Renjana Song
Feel Shame

Ranum immediately reapplied his car to the office where he worked. I don't know why this slightly overcast afternoon street seems a little quiet. However, Ranun did not drive his car at full speed. He actually slightly slowed down the pace of his vehicle so that it could linger more enjoying the streets that seem a little calm. He opened his car's glass window so that the air could freely enter and hit his skin. The focus of his eyes was still fixed on the asphalt road that he was going through at this time, but his heart and mind wandered, still ringing clearly about his meeting with Mr. Hermawan at the restaurant earlier.

''Miss Ranum, there is actually something I want to ask you.'' said Mr. Hermawan in a serious tone as soon as they spent the lunch.

Brightly, just hearing the words of Mr. Hermawan like that alone has made the heart and mind of Ranum feel very unsettled and intimidated. Suddenly his heart became claustrophobic, his fingers felt so cold. It is ******-*****himself his fingers to ease his nervousness a little. At that time, to just guess or guess other questions that might come out of the mouth of Mr. Hermawan he did not dare. All that made him feel even more squeezed and did not dare to think about any other things for that second as well.

''Dad wants to ask what?'' ranum replied with a slight stammer after being silent for a while.

''I'm sure you must have guessed and understood the direction of the conversation I will convey to you.'' said Mr. Hermawan as if he could guess the contents of Ranum's head.

Ranum was made to feel increasingly unsettled. Yes, deep in his heart from now on he had expected that the direction of this afternoon's conversation would definitely be directed to there, on a story of his past with Agam, son of Mr. Hermawan.

''Miss Ranum, can you please tell me what really happened between you and my son?'' ask Mr. Hermawan frankly.

The deg!

Ranum breathed heavily. The question from Mr. Hermawan makes Ranum feel increasingly falling into the abyss. He doesn't know what to say. Ranum really felt very nervous. It felt like he just wanted to immediately run as fast as lightning and disappear from that place. But he could not, his legs suddenly became limp as if there were no bones.

''Just tell me the truth, I just want to hear this story directly from you.'' said Mr. Hermawan again because he only saw Ranum who was silent and looked a little pale.

Ranum also began to say with his bead that looked glassy, his tears that felt like spilling at that moment but still he held it and he was still trying to keep smiling at Mr. Hermawan.

''Actually.....'' After re-arranging his breathing, Ranum began to recount the beginning of his meeting with Agam a few years ago.

''So like that.'' said Mr. Hermawan with a nod of his head.

''Yes, sir.'' replied Ranum who felt a little relieved because he had managed to tell the truth happened to Mr. Hermawan, not all that he said to the man who was sitting before him.

''I'm sorry, I didn't mean to lie and deceive your son. I was forced to do that at that time Ranum said with his head bowed.

''It's all right. You also do not need to apologize to me, said Mr. Hermawan.

''Thank you for your understanding.'' replied Ranum briefly.

''Is it true that my son is the biological father of your son?'' ask Mr. Hermawan with a frank style of speech.

The deg! Again Ranum made dead fleas with questions thrown by Mr. Hermawan. Right now he really felt like he was in a sick room that could instantly kill and finish him off at any moment.

''Just calm down, I will not sue and blame you for it.''

''I also will not give you a choice that will certainly be very easy to choose, by giving a check of hundreds of billions of rupiah and then asking you to leave my son. I am not like rich parents who often exist in novels or in soap operas. Isn't it foolish of people who blatantly refuse checks of hundreds of billions just for the sake of maintaining and unwilling to abandon the child of people?'' said Mr. Hermawan with a little chuckle and trying to melt the atmosphere.

Hearing that Ranum felt a little relieved. Because he thought if Mr. Hermawan would not be cruel what he thought all along.

''Forgive me sir, I can't say that Ranum replied politely.

''Ms. Ranum, I would not have taken your son from your life if it was Agam's son who was automatically my grandson as well.'' said Mr. Hermawan.

''I'm only asking you one thing. If Agam really loves you, make him try harder to prove it to you. The child must be taught a proper lesson because it has wasted a woman like you said Mr. Hermawan in a tone that seemed a little upset.

''I mean father?'' tanya Ranum did not understand. He knitted his eyebrows together a sign of not understanding when he heard what Mr. Hermawan said to him.

''Yes, the child must be taught a lesson. It's good all this time he lived freely without being burdened with a sense of responsibility to you and your child. That brat should be taught a lesson.''

''I also apologize to Ranum son for ignoring the life of Ranum son and my grandson. I, as a father and also an adult man, am deeply ashamed and deeply sorry for my son's non-thinning attitude over the years. Nak Ranum, I'm on your side said Mr. Hermawan again by emphasizing his last sentence.

Ranum was increasingly at a loss for his words when he heard and digested everything Mr. Hermawan had told him.

''I also want to thank Ranum son, for letting my grandson come and be in this world, said Mr. Hermawan again sincerely. Which suddenly made Ranum no longer able to stem his tears that escaped from his beautiful eyes.

Ranum could only nod his head and could no longer speak once he heard everything that Mr. Hermawan said.

''I also please keep this meeting secret from anyone, especially from Agam.'' said Mr. Hermawan again.

''Well sir, I understand.'' said Ranum while wiping his tears that fell just like that.