That is Fate
Guilt Ustadz Sakha

Yes, I do want to cry but it's impossible here.

"gue is okay, santuy (relax) aja hihi" while laughing blandly . Then I saw the grill containing the fish that had changed color that made my tongue tempted "Eh yes, the fish already there is a Mateng?"

Patul nodded "Now, eat"

I took the fish and sat in the corner, so this heartbreak made my stomach flutter.

***

Ustadz Sakha POV

I saw Shazfa more silent today, my heart wondered what was going on? why? . I'm sure at this time there is a disappointment felt , it could be because of Umi's words this morning or because of myself .

Safia's question honestly has a point as well. Most of the children of scholars do have a destiny to be betrothed, including me.

I don't resist and regret that, but why should I?.

"Allah, answer dong bang"

I came back with my consciousness where I had to answer his question. But what should I answer? Moreover, I know that there are now a pair of eyes that are curious about my answer.

"Emh, actually. ana..."

I hung up my words, I really am completely dead-end at this moment . Because to be honest, it hurts so much and lying to them is more cruel.

I see Shazfa is really waiting for my answer, Jeez Shazfa.

"Ana doesn't know either, but as a human being you can only hope" My love. Oh, my God, he's getting pissed at me.

I looked at him with sadness, my mind everywhere to ignore the words of his friend who I did not see since, ah let it be.

"Sir, anyone want to ask?" I said to Shazfa.

Whatisthis? why is he pouting? oh, my God, I was wrong again. Then a few minutes later he just shook his head. Loh, is that an answer?.

Until they finally left us both, giving us space to talk. I saw Shazfa trying to resist but he finally resigned.

The atmosphere was silent again, maybe I should straighten it out, I thought .

"Are you angry with Brother?"

"Either bang, I don't know" he replied.

"Sometimes I feel special, but sometimes I also feel foreign" he continued.

Why does his words make my heart feel like it's being stabbed? Shazfa you're that special deck, don't you feel it? curse me in my heart.

True to my guess, all his anxiety started from Umi's speech this morning.

The apology I said turned out not to make the atmosphere warm again. I really didn't mean to get her stuck but I loved her too.

"Then, did you really not know about the matchmaking of Brother?"

The question jolts me, how does he know I'm gonna be betrothed?. All right, I'll tell you everything, I'll surrender my destiny now.

I started to tell you slowly.. I saw Shazfa enjoying my story, his response was also relaxed. I think it'll be safe for me, uh not just for me but for both of us. Until finally.....

"Do you know that the Rest of God is also located in the Rest of Parents? If parents don't approve, what about God?"

The deg!

Really, I was stuck in a dark room, not knowing where to go. Shazfa was right, God does not approve of us now.

What the hell am I doing? I hurt a woman now, the woman I want to be happy with me, it's not like this is the end I've been having all this time. Oh, that's my way. I'm taking his leave now.

This is the end, we will not be together, I murmured.

"Kha, what's wrong?" fathan asked me a jerk. Since when is he here?

"Ah you, ngagetin aja" I brief

"That's a big mess in the face?" search Fathan

"Shazfa knows it all". I said making him aghast.

"Certainly????"

"Astaghfirullah, heh bahlul.. Istighfar. May be sad but do not drag . God has his own way of life"

Right said Fathan, I can't keep doing this.

"Had the gala? yuk merge . Pity the time of the woman who fans the fish?"

"Well back to the house" I refused.

"Don't let the coward be permanent huh" said Fathan

"True as well" I muttered. I followed Fathan to rejoin them, I'll stay away as far as I can as long as it can treat his heartache.

POV Author

At the moment, they are busy with their duties. Ustadz Sakha with Ustadz Fathan fanned the fish they roasted, Cow and Pipe mengolek chili, while Patul and Sasa cooked rice.

The atmosphere became completely silent, until finally Ustadz Fathan took the guitar.

"Let's not awkward, anyone want to sing?" taw Ustadz Fathan's

The guys (Patul, Sasa, Cow, and Pipe) exchanged lyrics, then pulled Sasa forward, Shazfa being pulled into misbehavior, what should he sing? thought.

"What am I?" ask Sasa

"it's okay, quickly sing" said Pipa

Sasa looked resigned, he ignored the presence of Ustadz Sakha now.

"What do you want to sing?" ask Ustadz Fathan.

"Against blessing" Sasa briefly made everyone turn his head.

**hmm mm

Beautiful all stories

who have passed in one love

We who have ever dreamed

live it all, there's only us

But it turns out in the end

there's no way I can force it

Rest is not on side

at us**

All enjoying the song, they were touched except for Ustadz Sakha who now felt more guilty.

**Maybe I asked

our story is forever

not crossed my mind

when my day is without you

All the ways I tried

keep our love

I always put it in my prayers

but I can't fight blessing**

Sasa ended the song, it seems he can no longer continue the song . He went back to Patul but it turned out that his rice was Mateng, he glanced at the plate that was still on wet, Finally he took a cloth to clean the plate.

"Wesss Mateng, yuk on yuk" Take Ustadz Fathan.

The author POV end