The Eye Of Death
Chapter 4: Death Is Absolute

Time has passed, now I am 10 years old. Since then, I've been writing down everything that's happened in the diary. The therapy that I was running was fruitful, now my fear of water gradually began to disappear. Now, my whole body can enter the water, even though I haven't been able to dive into the pool for more than 30 seconds. However, to me it is an achievement that I should be grateful for.

Right now, I can go back to my usual daily life. Although I had been in school for a month after the therapy first started, but this was when I felt more relieved and felt able to face my fears. All thanks to the hard work of Mother who has been willing to slam the bones to support our family while helping the trauma treatment therapy that I experienced. In my opinion, all of that can not be separated from the role of the diary that I write every day. At first I wrote a diary because I was bored and wanted something new, but over time I tried to write all my feelings honestly on paper. If I think back, maybe that's the real purpose of motherhood, so that mother knows my feelings, circumstances, and development during this time through the diary I wrote.

The more I write, the more things I don't understand and find difficult to solve. The main thing that makes me think deeply is the thick red thread hanging over someone's head. Even more terrifying, everyone who had a dense red thread on their head had experienced death. Remembering it, I seemed to be able to see back clearly second by second when death picked them up, because indeed I was always on the scene when it happened. It was very scary and made my hair goosebumps.

I feel like I am cursed. I don't think it was a coincidence, because it didn't just happen once or twice. Since the first death I saw, I have seen 12 deaths over the past 2 years in different ways. Sudden illness or long-term nested illness, age, accident, crime. I saw with my eyes the moments of death caused by things, as if they had no other choice. All of this raised a question in my mind.

"Is a person's death preventable?"

At that time, I had not realized that I would find an answer so soon.

That day was the middle of December. Winter left the entire city covered in white snow. The new school year started in early September, so I had to take the final exams in the cold of December. On my way home after the art exam, I decided to visit a park on the edge of a famous beautiful lake in the area where I live. I was so weak in the arts, that I wanted to clear my mind with the beautiful view of the lake so clear. When I arrived at the park, I realized something very important. No one in the midst of the cold of December wants to clear their minds by looking at the clear lake, because of course the lake will freeze exposed to the cold of winter.

I took a long breath. I'd better get home before I start freezing in here. I took a step towards home and planned to enjoy her day by watching tv accompanied by a cup of hot chocolate. Suddenly, my steps stopped. I heard something bouncing off the lake. It turned out to be a ball reflected in the middle of the frozen surface of the lake. Maybe someone accidentally kicked him too hard. I better not ignore it. This lake has a depth of up to 20 meters, at least that is what is written on the warning board. There may be people willing to risk their lives just for a ball. And it turns out that guy is right in front of my eyes.

A little boy was walking cautiously on the frozen surface of the lake. Behind him, there were several children shouting at him. Not to stop him, they asked him to take the ball faster. Seeing them treat her like that made me unable to stay silent. I walked over the frozen and slippery surface of the lake carefully, approaching the boy. The child continued to walk closer to the ball with a frightened face. His struggles paid off, he managed to reach the ball. The boy's face was beaming, so he couldn't see where he was going.

Legs slipped. Fortunately, I managed to grab her arm - after struggling to get close to the child. I was worried about what was going to happen, so I chose to approach the child to help him in case something bad happened. My mind at that time was only filled with worry towards that child. The little boy bowed, thanked him and went towards his arrival. I regretted my actions at the time. When the boy turned around, I realized something. He had a thread of deep red dangling above his head. Instantly the ice on which the child stood began to crack and he splashed into the lake.

I was trying so hard to help the child, in the hope that I could prevent his death. I reached out into the icy lake and pulled the child up to the surface. My efforts succeeded. The child survived death. I felt happy and relieved with breath gasping. The child looked shivering and could do nothing. I carried the child to the edge of the lake carefully. When the edge of the lake stayed a few steps away, the small tree branch that cut itself fell onto the frozen surface of the lake, as if forcing the child to face the door of death once again. That branch made a rift. Not strong enough to hold our weight, the ice on which I stood crushed and we both splashed into the lake.

I woke up in a room. I know this room. This is the hospital patient room. My mother sat anxiously beside the bed.

"Zen, do you know how worried mom is?! You haven't recovered from the trauma, now you almost drowned again. Don't do anything dangerous!"

Mom snapped at me in a subtle way. His face depicted his anxiety and tears streaming down his cheeks. Surely, I'm afraid of losing me again.

"I'm sorry, Mom. I promise I won't repeat it,"

Mom and I hugged each other. After the atmosphere became calmer, I asked the mother about the child I helped. According to the mother's story, the child was the victim of bullying at her school. At that time, he was forced to take the ball that his friend kicked towards the lake. Unfortunately, the boy could not be saved.

Although I had expected it, but hearing the reality of the child's heartbreaking life made me teary-eyed. Mom calmed me down and hugged me tightly. Had I realized the red thread sooner, or tried harder, would the child be alive today? Or is there nothing else I can do?

The worried mother chose to provide trauma treatment until I was fully healed. I can only accept, considering that mom was very worried. That day, I recalled my father's words about death.

"When the time of death comes, nature will end its life, however,"

Not to forget, I recorded everything in the diary book. A certainty I have found. Death is inevitable. Whatever you do, death will come to you when the time comes. There's nothing you can do.