SHAHDU IN THE SENDU
Missed Him
...Part 18's...
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“Iya buk, Alhamdulillah Iza healthy buk”
“Thank God buk, now Iza what is buk?”. Ningsih sighed
“Iza just finished teaching buk, mom want to talk to Iza”?
“Aah do not need to buk, just say my greetings to Iza ya Buk Fatma, say that I miss him a lot”
“Alright buk, I'll convey”
“Jagain Iza ya buk, until later Zain pick him up again”
“Iya buk, may Allah guide their hearts ya buk, show them the best path for them”
“Aamiin allahumma aamiin, hopefully yes buk, we both berTO’a buk”
Fatma looked at her daughter who was tidying up her face and her alphabet,
“Kak.”
“Iya buk”
“Two you deliver salam”
Zareen termangu, Fatma continues “dia says she misses sister”
“Is mom okay buk?”
“Alhamdulillah your in-laws are fine nak”
“Thank God buk”
“And also buk Ningsih ask momuk, in order to keep you well”
Zareen looked at the mother, “Mother is-anyway, without being asked by the same father as mother is sure to take care of Iza and Gema”, Zareen smiled and shook her head
“Keeping his son-in-law so as not to be glimpsed by other men, could be dangerous he said” Fatma said with a laugh
Zareen stood up and tidied up his books that were strewn across his desk.
“Jikapun Iza glanced at other men, or Iza who glanced at men, za can what buk, za can not invite the guy eloped”
“Ha ha ya can not be son, you are the wife of people”
Fatma walked and turned Zareen's body which was still busy with books that were not much.
“Keep taking care of yourself like this, son, take care of your heart, lest he hate son, Allah is all-knowing of the best for his servant”
Zareen hugs Fatma, “Mother do’ is best for sister and Zain”
Tears that flowed back, wet his mother's shoulders, Zareen cried in silence, bitter pain, very difficult wounds heal this left a pain to find his heart. Injuries in marriage
Zain POV's
In my unconscious I let myself hear the beautiful recitation of the verses, a very eloquent reading with a very soothing tartil. This voice, I know this voice very well
Zain woke up then glanced at the clock next to him, at half-time three in the morning. Zain breathed out and rubbed his face with both hands, he got off the bed and walked to the balcony then lit a cigarette, smoking the strong scent of tobacco while gazing deep into the darkness of the night. The wind that greeted his body along with a gust of smoke seemed to be able to provide calm for him at this time. Thoughts that can never be invited to rest and restlessness of the heart that torments him day and night, and this is excruciating. The hot embers that felt burning fingertips, Zain realized and threw out cigarette butts. Zain turned to the room and with a fury his eyes could no longer be shut until morning came, a thing that kept repeating in the night of these moments.
In the morning, Zain went downstairs just to refresh his sore throat due to cigarettes and alcohol last night, when he was about to open the refrigerator door his hands suddenly stopped, he said, zain stared at the three pieces of yellow paper attached to the refrigerator door, on the first paper written the words “Mas, breakfast I put in the upper right cupboard, I masakin fried rice mushroom”, I,
on the second paper it says “I'm sorry because I came out before you let me, I have to go to Mas's home, when cooking earlier I got a phone call if Rani's disease recur mas.”
Then on the third paper it says “Please apologize me for asking permission through the paper only, Mas, I was willing to talk directly, only I saw Masnya was busy receiving a phone from Reza, Reza, and that's talking about the important thing, hopefully what you and the employees are trying to do for this new project to succeed, Mas, Bismillah”
“Assalamualaikum darling”
“Waalaikumsalam Bu”
“What's wrong? Are you hungry”?
“No buk”
“What Zain has eaten?”
“Bu” already
“Keep what nak” is
“Bu, can Zain return ya bu?”
“Back, back where nak?”
“It feels so stifling, I want it to feel like Zain is splitting this chest and pulling it out”
Ningsih was silent for a moment, she understood the meaning of these words of her son
“Only by remembering Allah will the heart be quiet son, remember Allah, return to Him, your heart is arid because it actually misses its creator, the owner of your own heart. Stop venting it on those illicit drinks baby, believe me it won't help, it will make you even more desperate. God also misses you dear, God rebukes you with all this because God also misses you, because for too long you have tried to withdraw from Him, come back nak”
Zain closed the phone unilaterally, with silence without any words spoken from his lips. With his blank gaze Zain pensive, Mother's words rang in his head. Is God rebuking him right because God loves him?, or is it that all these trials and tribulations are a punishment because God hates him.
But this pain, this loss, and this disappointment, does not mean that if God hates him, God does not give away his happiness, God separates him from those he loves, God took away what should have been his, God only let him live in loss, there was only disappointment, his heart was not strong enough to bear all this.
Zain took the car keys and then he drove his car fast, he drove without direction and purpose, zain spurred speed with a troubled mind, and immediately Zain pressed the brake lever with all the strength of his legs, “Ciittttt...” The old papat who was right in front of Zain's car stopped in shock. “Arhghhhh shit shit” Zain pulled her hair and hit the steering wheel so her hands turn blue. The yellow light had just turned green, and the cars behind Zain were ringing the club with a frenzy, zain regained consciousness and returned to running his car slowly. The same thing almost repeated.
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“What's up Firman”?
Word circulated his eyes and he did not find what he was looking for, Fatma and Dad looked in wonder at what the Word was doing.
“Firman.”
“Eh yes Buk, Ayah” Firman looks back towards father and mother
Buk, sorry in advance, the purpose of my arrival here is to propose Zareen buk”
“A-what?”. Fatma was surprised and turned her eyes to Dad
“Firman, you will know if Zareen is married”
“Iya I know buk”
“Keep what do you mean by this?”
“Zareen is no longer with her husband buk, yah”
“Astaghfirullahal’adzim.” Fatma threw away with reddened eyes, from which they knew the disgrace of her daughter's household, Fatma went to the kitchen and let her tears fall.
“Whatever you hear out there, my daughter and her husband are fine, their household is fine”.
Dad continued his words “And even if Zareen and her husband parted ways, don't you understand how to go to a woman divorced by her husband, don't you understand how to keep the honor of a woman ”?
“I'm sorry dad, I didn't mean it that way, my intentions are good dad”. Firman said anxiously, he already knew all the problems that were going on at this time in the household of friends during his school, and he really had good intentions to Zareen, who was a friend of his, but he offended Zareen's father and mother, he forgot that the marital status of zareen and her husband had not been completely cut off, he cursed himself, how can he sort his ego and forget the sharia he already knows.
TO BE CONTINUE
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