Love That (No) Blind
Part 11-1: The Struggler

[Sara]

14.45

“Compress this wear, Non. Let not be swollen,” said Mbok Jami while thrusting ice cubes wrapped in a clean washcloth. Sara accepted it and directly attached it to the left side of her face.

“Akh ..”

Pain. Sara almost cried for it. The pain was felt until the temples of his eyes, as if his eyeballs were going out because of the pain. His view now feels blurry. Sara massaged her glabela part.

Mas Agam's ...

As she mentioned the name Agam in her heart, she recalled Agam's last face before leaving. Panicked and full of fear. Agam who looked very angry was in stark contrast to what he saw at the end. Sara knew Agam didn't do it on purpose.

But, why should you leave? Sara didn't even say anything. Does he think Sara's gonna be upset?

Getting angry? I don't know. Upset, but angry? Maybe little. He was upset that the man just left without saying sorry. Although unintentionally, Agam should have apologized.

“There is only this in the medicine box, Non.”

Mbok Jami is now putting some pain and headache medicine in front of him. Sara looked at him for quite a while with a blank look. The one in his head right now was only the shadow of Agam's panicked face. Why was it always imagined at that time?

Quickly, Sara shook her head, blowing out the contents of her head that had started to break (possibly) due to Agam's punch. Then put on his best smile when talking to Mbok Jami.

“Still yes, Mbok. I'll drink after this.”

Sarah was in the kitchen for a while. He wanted to take the anti-pain medicine, but over time the pain in his head gradually reduced. He has even been strong to help Mbok Jami clean up the broken plates scattered despite always being banned by Mbok Jami. Though it was Sara's way of calming her heart that was still thinking about what had just happened in the dining room.

After she finished helping Mbok Jami, Sara went up to her room to clean up. The pain in his head had gone completely, although the pain in his face was still impending, especially when touched. But the chaos in his heart and also the contents in his head still did not subside. Maybe still shocked by this incident.

Bathing, then preparing to pray maghrib may be able to reduce a little.

And that's what Sara's gonna do after this.

---

19.17

Shower and pray is the best medicine. At least his heart now felt calmer than it had been. Sara could finally take a deep breath, then throw it away slowly. His mind became more organized.

He sees his reflection in the mirror. He moved his body closer, checked his face and confirmed that there were no bruises there.

Small, but not too obvious. It can still be covered with powder.

If you see it can be dangerous ...

As soon as she finished preparing, Sara went down to the dining room.

Sara had just entered the dining room and found Mbok Jami preparing dinner on the table. But, Sara did not see Agam there.

When he came down, he did not see Agam on the back porch. And now, neither in the dining room. Then where is he?

“Mas Agam hasn't come down yet, Mbok?”

Seeing this is very unusual from the custom of Agam. The man usually sits on the back porch every afternoon. Then, Mbok Jami will take him to the dining room once dinner is ready. But, this ...

“Den Agam is still on top, Non. Last hour and a half five, tak ketoki kamare, arep dijak nang terrace, ndak ono sing nyaut. Iki durung checked maneh. (So, at half-five, I went to his room, I wanted to take him to the terrace, nothing was wrong. I have not checked again.)”

“Let me call, Mbok,” said Sara decided to offer herself.

Could it be that he was still angry because it was noon?

Agam and Sara's room is upstairs. As soon as she climbed the stairs, then turned left, the first door she saw, that was Sara's room. If it goes deeper, then Agam's room and his work space are there.

During this time, every time she went upstairs, Sara's trip was only up to her own room. He had never been upstairs to Agam's room. And this is the first time since he's lived in Agam's house.

Tok, tok, tok ...

“Mas ...,” call Sara slowly.

Silent. There's no answer. That's right said Mbok Jami.

Sara tried it again. “Mas ... Dinner is ready.”

Still remain silent.

Is he in his study?

Sara noticed the door that was about 30 meters from the door of Agam's room. That's the computer workspace door. But, no one knew whether Agam was there or not if no one had peeked him inside.

Should I see it?

Slowly Sara put her foot in the door. But just a few steps, Sara heard a groaning from Agam's room.

“Ugh ... Eng ...”

Sara is unsure. He put his ear to the wall of the door.

A DUG! A DUG!

Whatisit? Is that the sound of falling stuff?

Tok, tok, tok ...

“Mas, Mas Agam ..”

The groaning was no ordinary groan. Sounds weird and stifling to the chest. Sara was getting worried.

Sara knocked on the door of Agam's room hard and quickly. And again and again Sarah called Agam. But there's no reply from inside.

HORN, HORN!

The door handles of the room Agam also repeatedly moved violently and quickly. Pushed it hard hoping that the door would open. But free. The door has a password security, as Raka said.

Raka once said, the door to Agam's room is equipped with a password security that only Agam knows the password. This was all because of his excessive fear of everyone, worrying that someone would go inside.

Sara called back to Agam. “Mas, Mas Agam. Is it okay?”

How can it be okay, Sara? His voice clearly sounded he was enduring the pain.

Tok, tok, tok ...

Agam still did not answer anything.

Is it possible that the hearing aid was removed?

Sara was panicking. If so, calling repeatedly is also free. Sara again looked helplessly at the security attached to the door of Agam's room.

“Mbok Jami!”

Sara immediately ran downstairs as soon as she remembered Raka's words.

#

“Mbok Jami will be notified of the master's room password if there is a duty to clean-up.”

#

May Mbok Jami know ...

That's Sara's only hope. He hopes today Agam assigns Mbok Jami to clean his room. Hopefully so ...

“Lho, Den Agam not tell Non Sara?,” asked Mbok Jami as soon as Sara asked.

Also true. Mbok Jami almost never went up if not on Agam's orders. While Sara, she cleaned her own room. Even if Mbok Jami up, be it Agam or Sara, both have their own activities. So, Mbok Jami hardly knew that their rooms were separate.

The brain in Sara's head is forced to work to find the right reason for it.

“Anu, Mbok. I tried to enter it, but I kept getting it wrong, yeah. I may have misplaced it. What's replaced, yes?,” please Sara.

And easily, Sara got it. Soon he ran back up.

With a gasp of breath, Sara entered the password she had just received.

Tit, tit, tit .... THE HORN!

Aye!

Slowly Sara entered Agam's room, then closed the door.

Darkened. Turn off the lights of his room. But free. Sara couldn't find the switch.

The lights are automatically made too.

“Mas ...,” call him slowly.

There's no sound. Where the hell is he?

Sarah's eyes got used to it in the dark. Although it was difficult, but Sara could still see some things faintly.

“Mas Agam ...,” call him once again.

“Aw ..”

Sara accidentally stepped on something. Whatever it is, it's lucky it's not broken glass. Thick and stacked. Like a box or a thick book cover. Sara stepped on the rim.

“Who?! Who's there?!”

Sara was shocked not to play when Agam suddenly shouted like that. Not to mention, Sara had yet to find where Agam was hiding.

“Ugh ..”

The voice again ...

“Mas ... It's me, Sara ..”

Step by step, Sara advanced into Agam's room even deeper. His eyes kept watching the situation around him. He could still see a pretty messy bed on it. But, there was no Agam on it. Sara stepped forward again.

Sara looked at a bookcase made of wood. A partition bookcase placed in the middle of the room. It seemed to be a partition between the spaces in that room. The shelf, which has about 12 compartments (probably more), each contains books and some room decorators. But, in one of the compartments, Sara could see the back of Agam who was behind her.

“Mas Agam ...,” call Sara gently.

Slowly, Sara approached Agam. He saw the man sitting on the floor leaning against his bookshelf. He covered his face with both arms and continued to grip the wheelchair handle beside him while hiding his face. The whimpering he had heard from earlier sounded faint because of the arm covering him.

With her knees on her back, Sara's hands touched Agam's wrists slowly.

Agam immediately gasped in shock with that touch.

“WHO? GO AWAYL! GO!”

Agam pushed Sara hard to make her fall backwards.

“Mas ..”

“GO!!!”

BUGS!

A pretty thick book had just hit Sara's forehead. And a second later, he could already feel something flowing from his forehead. Something liquid with a deep red color.

Sara just wiped it with her cloth. Then back to the corner of the room while looking at Agam who again hid his face with both arms.

Sara could not continue to force herself to approach Agam. But Sara also could not get away from that place leaving Agam in such a condition.

Can't do. He could hurt himself.

With both eyes, Sara saw the figure of a man who had always looked so firm and never looked weak even though his physique was no longer perfect, now the man looked so fragile. It is too fragile to be destroyed instantly when someone crushes it.

Maybe this is what happened 2 years ago.

Even when her forehead was still bleeding, even the second time Agam had injured her, Sara's fear was no longer there. Let alone fear, his frustration now disappeared without a trace. All that remains now is pity and pity.

Look, Sara ... The figure is now like a fighter who collapsed because he was beaten by his opponent many times. Even his chest could not expand just to take a breath.

Sara sighed slowly, calming her heart. But Sara didn't move. He kept looking at Agam from where he was sitting. All night, Sara stays with Agam who may never know that Sara is with him.