LET ME FEEL THE HYPERNOVA
Cosmic Dust

Jojo worked as a reporter at KNJ News, a news broadcasting program from KNJtv for 2 years. Since childhood his dream of becoming a writer, in addition to books, he also channeled his imagination on bed linen, tablecloths, glass, cabinets, and anything that was seen was still "empty". Growing up everything changed, the presence of the woman whose father brought in during the heavy rain 7 years ago named Sophia, the birth of Ranoar, the death of the father, the disappearance of Sophia, to be dumped by her first love, until dumped by her first love, leaving Jojo mentally devastated, bad things happen as if there is no stopping.

After the death of his father, Jojo became the backbone of the family, giving up his desire to continue his studies until Nara graduated high school, lucky Nara got a scholarship at the best university in Jogja, Jogja, so Jojo can set aside money from his part-time work for his own tuition. The departure of his father really made him slump, not only tormenting him with resentment due to the presence of Ranoar, but, also makes him regret because his father left without knowing how much longing and unfortunately in spite of all the wounds that were ever scratched.

After losing his father, his first love since High School named Akas also left. The only human Jojo believes in, the one who recharges his battery with only half a smile, the man he desperately needs to lean on.

"I have a dream" Akas said at the time, in an open-air cafe.

"I am too." Reply Jojo, then put a finger biscuit in his mouth.

"I want to make it happen," Akas said again in a flat voice.

Jojo smiled at her, glancing at Akas' older sister, Ranti, who was sitting between them. Jojo smiles confidently, his thoughts leading to the meeting of two families as Akas' only dream has always been heralded since High School. Indeed, since Akas worked he became busier and rarely agreed on requests for dating, but Jojo believes behind the longing that was stifled, stored good goals in it. Jojo shrugged his shoulders high, preparing to hear the good news.

"I want to make it happen, but how do I say it?"

"Forget, why confused? We're gonna make it together." Jojo again commented a smile, grasping Akas' hand tightly.

"Ekhem... It seems like you guys need some space, should I go?" As if to understand what a couple needs for things like this.

"No need, sit down, I want you to hear it too" Akas said.

I let out a deep breath, "Joo. I will make it happen myself," he said restrained.

"You have the right to do it because it's your dream..."

"Without you!" Say akas, swallow the sweat.

Jojo raised his head, but his hand was still playing Akas' fingers.

"What kind of dream is there without me in it?"

"I want to break up!"

The eyes of Jojo and Ranti were crying out, they were both shocked while wondering if they had not misheard.

Jojo took off his hand, looking at Akas innocently.

"All right." The answer was calm and smiling. Seeing Jojo smile, Akas also smiled, also relieved, he was happy if Jojo quickly understood his wishes.

But before long Jojo giggled, hitting Akas' arm slowly.

"Then you thought you could live without me? You think you won't be tormented when my name keeps getting stuck in your head? I love you and you love me more, let's make another joke."

Jojo doesn't care about Akas' words, he feels he knows Akas more than anyone.

"I'm really serious. Joo, let's break up!"

"Hey, don't joke," Ranti clapped on Akas' shoulder.

"You're just thinking a lot" Jojo said.

"I'm serious!" Said Akas high-pitched this time.

"Sister, you know how I am, we weren't born to rich parents, our lives weren't so smooth, it was always sad, but I had plenty of time, I have a chance to live better. I can't spend my time just on love affairs like this. I'll focus on my goals now." Repet Akas, leaving Jojo stunned. Ranti was also down to hear it.

"Isn't life like that? It doesn't always go the way we want." Jojo replied, starting to not understand why.

"Bored feelings sometimes arise, I understand them, you can calm yourself first."

"You understand me more than anyone, I got a better job that I believe can lift my family's economy. I really want to focus now."

Ranti raised her head, "I see now, you're trying to get up, that's what you mean?" I was silent, did not answer, but Ranti knew very well what her sister wanted because she felt the problems they both faced.

"Then do it, do what you want, do it for your future. Focus without thinking about anything else."

Jojo's mouth was soaring in the wind, his presence there was as if invisible, they were talking about future plans without him as if he was a person who did not hear there.

"I.. Then what about me?" Jojo asked half in disbelief.

"Joo, right now, that's not what's important, my sister wants bigger things you can support her, right?"

"Yes. So far you've fought a lot because you rarely meet, breaking up is the best way."

Jojo glared at Ranti, he increasingly did not understand the way of his brother Akas' mind, how could someone think this selfish? Jojo did not reply to Ranti, lazy.

"Did I do you wrong? Just say it as usual. Or is my appearance no longer attractive? Or do you need some time to calm down a little bit? I'm sorry, my family, your family, what are we gonna tell them? This ring, what do you think it's for?"

This relationship is not a relationship that can be cut off just like that, the ring on Jojo's ring finger is Akas' promise to him, it is not wrong if he billed the promise that Akas wanted to convey to his parents.

I was silent, none of Jojo's questions answered. After closing his eyes, he woke up from his stool.

"Enough, we're done here!" He said and turned his body.

Jojo wakes up, while Ranti will come wherever Akas will step.

"We're not finished!" Jojo did not accept.

"Joo, there's a lot of people here, don't embarrass Akas!"

Jojo held back his tears so that his chest felt so tight, usually Akas' back looked pleasant if he turned around after driving him home, this time it looked like the back of a coward who mocked him.

"You forgot what you said? You asked me not to be far from you. Me too! I got a job in a big company, you said you didn't want me to be liked by other guys, so long as I wasn't going anywhere you'd always be there for me. I turned down the job for you..."

"Then that's the wrong way? You rejected it yourself!" Ranti cried until many people turned to look at them.

"All of our memories, our four years, are you just going to leave him alone? Answer me!" Jojo said it with a trembling voice, even though he wanted to see Akas's face, eager to discover the lie of the parting on that face.

I turned around and looked into his eyes, but still did not answer anything.

"Let Akas be happy with his decision! You take care of yourself while you live better..."

"Hey! Shutup!" Jerk Jojo who could not stand it anymore, making Ranti raise her chest.

"Hey? You said hey? You barked me?" Ranti pushes Jojo's shoulder so that Jojo is not strong and sheds her tears.

"Sister, I'm sorry, that's not what I mean." he whispered.

"I just found out you're being disrespectful!" Ranti continued to push Jojo every time her mouth let out a word.

"Look, Akas' life is not yours! You're nobody to ask him to stay by your side. How lucky God is to show your true nature."

"K-sister.." Jojo's voice faltered, he was downcast while crying in tears. Ranti did not stop in the slightest despite seeing Jojo helpless, snapping in front of the other visitors.

"You feel worthy of Akas? Even four years would be meaningless if there was something better than you!"

"So you've been pretending to be polite and fun all along? How ridiculous! I won't regret leaving you, his life would be better off without a burden like you..."

"Don't stop!!!" Jojo yells. Both hands had gathered a lot of energy to push back Ranti, but Akas caught and pushed her down.

Bruuk!!

Jojo silently stared, his gaze was empty, the voice of ridicule that still came out of Ranti's mouth was not heard, only a desperate breath from her mouth. I pushed him, it was like a dream!

I've been angry, ever upset, never nagged, but never like this. Never did he want to leave let alone in this way. Akas is the pedestal of the weight of the load on Jojo's head, his resting place, Akas is a tree, a green plant, flowers, wind, or its bright blue sky. Akas is everything that gives comfort, what happens if he also goes?

Jojo could not think much, looking at Akas's foot that would step making his hand stretch out and pull Akas' palm from below, trying to hold back the footsteps that would soon leave him. His mind is messed up, whatever just happened Jojo doesn't want to think about it anymore, he just doesn't want Akas to leave and wants to fix everything.

"We shouldn't be like this, I'm sorry. I'll be more patient waiting for our happy day, I won't keep asking to meet. Let's make your dreams come true together... em?" He said softly with a raucous voice, his eyes were full of tears, his hair was also messy even though he did not fight with Ranti. All that was enough to describe how he begged Akas to keep choosing him.

"I'm leaving."

It was all that was heard, no answer, no lies on Akas' face. What comes out of Jojo's mouth is very simple, namely the question you want answers to, the reasons you want to understand. Meaningless adieu leaves more pain than the real reason that may not be pleasant to hear.

Jojo is a Pluto who came out of the family of the solar system, lost from circulation, his life flying in space, avoiding and getting hit by a meteoroid hundreds of times. He stops orbiting when his world with Akas ends. The pain from his father seemed to come back and doubled. The cosmic dust is growing, polluting the universe, making it cold and numb.

No matter how many people watched it, no matter what they thought, Jojo cried loudly under the green grass, his chest so tight that it was gulped.

Tuk.. tuk... tuk.. crisp sound of footsteps approaching towards him, parked on the grass where he dropped tears, a man crouched down in front of Jojo, looking at him pity, he said, and covered Jojo's body with his black jacket.

...***...