My IDOL Is Mine
Expressions of feeling

Now Rania is sitting leaning in the garden, today Bima get an order from her superiors to immediately go to the office even though this week she applied for leave.

Now Rania fights with her mind while staring in front of her a whole family consisting of a mother father and his two children. He felt like it was his family.

"At least I've felt it, but it's another thing with Alya. He would never feel that way" murmured Rania softly who was still staring faithfully at a family

Not realizing it, Tears also flowed over his cheeks, this afternoon he was very anxious to think of Alya's departure tomorrow. They will be separated for a long time.

"Lord, I'm not ungrateful and I'm not complaining but can I cry to remember the bitter life of my servant and my brother??" Mumbled slowly. It hurt deeply in his heart.

Rania is an older sister who never thinks of herself even she always thinks of Alya.

"Sister." The voice of someone Rania knew very well was her sister Alya

Rania quickly wiped away her tears "you know whose sister is here?" Rania's question distracted Alya

Alya shook her head "the instinct of a brother heheh" Alya replied wanting to comfort her brother

Alya approached her brother "don't be sad anymore. We can call and vidio call kak. I can take care of myself, brother. Brother doesn't need to worry" Alya calmed down while holding her brother's hand. Alya understood very well what was going on in her brother's heart.

Rania smiled as she watched the beautiful face of her sister who was very Hardy living her life. He never complained about what was destined for him. Rania knew that her sister was harboring deep wounds and the silence she had sealed shut in her heart. Rania once tried to seduce her sister to want to tell a glimpse of what her sister felt but Alya never wanted to tell a story.

Rania knows very well that Alya always cries at night without wanting to be known by others including herself. Even Rania saw with her own eyes if her sister came out of the cemetery with her eyes moist and after meeting her, Alya immediately changed as usual that there was no problem.

After Crying happened and immediately he had to return to his usual attitude.

sometimes Rania thinks what a scary thing is that the problem of her sister's life. Feeling very sorry but Rania cannot force her sister to open up and talk about her feelings.

Although the affection he gave was as good as Rania could but still Alya needed the love of parents. No one can match the affection of parents.

Hearing Alya's words, Rania nodded "before you leave, can you ask Al for something?" Said Rania with her eyes.

"What is that brother?" Alya asked curiously

Alya thought for a moment, during his life he never told his feelings to others including his brother, he was afraid if he would add to the burden of others with him telling about his feelings. But seeing her brother who begged her for the first time, Alya nodded with a heavy heart.

"Alright, brother, but after this behave as usual and do not think too much. Promise??" Alya said while showing her little finger. With a quick movement Rania welcomed the finger and nodded.

"Where to start, brother. Hmmm Alya was confused" said Alya about to start.

with the focus of Rania prepared to listen to her brother's complaints for the first time.

"Hmm maybe I never told my feelings to brother but what I was going through was very difficult, brother. It started with our parents who I didn't know and didn't know their real faces except to stare at them in pictures. Alya also does not know when this sad feeling arises but what Alya remembers when the first time Alya school, our age is quite far and we also have no other family. By the time my sister walked me, there was a feeling of sadness that I didn't even know what it was. It was very sad when I saw a friend of my age being taken by both parents but I was just a big brother who was concerned. Not ungrateful, but I really want to be like them. I was so jealous and so eager like them. But I was very aware of our condition at that time" said Alya stopped his sentence for a moment. She shed tears in front of her brother. Very sick and tight in his chest.

Rania just fell silent focused on listening to her sister with her eyes that had begun to swell because she continued to shed tears from earlier.

Alya set her breath "initially I wanted to tell my sister but Alya could not bear to tell it because it would make my sister also sad. I kept it to myself and my sister knew it was very painful plus my brain kept thinking and asking why should I and my sister have to experience this. But thinking like that will not get results" he continued while glancing at Rania.

Rania was silent without a word, her mouth felt locked hearing the expression of the feeling Alya felt.

Alya looked at her sister with a smile "sirties know when sister is getting married, that night I was very frustrated. Because I feel so sorry for you, on the day you're waiting for there's no father and no mother with you. This tightness in me is not just thinking about my feelings but partly thinking about your feelings. I'm so sick to see you not being accompanied by our parents. Does your sister know what it feels like? Yes, my brother knows. If it relates to my interests I can still hold it but if it relates to you. I can't handle it" Alya kept telling me.

rania's tears became more and more "no one knew about my feelings, brother, about my brain that kept thinking this. I honestly feel like taking medicine at a very high dose so I can catch up with our parents because it has exceeded my pain limit but it will only add to your burden. The mental pain I'm dealing with is excruciating for me. I have to fight with my logic and my heart for no solution. But I was conscious for a moment and prayed that it would not happen to me. And when this time was very sick and almost crazy made" again Alya stopped her because the sobbing Rania getting stronger.

not wanting to continue, Alya pulled her brother into her arms "already brother, don't keep crying. You promised me. After knowing how I feel you will calm down a little. And honestly Alya was a little bit relieved. Don't cry anymore" Alya calmed down.

Rania can spill her feelings in an easy way to cry in contrast to Alya who is very difficult to cry and does not want others to know if she is crying.

Alya was very tough compared to Rania.

That afternoon they spent hugging each other to strengthen each other.

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