Sharing Love: Is My Husband Yours?
Stupid Woman

Darwin refused to divorce me. That's exactly what I thought. Until I finally asked him. "Why don't you want to divorce me, Mom? Now or later it's the same, we're going to get divorced. The longer you hold me, the more you'll only hurt me."

And, Mas Darwin said, "I can't, Rania. When you left first .. I just realized ... there's something missing in my life. I don't want to lose you. I'm not ready." Darwin seemed to mean it.

I was astonished at Mas Darwin's words and then I said, "I'm not something you can have as you please, Mas. The wife is not a collection. You already have Alya, your true love. Then let go of me!"

"I can't stand being your wife. I want a divorce with you as soon as possible." My words were repeatedly ringing in the ears of Mas Darwin, even to this very night.

Darwin then looked at my sleeping face. He looked at my stomach. He wanted to rub and stroke my stomach. He wanted to feel his son's movements. But he was worried that he would wake me up. So, he broke that intention.

A few days later, my mother looked healthier. Darwin had been back to Indralaya for days because he had to go to work. I've thought carefully about ending this marriage.

The first thing I need to do is talk to my mom. 'I have to get a good divorce with Mas Darwin anyway, ' I thought. After that, I'll be suing for Mas Darwin's divorce.

After cooking, I ventured to talk to my mother. "Mom, thank you for asking Mas Darwin to live with me and leave Alya" I said. "But that's not necessary."

Mom scrunched her forehead while looking at me. 'May you accept this conversation well, ' my mind. 'May mother not shyok and become sick after hearing this.'

"I've known Mas Darwin had a wife since the beginning of my pregnancy, Mom. And, I had already decided to divorce Mas Darwin." I try to convey my wishes very carefully and slowly so that mother does not shyok.

I saw mom's expression. He scrunched his forehead and I continued saying, "But, Mas Darwin did not want to divorce me at that time. She will divorce me after I give birth. He has promised. Me and Darwin are getting a divorce."

"And right now, I don't think there's any point in waiting any longer, ma'am. I want to speed up the divorce."

"Why do you want to get divorced? Whereas, Darwin doesn't want to divorce you?" Mother's question hit me.

"I think you can see for yourself how Mas Darwin fought to maintain his relationship with Alya" I said. "They love each other, Mom and me. I'm just an unexpected third person in their household."

"Stupid!" swear mother immediately. "Stupid you, Rania!"

I looked at my mother and she said with emotion, "From the beginning you never knew they were married. You are not the third person. You are a victim. You're fooled, you're a victim."

"After knowing that, you want to just give your husband to Alya and they live happily together. In the meantime, you're suffering," cerocos mom. "Stupid you, Rania!"

"Take what is rightfully yours! You're Darwin's legal wife."

"But Darwin didn't love me, Mom," I said. "His heart belongs to Alya."

"The heart of the man is easy to change" said the mother. "He can't answer when you ask love or not. I'm sure she actually has the same feelings as you. But, he could not leave Alya. You know why Darwin couldn't let Alya go?"

"But look at the time with you! You always ignore it and ignore it. In fact, lest you've never served her in bed as a wife."

"Deg!" My heart was pierced with my mother's words. Mother blamed me for causing Mas Darwin to hang on to Alya.

"You think it's easy being a widow?" Mom smiled quite cynically. "Young, poorly educated, inexperienced girl..How can you raise your child alone?"

Mother's words sounded very demeaning to me. However, I so confidently said, "I'll find work, Mom. I can raise my son."

"Don't be too sure!" say mom immediately. "Life is not a soap opera. The world out there is cruel. You think anyone would accept you working in this big pregnant state?"

"Or, after you give birth later.. You can get a job, then what about the fate of your baby? You want to take him to work with you. Which employer would accept people to work while carrying a baby? Or, you want to leave your baby at home and you go to work, who's going to look after her?"

"Don't be so naive, Rania! Keep your house, tie your husband's heart!" said mother.

I gulped then I said, "I'll keep getting divorced, Mom."

"Hard-headed!" mom snapped immediately and I was very shocked.

"I will not let you be a widow. You know, I know very well what it's like to let go of a husband and let him be happy with another woman. When you're sad, she'll laugh with the other women out there who feel like winners."

"You will feel more hurt when you see them living happily, while you and your child suffer."

"Don't be a coward! Take what is yours!" press mom. "Darwin should be yours, not Alya's."

I'm silent. Not saying mother's words and not arguing.

"Your son needs his father, Rania. But, if you insist on divorce, go ahead! But, after the birth of your child you should leave it here. Because, I'll never be willing to have my granddaughter live in an abandoned life."

"Mom. Why Darwin and Mom are the same. You all want to take this kid from me. I'm his mother, I'm the one who's more entitled to this child than any of you." I can't accept Mom's decision.

"Because you will definitely not be able to take care of the child" said the mother. "You will be busy and abandon the child, the mother's grandson, the mother's flesh and blood. I'm not gonna let her."

"I can raise this kid myself, Mom. I can live independently, provide for, and take care of her." I maintain my stance.

"Where's the evidence?" said mother. "Don't just talk! But, prove it!"

"Before you can prove it, then do not expect the mother will believe and give up this child to you. You may divorce Darwin, but leave this child here after giving birth! Or, fix your household and live happily with Darwin and your son!" mother said she left to end our conversation and I was alone.