Hopeleslly Depend
4. the intersection of heart and mind

The only thing I know about us is,

ordinary people I get used to

we are not strangers who meet

and then fall in love at first sight

it deserves a romance movie that is crowded at watching millions of pairs of eyes

we are just a pair of hearts that already know each other and want to get to know more

we're just curious about each other

06.30

Today is a holiday that I am looking forward to, not because there is a schedule for dating or meeting friends, but it is me time. It's my time to take a break from all the fatigue over the last few days. Not a few people who spend time with themselves like me, whether it's just at home or out just to find the wind, which is important alone. By spending time alone I was also a little bit more able to know more about what Irene, how Irene is, what is being thought, what is in need right. Funny may sound when someone wants to know himself, but aren't there a lot of people out there who don't even know themselves and aren't they a little pathetic?, he does not know himself, how will he love himself?, and if he cannot love himself how can he love others?. If we want to give someone a diamond, shouldn't we also have a diamond first?.  

In short, today I have not decided what I want to do to satisfy my own desires. After waking up this morning I immediately did what I had to do in my opinion. Sweeping, cooking breakfast, and serving my beloved son.

“ mbak I was dating, not yesterday anyway, a few weeks ago exactly, right after his birthday, he said he wanted a story, maybe forgot yo, understand wes old”, he said, chirp Ashana from behind the kitchen window while putting on a mocking face.

“ you know ga ngingetin, yo I forgot, here o ta” I said indifferently.

Hearing my answer as fast as lightning, he sat down with a henchman at the dinner table like a child waiting to eat his snack.

“ how?, dikasi what? Shoes are sorry, what is the behavior? Gentlemen ga? Where is aja? What the hell is that? Modelan sexy brain ga?.” in a curious tone he catapulted all those questions like a journalist.

“ trus I answer how if you ask a lot?”, with my confused face and my hand reaching for the blender on the upper shelf, but not until.

“ fetch first”

“ so grow it up instead of to. . ga grow fat kaga high kaga” murmured while reaching for items that I can not reach.

“ yes it is the use of higher adek, to take the goods needed, let a little contribute to every cooking activity” I replied lightly.

“ sa ae lu upil ant” candles.

“isn't the mas-mas that are quite high? Big height ga anyway?” I haven't had a chance to answer the question before Ashana has added another question.

“about 169cm si, 170 an lah, which is definitely higher than me.” I answered a little while remembering.

“hilllih, girls one and a half meters more three centimeters mah easy if you find a tall guy, all guys taller than you.’’ Her shirt is without guilt.

For a moment the atmosphere became silent without any sound, if this was a movie there might already be the sound of crickets filling this void, but crickets from where early in the morning like this.

“ya how is the story confused also you ask dong, one-on-one yes ask her”.

“Nghokey, yesterday where? Exactly the name of the place, I can guess from the beginning he invited where, it reflects the nature of the bung” with his eyes that he narrowed Ashana asked as if he was carrying out his detective mission.

“Cafe&resto pride” my answer is short.

“Nghokey, he's the current kid huh? How do you want to be the same as me? Okay next question,” question Ashana stopped seeing my sour face.

“apa? I really know that was kuper, though, usually it's a contemporary child who is attracted to the cafe his taste is not much different from him what else he came also ngajak kkan friends ya can be said half show off, please, sampean beautiful anyway, but, yes ga kekinian” explained Ashana who I answered with a flat smile.

“nghoke second question, how is his treatment? How level is he? Well ordinary first of all it is still sweet anyway do not know later, please answered”

“ya well anyway, yesterday also known to his friends, kek he did not want to make that wall between me he was with his friend” obviously I was short.

“This, the answers that smell bucin, try to be more specific” the door.

“ yes he if chatting kek bridging gitu you know, so let keep connecting us, will I the same never met before nya” explained me once again.

        Ashana was silent for a moment, perhaps she was astonished. A person who is not interested in a relationship after a long time is suddenly in the kasmaran phase.

“don't fly first you know, I'm not quite sure anyway, how old is the difference?” with a wry tone Ashana asked again.

“ Difference 4 years anyway, why?”

“ya not sure aja, because he is very present you know, would like to hang out, and at that age also already his age guys should think marriage anyway?”

The silent atmosphere was back again, only the sound of a blender working to destroy the seasoning until it became one and smooth filled the room.

“don't say he is also a hobby of playing to the club, if you know, definitely not very like, oya cigarette, ga ngerok right?, you don't like that asep cigarette” he continued.

“No, calm aj” in my heart also immediately felt like, why do I deny?, whereas what Ashana said was true. Was I really so hopeful that I tried to cover up Ian's ugliness?.

“shana, if he doesn't meet expectations, then I'm worried about how?” ask me moody.

“ ya so do not expect, anyways, notya it's usual jalau ya in staying with her idol nge-date?” Canda Ashana's.

“ga need to be upset if that guy is still a lot, then, after all, from the past also uda created his package Adam same eve maybe there will be nothing to the jodo” said Ashana this time a little to calm me.

“ Nghoke, now buy in chilli bentar sana”

“heh?!, Is that right? Ih ga really exciting sih” murmured while out buying chili I asked.

And as I wish, today I spend my days sitting at home, watching the drama from noon to evening, playing with my adorable feather kids and always wanting to be loved by the black Duck and the white Poci, a concert in the bathroom while lifting up all the dead skin that weighs on life, and that night we had a little chat with Ashana and Dad about random stuff. Forgetting my feelings and going through my time as usual, I was already quite happy.