The Agent's Shadow Bed
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Assalamu'alaikum

Stop by yuk in the author's new novel

titled Getting Wounds

"Shera I want us to get divorced." The word divorce came out of Bagas' mouth just like that.

"Divorce?" I'm surprised.

"Yes." Yeah."

"Why should we divorce? all this time our marriage was fine, I also did not feel wrong, even we almost never fought," I chuckled.

"We need to get divorced." Bagas again confirmed the words divorce from his mouth.

"Give me the reason why we should get divorced? 10 Years with me." I kept convincing my husband.

"I'm a woman, Shera." Bagas said words that were actually painful to him himself.

"What's? you're a woman, Mas?" I asked full of excitement. I wish it was just a lie.

"Yes, I'm a woman like you." Bagas reaffirmed his words.

I was standing in front of him directly sitting on the floor. The tears. It's like this is all a dream and I want to wake up soon. I laugh while crying. Ten years is not a short time. I spend a lot of time with him. Those beautiful memories crossed my mind. My body was weak, helpless, to look at him I could not afford. During this time Bagas was always kind and caring. I even feel like I am living in heaven. He gave me everything, treasure, love and the throne. He protected me from anything that would hurt me. But now reality seems to be laughing at me. I'm like a fool who knows nothing.

Mas Bagas sat in front of me while bowing his head. He did not dare look at me who was sad.

"Why? why are you just now saying Mas?"

I kept questioning his reasons all along lying to me.

"I'm sorry Shera, I'm sorry." Just an apology from my husband's lips.

"I love you Mas, all this feels like being struck by lightning but I'm not dead." I was crying and crying. The truth is too sudden or I am in love with it.

"Sorry Shera, I have no intention of hurting you." Mas Bagas cried in front of me while bowing his head.

"Hik hik hik." I can only cry, unable to be angry, let alone rebel against fate.

Bagas looked at my puffy face, he caressed my cheeks that were wet with tears.

"Don't cry, I don't want all these facts to be present either. I want to live with you." Bagas said in tears holding both of my cheeks.

"Hik hik hik, is this fate or punishment for us Mas?" I was in despair.

"No, I don't know either. It's not both of us's fault. I also just found out that I was a woman once," said Bagas.

"Mas hik hik hik, we are happy why should it be like this? hik hik hik." I kept crying. It feels hard to accept this reality and destiny.

"Who is guilty? is this because of our sin or is God testing us?" My word.

"Prophette Shera, God will surely give the best for us. I'm sure you'll be happy later even if you're not with me" she said, calming my heart down.

"Astagfirullah, hik hik. O Allah grant the servant patience." I kept saying it while sobbing crying.

I don't remember anything after that. Maybe I fainted from crying. When I woke up I didn't find Mas Bagas next to me. I get out of bed. Out room. I heard a great quarrel between Mas Bagas and his mother. I just peeked out the door of her mother's room that was slightly open.

"Just because of the treasure you made me a man, greedy," said Mas Bagas to his mother.

"Bagas, look at your life now. Saved treasure, and you can be happy with your wife" said her mother.

"Happy? you broke all my happiness, Mom. You made me hurt the person I love the most, Mom."

"You're stupid yourself. It's a man for what to reveal your identity again. Stay happy just bother."

"I thought you'd feel guilty, ma'am, but I was wrong. You are a mother without a heart. For your own sake you sacrificed me. Why should I be born to a treasure-crazy woman like you?"

"I don't know myself. It's still a good thing I didn't throw you away and keep you. Otherwise, you've been living on the street."

"I'd rather stay on the streets than stay in this palace but my life is like a doll that you keep setting up, even my gender you set."

My heart was getting so sad hearing everything. I thought it was a dream. Or Mas Bagas might be looking for an excuse to divorce me. But all this is true. And it was his mother who made all this happen.

I ran out of the house. It feels like my life is broken into pieces. Yesterday's happiness seemed to pass without a trace. I kept crying under the rain that was soaking my body. The feet continue to move without direction. My tears are filled with rain. I sat down and cried asking God to turn everything into a dream and when I woke up there was still Mas Bagas.

"Hik hik hik."

"Shera let's go home." The voice of Mas Bagas behind me while carrying an umbrella to cover my body from the rain.

"Mas I love you, why did all this just happen? hik hik hik."

"Shera, I'm sure we'll be happy, even if we're not together. No need to regret fate and cry."

"God has chosen a different path for us."

Mas Bagas hugged me from behind. We rained together.

"Cry for today and smile for tomorrow, I don't want to see these tears fall on your cheeks again."

"Hik hik Mas."

No matter how much rain falls. My tears did not stop dripping. The sky seems to know what I feel now.

"Sheraaa I love youuu." Shout Bagas for the last time before tomorrow that word will never be spoken again.

"Mas Bagas! I love you!" I also shouted among the sound of the rain.