Fallen Dreams
The Guilty

TW: Negative Thoughts, Self-Harm

"Why did you do this to this father? She has raised her child with all her abilities, and it turns out that her daughter's life must end in your hands, her own classmate. What are you really thinking?!"

Dafa just stayed where he stood. Ducking scared when he saw the presence of several pairs of eyes were looking at him sharply. In fact, he was sure that the police officers who were outside this room also condemned his cruel actions against Mitha.

Or even worse? They condemn the existence of her who is so disgusting, sinful, and even defile the world.

Ah, Dafa began to regret having dared to do that to Mitha. If only this terrible woman had not seen him in that illicit place. If only a few days ago he had not listened to her request, he would not have entered this place he hated the most.

And also ... Mitha, the girl he liked was still alive and could live out her days as usual.

*PLAKK!!*

A sudden sensation of heat and soreness spread across the entire left cheek of Dafa after the slap. He even believed that the slap, which he felt was more like a punch, would leave a large bruise that would make him look terrible. Dafa can only be silent and not reciprocate.

He knows it's his fault too. He deserves a punishment like this. Oh, he also doesn't have to think about what kind of torture he'll receive in a holding cell, by another inmate. He had heard that the perpetrators of rape were treated very badly by the inmates in the cell. Whether it is true or not. Clearly Dafa could only imagine the worst possible outcome.

"Basic of today's teenagers. His behavior is completely insane! Not in your right mind! Put on people's children, kill them too! You shouldn't be alive!" Those sharp words easily entered his ears.

A liverache? It seems he doesn't deserve to feel that. Because his own deeds have harmed many people. From Mitha, it even included both Mitha's parents, whom she had known closely and treated her like their own child.

God fucking. Dafa couldn't even imagine how disappointed they were. He wanted to be swallowed by the earth and never come back to life. After this he was sure both of Mitha's parents would definitely scold her all out.

Argh. Truly, he was ashamed and half-dead disgusted with himself.

"Shhh! Paak, it's sir. This is not the time for you to vent anger like this."

"I don't care. My daughter would still be alive if there were no one like her!"

"Sir, remember your duty here sir."

"I must uphold justice, Mr. Thunder! If I keep quiet, then my position will be the same as theirs! I must avenge my daughter! They must suffer!"

A police officer who witnessed the incident shook his head. A little embarrassed for what his subordinates actually did. But he also has to take it. Trauma like this is not a mild thing that can be forgotten so with time.

So that he, Mr. Hendra, can only try to be patient.

"Hhh .. Pull him out of the interrogation room. We all know he's still traumatized by his son's death."

"Good, sir!" According to the policeman named Thunder with one other policeman.

Then Mr. Hendra turned to look at Ridwan, who was speechless when he saw the figure of a fat policeman who was angry was pulled by several other police members. Although at first he tried to rebel, but eventually he gave up and cried.

"Please understand our colleague who is not doing his job with professionals, sir. Three months ago, her daughter was kidnapped, raped, and murdered. Well, more or less the case is like a father. And that left such a deep wound for him that whenever there was a rape case in the region, he was the first to come forward to scold such a perpetrator." Obviously the police chief.

"Ahh .. It's okay, sir. I even agree with him. The people who want to use and take the girl's life should indeed be treated as such." Mr. Ridwan has no problem.

"Mas!"

As soon as he heard himself being called by a voice he knew so well, Mr. Ridwan turned his head quickly towards the source of the voice. Suddenly two men ran towards him. One of them is a child he did not expect would come here.

"Sinya!" Call her.

"Of!"

"Please please allow Mitha's departure ... Om can't do anything like this either." Said Mr. Ridwan who then looked down and showed the look of his sad face. He heard a slightly hoarse voice from crying for too long.

"Yes, Om. I also have no papa."

Lies. Actually if he says he's okay, it's not entirely true. Because indeed, he was still hit. Come on, what kind of man easily forgets his best friend after a few hours of his death? Natya thinks, people like that do not deserve to be considered friends.

"Ah, as you can see, the culprit has already been arrested by the police. He is Dafa. The male students who are your classmates."

Hid. It turns out that his guess is true. So the man who injected sleeping pills and raped her in that small room was Dafa. Fortunately, he managed to escape at that time. Otherwise, maybe he will also have the same fate as Mitha.

He said he heard police officers talking. Sometimes it is like asking Dafa, interrogating more precisely, then followed by comments from the police officers.

"You were told to answer, just shut up. Wh why? You scared?"

"You dare to use and play with the lives of people's children. Turn brought here, you silence a thousand languages. You've really gone too far. I don't think about it."

"Your parents educated you at home in what way? It could be until something like this happens."

Dafa seems to be overwhelmed by listening to all the questions that hit him in a row. His head was just bowed. His eyes were fixed on the tile that was currently where he was footing. Somehow the longer he stood, the room seemed to slowly suck him into a dark hole.

This room is wide in his view. But somehow his brain translated that the room was getting more and more shut and squeezed him. His chest felt tight all of a sudden.

"Why?"

*DEG!*

This sound. This sound! The voice of the person he was most afraid of right now. Of all the people in this world, why did God have to meet Natya? Mitha's best friend, who was also her ex back then? What does He think, this is the best step that can be given to him because he deserves it?

Dafa who had lowered his head earlier finally ventured to raise his head to see the whereabouts of the girl. Damnit. Turns right. Natya is here. He looks fucked. With her clothes disheveled, her lips and eyes were also quite swollen.

"N-Natya??"

Oh. He already knows how close Natya and Mitha are. Dafa thought it would be natural for Natya to react that way. Moreover, the departure of his best friend is very sudden. It must have disturbed his mental calm.

Severe guilt forced Dafa to swallow his saliva.

"Why, Daf?" Natya asked from behind the glass of the interrogation room. His voice sounded vibrating. It's like holding back to stay calm and not cursing Dafa.

But I don't know. He might soon lose his patience. Dafa knew very well how terrible the anger of patient people like Natya was. And Dafa was sure he wouldn't be able to see that.

Because of the overwhelming fear that invaded his body, Dafa could not answer.

"Why did you admit all this to Mitha? Not satisfied?"

"N-Sit-"

"When yesterday you just make me and throw me so good."

...huh?

Wait, what? Yesterday? Just wear and throw Natya away? What does Natya mean? Though he remembered, yesterday-yesterday he had never once gone outside the house and did bad things to Natya.

"B-behold, that means ap-"

"Even the cave to get pregnant because of you. You realize, what kind of damage did you make to the cave, as well as Mitha's parents, with all this?"

"W-what?! Lo ... are you pregnant?! Nat's! I swear, not the cave! Cave no-"

Oh hell. Damnit. Shitoo! Goddamn bum! He just realized it. That boy! That kid must have done that to Natya. Insolent, if only he had not been trapped in this place, maybe he could have run to meet the demon child and finish him off until he died!

"What's? Want to say it's impossible? You wanna say the cave's just a lie? Huh yeah?"

"Natya swear, Nat! That's not a cave! You must believe the same cave!"

Silent. There was not a word that Dafa could say to back up his argument. Because he thought, it would be free too. He had no clear evidence to put the boy in jail either way!

'Basic of the Hell Claw!' His mind thought of one of his enemy's biker gangs. He doesn't even like Hell Claw. Their actions are really sadistic, reliable, and not worth imitating.

"Sorry ... Natya's mom?"

While Dafa was busy with his thoughts, Natya, who was called just turned her head.

"What did you just say is true? That Dafa also raped mebak .. sorry, pregnant?"

...what-what?! Wasn't what he just said clear? Didn't he see for himself how Natya's face looked when he said that? Could he not read his gestures to be silent and believe that what he said was true? He should have thought so!

"Do you think I'm lying?" Challenge Natya who is currently turning her body to face Mr. Hendra while crossing her two hands in front of her chest.

"N-not like that. I just want to confirm."

"Sir clearly heard what I just said, right?" This time Natya's tone of voice is getting high.

"N-Natya .. don't talk that way to the police, son." Aunt Fitra this time held him from behind.

Somehow he could be in front of the woman earlier when he did not feel moved even a little from where he originally stood, namely next to Aunt Fitra. But stupid shit. He doesn't care anymore! His anger was truly unstoppable now!

"Sorry Auntie, but I still remember how she caught me first." Said Natya who then looked at Mr. Hendra cynically.

"Hhh .. that's because mbak already littered public facilities. We have made a new rule, where if you want to find a missing person, there is no need to paste the missing person's photo papers. Just report to us via our official WhassApp number or via our social media DM, mbak." The police were trying to defend him.

"I just wanted to find my sister!! My mother often forced me to look for a sister!! Otherwise, I will be punished!! I am not wrong!! I just had to!!"

'Lying .. You know you're willing to do it because it's all your fault. You were too selfish to make Bang Rizal leave the house. And recently, you found out that he had an accident and forgot his memory. It's all because of you. So it's only fitting that the police officer thinks you're wrong.'

*DEG!*

Whisper it .. he's back again. God fucking. God fucking. The hell! Why does his life now have to be broken to this extent? God, please stop! Stop whatever! Whatever ordeal you will pass down to Natya! Natya is not ready. The vow. Natya's tired.

'You are wrong ...'

No. gabe.

'You're wrong.'

Stopit!

'YOU'RE WRONG!!'

IT'S NOISY!

"ARGH!! ENOUGH'S ENOUGH!! I'M NOT WRONG!!" Shouted Natya who suddenly grabbed her own head. Then switch to hitting his head.

Everyone near Natya immediately took action to stop Natya. They actually don't really understand why Natya can react so hysterically. But for now, they prefer to ignore that and help the girl who is currently still hurting herself.

Dafa who witnessed the dramatic scene looked at Natya worried and felt guilty for not doing anything to help Natya. While others are busy calling his name so that he is aware of whatever possessed him to become like this.

"Thighfar Natya! Don't hurt yourself like this!"

"Sir Natya, please calm down."

"Natya, please stop!"

Suddenly, his stomach hurt.

*nye!*

"Aw!"

The pain managed to surprise Natya until she wanted to stop hitting herself. His body slowly fell down in a sitting position. Fortunately, Natya was still strong enough to stay sober. He held his stomach.

"Sinya!" Shouted Om Ridwan and Aunt Fitra together.

"Snat!" Dafa immediately ran towards the door and tried to get out of the interrogation room by trying to break into it. But it failed because he was stopped first by some police from outside.

"You, stay there! Don't take Natya!" Shouted Om Ridwan.

"...I just want to help-"

"WHISPER!! GO YOU!! YAAAAARGH!! YOU DICK!!" Natya's screams are not good. But his mouth closed again when the pain came back against him.

"Mom, you better take Natya's mother to her house. So that he can rest. Can you do it?"

"Ah, yes! Okay, sir!"

"Natya, come ..." Take Aunt Fitra and help Natya stand up. So did Om Ridwan.

Natya could only resignedly follow orders from nodding in between her cries. Then he was helped to walk by Aunt Fitra and left the police station with him and got into his car. While Om Ridwan, he will remain there and complete all his affairs with Dafa.

...══════ ∘◦❁◦∘ ═══════...

"It has. Now you enter your house there. You are exhausted and you need to rest. Take care of your health and your baby. Today must be so exhausting." Order Aunt Fitra from the car.

Natya who had come down from earlier could only smile wryly. But because he did not want to stay silent for too long, he finally agreed to the woman's order.

"... good Aunt." In his opinion.

"Jas. Auntie go home first! Assalamu'alaikum." Pamit the Aunt who passed away.

"Mrsa'alaikumussalam ..." The reply.

So long Natya was outside to pay attention to the back of the luxury car driven by Aunt Fitra. The car slowly moved away and disappeared from his sight.

After that, he slowly moved his feet to enter the house. His right hand slowly moved the doorknob to open the wooden object.

But once opened the door, Natya pegged in place for a moment.

The scene he was currently seeing was terrifying. Fragments of glass scattered in the living room. Not to forget some of the picture frames of his work that he had long been proud of even he found it had been shattered with glass on the floor.

His breath roared for a moment. No. gabe. No. gabe. Nay! Can't be if that happens?! His mother was joking, right?!

He then heard the sound of items being hit and broken from the inside. Accompanied by the voice of his mother's frustrated scream. Not wanting to stay in his place for long, he then ran in regardless of the open door of his house.

No. gabe. This is all a lie, right? It's all just an illusion he sees, right? Please just. Justjust please. God, just this once. Let him be happy.

But hope seems to be dashed. Because as soon as he ran in, his mother stopped her actions and turned to look at Natya with bulging eyes. His nose looked so red and swollen. So are his eyes. It was as if he had let out an unusually hysterical cry.

Natya was flabbergasted at the place where she stood for a moment.

"I ... mother?"