Can't Have You
Not as hot as before
The weather is always changing
Sometimes it's hot and it's raining,
But I don't want the heart to change.
Like the wind that is not necessarily the direction in which it comes. Sometimes friendly but not friendly
Likewise, time keeps turning
Seconds to minutes is something that passes.
I don't want to be fenced off in taste or form
If only time could I turn back
But it's not possible
Because it's not a cassette tape, a CD, or a memory hp that I can play whenever I want
I just want my old heart
Where everything is so beautiful
When I first met
Your eyeballs are round looking at me meaningfully and jokingly laughing and panjamu that I miss so much and I never get tired of looking at that face
Over Time Running in 2021 at the end of the 10th month there is a conversation of two people who feel each other has begun to look not warm anymore like before. That's where the Sape girl began to be surprised and confused because ovan seemed to have changed, not as he knew.
Sape girl starts to wonder at herself even on ovan why is ovan starting to change? What was? Does he have any fault or does he do anything inappropriate? Or does Ovan have problems of her own? That's where a thousand questions started to come out of his mind.
Sape girl looks agitated towards ovan's attitude, even she asks here and there the same people who know Ovan.
Why is Ovan starting to change? Then his friends ovanpun wonder also do not know why ovan is also like that. They didn't even hear from Ovan.
Something is different from you
Your eyes aren't as warm as they used to be
You're getting away without me noticing
That I'm the one who has to understand
I did it all for you
You don't have to ask me the pain in my heart
And when you choose 'to go
I won't regret it
(Ha-ah, ha-ah) hm-hm
Maybe you'll never know
How deep this feeling is
More than it looks
Even more than possible
You feel it (ha-ah)
I did it all for you (for you)
You don't have to ask me the pain in my heart
And when you choose 'to go
I won't regret it (don't regret it)
Oh-oh (for me)
(And if you choose to leave, I won't regret it) yeah
Once in my life I loved
And get me hurt, oh, yeah
I did it all for you
There's no need to ask me grievously in my heart (and when)
And when you choose 'to go
I won't regret it (don't regret it)
(I did it all for you
(No need to ask me grievously in my heart)
And when you choose 'to go
I won't regret it, I won't regret it
Over time this sape girl keeps her mind until she is not focused and not thinking of others, the talk from his mouth that often comes out is only about ovan and the name of ovan continues when he met his Cousins because he was so in love and had such deep feelings for the figure of a man who he never met it, his mind always remembered about Ovan.
After a few days he began to find out about the poetry made by Ovan. It turns out that Ovan has a problem of his life, he misses his two masters who are still not met until now.
In the poem ovan poured out all his heart and there sape girl understood that ovan changed not because of him but because of his personal problems that never ended with happiness.
Ovan is a man 2 whose life was destroyed from childhood he did not get affection from his parents, he also did not get affection from his father. Her mother's father abandoned them.
Ovan was only 2 brothers but worse than that the sister of Ovan was never cared for by his parents only his grandparents who had raised them but now his grandmother and grandfather had been all died.
Then both of them live their lives without grandparents anymore, even without both parents. Therefore ovan decided to go to Jakarta looking for the whereabouts of his parents because there is information that his mother is in Jakarta.
After arriving there he gave news to this sape girl that he was in Jakarta to look for work, but said people who knew him he went to find his father's mother. But when he was told to the sape girl that he was being held in Jakarta, the Sape girl was shocked to hear that he was there. Then the sape girl said why don't you tell me that you went to Jakarta? I'm not important to you anymore? Ovan no longer knows what to answer because the girl's question is not stopped.
Now it has been a few months running tidings not as warm as before, sape girls are always saturated when they miss a pair of beautiful eye beads. That could always make him laugh without feeling the wounds that had once been in his heart.
When he spoke and laughed with Ovan the sape girl returned like a person who never had a burden she seemed to live a happy life on his introduction to Ovan. Ovan is so considerate, honey, his speech is telling the good and always say the patient never despair even though he is being hit by a thousand problems. He still had time to make the sape girl smile (maybe that's one way he loves the sape girl).
Although they never met but they feel equipped even though only limited to chat, phone, vidio call only. Then the expression of the heart of a sape girl like this "Although I communicate through social media I've been so comfortable with this same she how to meet later?. This is how if already love died with him, already already baper (brought feelings) hehe. But if I'm honest he is the one who managed to conquer my heart and make me love this same him because of the problem of my love that used to never feel as deep and passionate as love and love are the same opposite sex and this is my first time getting comfortable with someone I've never seen for real in plain sight.
Many stories that we have shared in this story, be it joy or sorrow.
It was at a point where I was tired of the inexhaustible delinquency of being real with so many contentious issues with each other. Yes, he fell in love online but once there is a problem especially about the feeling of a real pain oath. until finally I decided to be happy and actually there was no communication for a month or so where he already had a new replacement besides me and me too.
But thankfully God reunited me with him and from that problem we learned to respect each other, trust each other, and maintain each other's heart and communication.
I know we both have hopes with the same amiin to meet each other but God has not allowed ya want how again?. I am here only to pray that I and you will be met at the right time and someday may you be my soul mate.(the unrelenting prayer offered by the Sape Girl).
Tomorrow the day after Sape girl who loves Men Sambori very much even though her love is only limited to words and limited to the direction aka love itself. He had such a strong determination to go to the birthplace of the man he loved even though he was not in his village he kept his heart there to prove that he really wanted to to be a part of the life of the man he admired for 7 years.
There he will leave a million melodies of love for a man he never met when he missed him. Along the way he will pray that Subhanahuata'allah's god can grant and arrange the meeting they have longed for.
Am I wrong to love someone I have never met in my life? Do I also sin when I want to be with him? Or am I one of the unlucky ones? Well those who meet people they like and then with their old bonds of ignorance? Then they are happy, then share the joy of sorrow for the feeling they build, for love or for the house of love they build to get a child who is right? The sape girl began to fantasize unreasonably over Ovan.
She was a woman who had been disappointed by many men and promised here and there by a man who had no heart over women.