RAGS
Raga | 05

Dirga POVs

Time passed sometimes set aside a mystery whose existence often hinders the pace of enjoying happiness in the future.

Sometimes I think, is it true that everyone who looks okay is the one who feels the deepest wounds and is difficult to heal?.

Today Indira and I are in the public library to accompany Indira as usual every weekend. I observed Indira who was focusing on the book she was reading,I have no interest in reading a book right now that interests me is a woman who looks fine even though there are so many wounds that are raining on her.

"Ra?" call me.

"Hmm" Indira was still reluctant to shift her focus.

"Do you feel weird?"

"Sir"

"Yaudah" I gave up on talking to him because it was useless if he was still focusing on his book.

After returning from the library, Indira and I decided to visit the orphanage where we met for the first time.

"Welcome, Dirga and Rara" welcomed the owner of the home, Mother Princess.

"How's mom doing?" ask Indira.

"Mother is fine now the evidence can still stand here welcoming you both" said the Princess' mother kindly and led us into the parlour.

"Sister Rara!" shouted a small child who ran in waves approaching Rara.

"Riska, how are you, baby?" rara asked as she carried the little boy into her arms.

"Well, why don't you come here so rarely? Riska kangen kak Rara" sulks the girl in Rara's arms.

"Oh so Riska kangennya same brother Rara doang nih, same sister is not?" tanyaku.

"No, Riska kangen brother prince also really" said the girl moved to hug me.

"I'm sorry baby, I haven't been here lately because my sister has been doing a lot of schoolwork" Indira said, stroking Riska's hair, which is now in my arms.

"Just like Riska is crumbling" Riska said.

"Don't ditu dong will lose the beauty of loh kalo ngambek, kakak buyin ice cream for you" said Rara showed plastic containing ice cream that we deliberately bought on the way to the home.

Riska was smiling when she found out that we had ice cream. Without the ba-bi-bu Riska straight down from my sling and snatch the plastic ice cream in Indira's hand then ran towards the dining room where the other children had gathered.

"Let's have the others waiting inside" said the Princess commanding us to come into the dining room.

I saw about twenty children in this room. At first glance the memories of the mass also burst in for a moment to take over my focus.Without realizing I reviewed a small smile when remembering how I met Indira first.

"Dirgaaa" cried Indira who surprised me because her face was quite close to me.

"Apaan anyway" ketusku then went following the Princess who was sitting at the dining table.

"Basic polar prince!" I faintly heard Indira swearing in annoyance because I managed to ignore her, again.

The atmosphere in this parlour is so warm, I love this place because only here I can be myself. I can freely express myself with the less fortunate little angels living in this cruel world.

Indira looks so calm and cheerful. I smiled when I saw him laughing and playing with the children of the orphanage. Indira really likes children.

Sometimes I feel weird about how I feel. Often my heart pounded so hard just because it looked at Indira laughing loosely or felt really tight when he saw Indira crying let alone hurt. Maybe it's because I loved her so much since childhood that I felt so, I thought.

"Here you are" call Indira.

"This is how you take it off?" tanya Indira showed her hair stuck on the iron swing.

"Cut yeah?" tanyaku.

"Huh? Don't dong, baby"

"Yes, I love you too" I joked that I automatically got the gift of a shoe landing beautifully on my head.

"Rasain noh" ledek Indira.

Strange, maybe that's how I feel right now. I can only talk at length when alone with Indira or my family. The rest I will be like a walking stone. Sometimes I think I have a double personality.

"Ish don't do it dong Dir" said Indira.

I still quietly put on my mainstay flat face, acting as if I did not care even though in my heart I could not bear to vomit laughter seeing the face of melas Indira which is very rare I met.

"Come on Dir, you can ask anything if you help me" Indira added melas.

"OK" I said then helped remove the curls of Indira's hair on the iron swing.

"Rome yuk" asked me after successfully untie Indira's hair.

"Any more time?"

"No, Ra, it's dark because you've just healed"

"Jaudah but promise next week we should come here again" Indira asked.

"okay"

We say goodbye to the residents of the home before returning home, clearly Indira's reluctance to return home from this place.

"Dirga" call Indira after silence ruled in the car.

"Hm"

"How does it feel to be in love?"

"HA?" I shouted in surprise at Indira's sudden question.

Indira never dated. He was only close to me at school or on the go. That's why I was a little surprised when Indira asked me like that.

"Why are you asking that?" aish shit, why should I stammer.

"Repo!"

"Why?Answer me Indira"

"You answered my question and I'll answer your question" Indira said.

"I don't know" I said doubtfully.

"Do not know? You've got about six ex-girlfriends so far" Indira said.

"I'm horrified" I said as I stopped at the red light so I could focus on talking to Indira.

Indira looks very serious waiting for an explanation from me. I am so anxious to see him now. If only I had seen him as a man and a woman I would have asked Indira to be the full owner of my heart. But I love him and he only love each other in the context of friends.

"You want to know why I don't know how love is when my ex-boyfriend says so much?" I stared in both beads.

Indira just nodded enthusiastically.

"Because not everything that dates is based on love and love tap..."

"But?"asked Indira to cut my words.

"Dengerin first, don't get used to it!" myrag.

"People are mostly dating because they are trapped by feelings they consider love when they just like it" I explained.

"meaning?" ask Indira.

"I mean people who are dating do not necessarily have love in their hearts. It could just be because of curiosity or love for a moment that is misunderstood. Love cannot be expressed in words because it is a gift from God. Try to notice even married people can get divorced just for the reason that they do not love each other" my connection before returning to focus on the steering wheel of the car because the lights are green.

Indira was still speechless probably trying to digest my words.

"There are even people who love each other but are not bound by status. So basically a status cannot be used as a benchmark for love or not someone" I said before we entered the residential complex area.