Love That (No) Blind
Part 10-1: Something to Hide (1)

[Sara]

10.10

Today is my schedule for washing blood. Today is also the first time I wash blood in a hospital that has been appointed by Agam. And since 2 days ago, Agam has given him permission to accompany his mother during the process of dialysis today.

Delivered by the driver, Sara left when the day was approaching noon, after she had finished all her work.

Only, at that time he could not say goodbye to Agam. Because Agam has languished in his favorite ‘istana’. But, he has left his message to Mbok Jami.

If you know I went without saying Mas Agam, you must be nagging inexhaustible, Sara's mind.

“Lho, Sara ... How come here?,” exclaimed a surprised mother as soon as she saw Sara peeking out from behind her bedroom door.

Agam is not lying. Everything is the best. Mother even provided a room that contains a mother only for the process of hemodialysis. Unlike the usual where you have to wait from dawn and alternate with other patients where in the end you are always exhausted after that.

“Mother is surprised to?,” Sara's goda while giving a cake that was given yesterday by Ci Linda to Mbak Mina. “So Sara can't look at Mom. Kan Sara ya kangen, Bu.”

“Non this, Mom. Always carry around for children,” protest Mbak Mina on Mother who only answered with her small laugh.

“Yes nothing to, Ma'am. It's for the kids. That part is from Mas Agam, kok,” to Sara. “You make Mom, uh but you can't eat that. So make a few bocil-bocil only, yes.”

And Mbak Mina can no longer fight other than leave her gratitude to Agam.

“Why are you here? How is your Agam? You live alone? Poor, youo.” Mother urged Sara with various questions as soon as her daughter sat down next to her.

“This mom how to? This is Sara who came, who was asked instead Mas Agam.”

The mother smiled shyly at Sara's temptation. “Mas Agam is fine, Ma'am,” Sara continued to calm her mother. She was still holding Mom's hand after she had kissed the back of her hand. It's a habit of meeting or parting ways with Mom every time.

“If it's this hour, Mas Agam is again working, Mom. Until the afternoon. Sara who was left alone with Mbok Jami,” Sara chatted. Little lie. “Eatya same Mas Agam sent here nengokin Ibu, while nganterin cake for Nino same Nisa.”

Lying a little, is okay, right? Just so that everything looks okay.

In fact, it was Sara herself who asked Agam for permission 2 days ago when her husband told her about the new hospital where she would continue her treatment.

“Ya ndak. Manten new ili senengane meppeett. Lha iki kok. (Yes, it's not that. The newlyweds love to hold on. Lha this is really separate),” said Mother defended herself. “Continue, when is dadi anake? (Keep, when is his son?)”

This time, Mina defended Mom. “Know, Non Sara. Not a blazing. Wis mother is not sabaran iku ... (Not sensitive at all. The mother was already impatient ...)”

“Lha Yes, Min. I'm yo wis I can't wait to snack on grandchildren. (I also can't wait to fondle grandchildren),” continued Mother.

Sara smiled, though bitter. Grandson ...

“How mom? OK?,” asked Sara to shift the conversation that had begun to reach out to sensitive topics. Grandson is not the one thing Sara can give to Mom. Especially with a marriage that is not real.

“Oh yes, sayin sama Agam. No need to be the servant of all. There is Mina. Let's be with Mina,” said Mother again.

Sara smiled at him. “Kata Mas Agam, his servant made nemenin Mother. Ms. Mina is only until the afternoon, Ms.”

But, Mother's protests still continue. “Yes but also do not need a hospital as expensive as this. Just ordinary ones. It must be expensive. Just keep your money. Planted for your children.”

And, it continues. Same point. I just don't want to burden Agam. Mother does not want to be more and more a pest in her daughter's small family.

Sara understood what Mother meant. Sara knew I was worried about Agam's condition as a disability. Lack of physical is considered difficult to make a living because of the limitations of work that can be done. Just like Dad. I'm likening Agam to Dad.

“Mother don't worry. I don't know what Mom's daughter-in-law is. His office building is big, Mom. Home too,” chatter Sara boasts Agam in front of Mother without dare to invite Mother to the house of Agam. He's afraid Agam objected. But by telling stories just like that, Sara wishes you could calm down.

But, Mother looked at him very closely. Both of his beads stared straight at the piercing eyes of his own. Like a knife being thrust at him, then with irregular movements continue to twist tore everything in there so that it spills no silence.

“Every Mother sees you, does not know why, I always feel you are hiding something from Mother.”

DEG!

Is that the instinct of a mother? Anything hidden, no matter how clean the trail is left, still cannot hide from what is called Mother's instinct.

“No, Son?”

Mother's question made Sara even more nervous. He no longer dared to look at me. “I-mom said what, anyway? W-Where is Sara hiding something, Mom? What is Sara hiding?”

Luckily, the waiter who had been waiting outside finally came in to tell her that the doctor wanted to meet Sara. Sara breathed a sigh of relief. He's rescued.

“Mom don't think strangely. Anyway the same focus is on Mother's healing. There was nothing Sara was hiding. Well yes, Sara met the doctor first.”

Just giving a kiss on Mom's cheek, Sara just left without waiting for Mom to answer. Carrying a heart that is still attached after beating very fast hearing Mother's speech. Sara paused for a moment to take her breath.

After making sure no one was following her, Sara sat down on one of the benches, calming her heart that had just fallen apart because of Mother. Suppressing guilt so as not to make him confess everything he's been hiding.

But Sara doesn't regret it.

As she looked at all the facilities that Mother got, so did Sara talk to the doctor who said that Mother had been put on the top waiting list, Sara knew she had made the right decision.

I don't know how many times he's thought maybe this was Agam's own plan. The man intentionally gave her permission to see Mom only to tell her that she had done her job. That Sara had no choice but to back off.

And yes, Sara did not intend to retreat again. It's all been happening. The marriage is legal. Retreating now would only make her even more embarrassed in front of Mom. It would be in vain if it were so.

2 Years, Sara. 2 years. It's only been 2 weeks.