Waiting for First Love to Return
The proposal?

These two days there is no time to look at the photo of Arfan to release longing. Abah has taken more of my attention. After returning home from work on the day always call home, but always fail to talk to you. So in the morning. Always bang Bagas answering my phone calls. Which makes me even more worried about the situation. Prancing.

On Saturday morning I woke up early and prepared to go home to see my brother. And have ordered Martha to get ready. So I don't have to wait for her to come back when I pick her up. Tancap directly. Even at seven we had already departed from Marta's dormitory. He only complained in protest when he heard my orders that did not accept negotiations.

"What the hell is it, brother? Tumben came home suddenly gini?" Ask curiously. Because my brother just came home last week, and now I'm back to take him home. At first he refused when I took him home, because Monday is the exam tomorrow. But I forced.

"Sister doesn't know either. Bang Bagas told me to go home. Abah is sick." My answer is. ah, but bang Bagas does not explain anything about the state of abah. Or not to explain. Maybe you don't want to worry us?

"What's? Abah is sick? Pain relapsing?" Marta asked in panic, which I only answered with a nod of the head.

"How are things now? Was he hospitalized? That bad?" Marta's question signified her worry.

"I replied, brother. Don't make me panic, gini." I grabbed my hand driving. I just kept quiet. Not because I am not sad or worried. But also don't know how he is. Just guessing and counting. Which makes me sad until something bad happens. I won't forgive myself if I get very sick.

"Sister." Wiggling my arm for answers.

"Pray for the best." My answer is to try to calm down. Saddened? My life is immune to sadness.

Marta chose to pull out her phone to make a call. But never connect to the destination number. Martha sat down unsettled. Busy pressing the phone, then stick it to his ear. Slowly reciting when not connected. Repeatedly doing the same movement, but repeatedly he hissed irritatedly with a slow swearing.

"No number is active. Uh, try Ina's number." Say it yourself, then repeat pressing the number of his only brother-in-law.

But I chose silence. Calm the raging mind guessing the possibility that happened. And try to stay focused on the streets, do not let things happen that are not desirable.

"Nggk lifted brother. How's dong?" Ask Marta impatiently. I just snorted and turned the steering wheel veered down the stretch of road , then stepped on the gas faster. I am really impatient too. I hope our arrival is not too late.

Oh, brains. Don't frustrate me and it doesn't mean that until the time I've decided I don't have a place to go.

"Sister, slow down brother. "Marta's love was scared when we were on the lonely road, away from the traffic jam. It's out of the urban density. "Not until we die first." Excitement restrained. I'm still quiet. Doesn't rub my chatty adek that's chatty.

Ah, I used to be too. A chatter that is not far from jolly. Many ask for laughter. Easily familiar with everyone. Until the departure of Arfan brought with him many things in my life.

"Sister, the melanin is at the feet." Scared whining.

"Silent. Do not disturb the concentration. That's why the window is closed." I answered without seeing it. But he was afraid of my voice.

Indeed, the habit of Marta, if you ride a car like to enjoy the wind from the outside. That's why he doesn't like high speed. Not enjoying the journey, he said.

"Sister. don't miss brother. If you knew you'd be mad." Warned me about something I didn't understand at all.

"He doesn't know." I answered, still trying to relax. Even though my heart is in a state of turmoil.

"Sister is brother. I don't want to die, Brother, I'm not married yet. Poor Johan until I die first. Hiks. He will lose. I don't want him crying, and I can't comfort him." Marta's mouth would not be silent. Which makes me more upset.

It's not his voice that makes me angry. I love him. I never get tired of hearing his horror. But about loss? Crying out? I hate those words. Why would my brother even worry about others if crying and sad because of loss? He never cared when I cried for loss. He even sneered at me who failed to move on for years. Though. People say time is the best cure for liver injury? Apparently lying. I can't believe it.

After two hours of high speed, break the streets of the village. Now we have arrived in front of a simple house where we grew up. The house looks empty with the main door open.

Martha came down in haste. Even before I turned off my butut car engine. I only cursed in my heart at his attitude that never changed.

I ran into a small house that remained standing strong despite being consumed by age.

"Assalamualaik." My salutations. No one answered and welcomed me home. So I immediately followed Marta who had entered the abah room.

"Why?" I asked when Marta came out of the room with a grunt face.

"lady lies." He answered and sat in a wooden chair in the middle room.

I was surprised by Marta's accusation that she told me a lie. Pointing to myself not understanding . then look at the abah room. Seen there Abah was rukuk perform dhuha prayers. There is no sign of rheumatic abah relapse, because abah is still able to pray by standing facing the qibla. And his wrinkled face looked fresh without storing any pain.

I came back and sat down beside Marta with a lazy sigh.

"You know, I didn't come home. Studying for exam preparation." Marta grumbled when she saw me approaching her.

"Why did you ask me to come home?" Confused, looking back at the door of Abah's room that opened.

"Sister who was asked to go home, because it had not been home for a long time. Not me." Still scowling him. I just sighed lazily hearing Marta's scolding.

"Abang asks to invite you to kok. "apply as I am.

"What yes? Where's brother anyway? Ina ain't no shit either." Unbelieving, and circulating the view of a quiet house of residents. Get out and see Bagas' locked bang house. I just shrugged my shoulders, no matter what.

Bang Bagas house next to the house. So from the front door of the house, you already see the door is open or closed.

"So healthy?" I asked and shook hands, alternating with Marta.

"As you can see. Healthy abah wal afiat. Who said you were sick?" Ask Abah who is sitting between us.

"He." Marta pointed at me, which made me look at her.

"Yes Abang said I told him to go home and take Marta's deck. And his voice is sad. I want to ask you to talk to me, said my brother again rest. Yes kirain because I'm sick." I obviously don't feel good, and hugged the man I missed too.

"Keep you regret coming home? Because you're not sick?" Ask with a sad face.

"Neggk." We answered simultaneously, and hugged his old body, but still dashing in our eyes.

"Really?" Ask him in disbelief, with a probing look.

"really. Kangen is the same." Marta struggled in Abah's arms. I just kept hugging him tight.

"Aren't you the same?" Moved my head slowly leaning on him.

"Kangen bah." I answered with tears beginning to melt. Not because of abah. But because remembering the weight withholds longing. A longing that continues to eat away at my reasoning.

"That's what your brother asked you to come home. " She said softly with her hands still hugging her two daughters.

"But Marta the day after tomorrow there's a lo Bah test." Her eyes were spoiled, I just glanced lazily. Enjoying the warmth of the embrace.

"Yes, home study can. Bring a book, right?" Answer me casually, and scramble the hair of Marta who is still reluctant to close.

"Bring."

"Where is bah? How can you not see?" My toot.

"It's a weekend, take a walk." The answer is relaxed, without guilt. Which makes me and Marta sigh. I've been jockeying on the street because of worry, which can even be scorned along the way by the beloved adek. Eh, apparently? What is feared is okay. The one who told me to go home was enjoying the weekend.

"Where?" Marta started kepo.

"Something."

"What's asking us to go home, Bah? Just kangen?" Askaqua. It's not usually so.

"Later tonight there's a special guest for my son." He answered by putting a smile on his face. And rubbed my back gently.

I saw Marta, Who? Ask through the eyes. But he just lifted a rock don't know. Don't want to know either.

"Later tonight someone will propose to my son. Actually, a few weeks ago he proposed through Abah, and today's official application." Obviously, abah, answering our confusion through eye glances.

"Who's bah? " Marta was shocked, sitting up straight and eyes widened.

Between the two girls, she is the only one with a boyfriend. While me? It's common knowledge that I'm still waiting for the wonders of the past, to be the future as well.

I was a little surprised too. I feel like something is starting to go wrong. If that's asking Johan? Marta must have been excited earlier.

Abah saw us take turns. With his shady face, and his unfading smile.

"Who proposed, Bah? And for whom? Not for me, right? I was a kid." Ask Marta.

"You want to be proposed? Ready already?"

"Still in college bah. My boyfriend's willing to wait until I graduate." Answer with manyun.

"Kalo Tasya?" Replace. I'm just mute. I'm still waiting for Arfan to come home to answer. Has he gone home? But here's a proposal coming.

"Yes Tasya's sister who is ready for marriage, bah."

"Look at me, son." Raise my chin to see it. I'm still quiet. I don't know what I feel. Following his request, he looked at her with eyes that were getting wet. She touched my cheek gently.

"He's a good man, son. You also know him. Abah had no reason to refuse. You're 28 years old, son. Wait until when? "

"Who the hell is he bah?" Martha still asked.

"Rayhan's." He said the name I know. Which made me feel so incredulous.