the father, not unwilling just that I have not been able to lose again before being able to fulfill the wishes of the father and the late mother.

Forced??

Well forced I have to accept this marriage, although I also do not know who he was before. I still remember first mother always advised if later I got married should be able to legowo be a woman, so I can be a woman, must be able to accept all the advantages and disadvantages of a husband because that's where my heaven lies in my husband's pleasure.

Brief story of the marriage happened and that's where the beginning of all the problems in my family began to unfold one by one.

Until I was at the lowest point in my life, one by one the peculiarities of my mother's death began to unfold, about my twin brother who was also still alive also my mother's twin sister who also turned out to be alive.

Sick??

I was sick when I learned the fact that Keisya was not dead but kidnapped and sealed for decades by someone who was none other than my mother's half-brother. I was angry because I felt like a fool for fifteen years to visit the tomb, which was not eating my twin sister, and every year I commemorate her death. even those who have the heart to keep this painful reality silent leave me in my foolishness because of their selfishness.

And what hurt me the most was that when I heard that my mother's twin sister was still alive, I felt more and more stupid because I just wanted to accept all their lies, brother Revan, as well as my two in-laws and husband who turned out to know all my family problems.I'm sick of it. I hate it, I really feel useless.

I was not ready and not able to accept this fact.more so when I met Aunt Amira.The shadow of the presence of mother made me even more upset, shock and I didn't know anything else when I saw my mother's duplicate face.

to be continue...🥰🥰🥰🥰