My First Love (My Memories Revealed)
CHAPTER 10 | Difficult Options

That morning the playground was quite crowded, Sam daydreamed alone while the children played so happily. Sam was the only man there. Every child who was in the playground went with his mother. Sam closed his eyes and occasionally rubbed his face. He heard everything, Rein da also Meli talks.

As the conversation was going on, Sam was at the door of the room preparing to come out and help Rein. But Sam heard everything, it made him sick. All his efforts to make Rein laugh during this time really felt very futile.

Sam was frustrated, many times he let out a long sigh, trying not to think about the incident but it could not be denied that every word Rein stored in his brain. Sam tried to look good, but it seemed difficult to do, Sam had put on an ice-cold face since this morning on Rein.

Sometimes Sam saw children who were playing cheerfully and smiling at those who had seen Sam, Sam did not want to look moody in front of the children.

“Hati heart playing Mira, Raka. Don't push the impulse later fall” Shouted Sam.

Sam covered his face with both hands. Sam is completely inexhaustible with everything Rein has done to him, For seven years Sam has been thinking that Rein has really fallen in love with him and forgotten the part of his past, but in reality it is not. It all looked fake in Sam's eyes that day. Everything Rein did was fake.

“It's been less of my sacrifice all this time? I think after all this time we've been married, Rein will love me completely. What is less than me?”

That day his mood was really not calm, all he did was daydream while watching children play, everything he went through was very heavy. Sam closed his sheep with both hands while muttering to himself.

“What is less than me? I love her sincerely, can't she see it? what else do I have to do to get Rein to forget Rey and come to me. She shouldn't be like this to her husband.”

Sam who kept putting on a sad face was seen by his son Mira. Mira's a son who loves her father. Mira exits the game area leaving Raka to play alone and immediately runs to meet Sam and immediately hugs Sam.

“Papa, papa why? Mira happy papa sad?”

Mira's smile instantly turned Sam's gloomy face into a smile. Sam held onto Mira's little face with both hands and shook his head.

“I shouldn't show feelings of sadness to Mira, shouldn't I like this” she said inwardly.

“Mira playing again with Raka. Papa wants to go to the bathroom first.”

Sam smiles and tells Mira to return to play while she heads to the bathroom to wash her face. Sam saw his face in the mirror for a while, trying to forget every word Rein said, but could not. Sam felt there was nothing more he could do.

“Should I separate from Rein? I love her so much. I want it completely. Is my wish too selfish for Rein?”

Maybe there were invisible tears on Sam's face, but his heart ached. Sam is very sincere with Rein, Sam is willing to wait for Rein for whatever it is, but if Rein chooses not to really love Sam is it worth everything Sam did for him?

Sam came out of the bathroom to watch the kids play. When it started in the afternoon, Sam called the children to invite them to eat before going home.

“Mira.. Raka, let's eat first before heading home” Sam called out in a pretty loud voice.

Mira and Raka hear Sam straight out of the playground and follow Sam.

They ate together, Sam tried to look like nothing, they joked and laughed together.

...****************...

Me and Meli were having a big fight at home. Knowing I was only pretending to love Sam, Meli was very disappointed in me, I understood that Meli was very worried about me.

“Rein, now what do you want? you want to continue to be shackled with your mass? You are really happy not to be able to escape from the shadow of Rey until now?”

Meli continued and continued to scold me, I did not take out a single word. Many times I covered my face, not knowing how to explain it to Meli, although I explained it there is no way Meli will understand what I have felt so far.

“Mel, until whenever Rey is my first love. And Sam, he's just a mistake Mel. And up to now I'll never be able to love him.”

The atmosphere in the house was very hot at that time, we really had a big fight, I let out what I felt to Meli as hard as possible, I could not lie to my heart anymore, I said, my heart can't turn away from Rey for anything, and Sam can never take Rey's place at any time.

Sam looked towards Meli with a fake smile on his face.

“Meli, can I leave Mira today to stay at your house? Rein and I have to sort this out both”

Meli looked at me then looked at Sam and nodded her head, Meli took her stuff and took Raka and Mira home. Mira cried in fear at that moment, My heart was quite sick to see Mira who was crying in fear like that. After all Mira is my son, my own flesh and blood.

“Mamaa.. Mira wants to be with mama.. don't tell Mira to go mama”.

Mira was crying very loudly, Meli carried Mira and left us both. Mira's voice was heard even though she was out of the house. I held back my tears. How can I handle all this? What am I supposed to do now?

Sam came to me, this time he was very close to me.

“Let's solve this problem both” with a soft voice that's a little desperate.

I looked at Sam and shook my head while crying.

“Nothing to discuss anymore, this is done Sam”

I left Sam but Sam held my hand, I tried to get away from Sam but Sam's hand was too strong, I couldn't get away from him. The more I force the stronger Sam's hand holds me.

“Sam off, my hand hurts”

Sam kept holding my hand, he didn't let go even though he knew I was in pain, I kept trying to get away from him, but Sam pulled my hand which kept me in his arms. This time Sam hugged me like he didn't want to let me go. The more impossible I could escape from him, his heavy and huge body really held me back, there was no more power I was against the power of Sam who was not comparable to me.

“Until any time, I won't let you go. You are mine, forever will be mine”

Sam let go of his embrace and looked at me, that look I had never seen before, such a cold look. The first time I felt it, I was terrified by Sam's look at me.

Sam pulled me into the room by force, and I could no longer fight him, my strength was incomparable to his. Sam opened the door and pushed me into the bed, right now Sam's right on top of me, Sam held my hand and kissed me, Sam's kiss was so wild this time, I couldn't breathe, I tried to avoid kissing her, but I couldn't. I pushed Sam with all my might.

“Sam lepaas” shouted me.

I was mad at Sam, I slapped him and cried, Sam shouldn't have done this to me. It's not playing. But Sam didn't stop, this time Sam held me back with all his might and kissed me back, Sam kissed me so violently, I kicked him with my knee right in his belly so I could avoid Sam. Sam held his stomach in pain with one hand and the other hand managed to catch me.

He pulled me back to my bed and held my body with both hands. I saw her sad face, her tears dripping and falling on my face. She was crying, Sam still kept kissing me, I kept moving to get away from her.

“Can't you shut up for a minute? Do I have to do it any further for you to listen to me?” His shouting. This time his hands were ready to take off my clothes.

I fell silent, and did not fight Sam's strength again. Sam slowly let go of his hands and dropped himself on me.

.

.

.

.

Hi all.. Thank you for reading this novel if you like it can be liked and get advice. Any advice on the origin of building from you is very important.. 😘😘