Penance (I'm a Sinner)
Chapters 15.

Everyone is looking forward to the answer from Good. 

Kiyai Yusuf asked again because he still saw Good silent and did not answer. Good to keep his head down. He took a long breath. After a moment of thought, Good finally replied. He looked towards Kiyai Yusuf and Ayesha. 

"May it be good to answer later, Kiyai? Because this is so sudden and Good still has no thought of it. So give it a good thought in these few days." Pinta Bagus to Kiyai Yusuf and Ayesha. 

Kiyai Yusuf finally wanted to give time to Bagus. "All right, I'll give you some time to think. However, only until the time is up. On the first day of fasting is the time to give an answer."

"All right, Kiyai."

Kiyai Yusuf also told Bagus to taste the snack cake and tea that has been served. They also enjoy together. Aisyah was actually a bit disappointed because Bagus was still delaying giving an answer, but Aisyah realized this was indeed so sudden for Bagus. Aisha was patiently waiting. 

After a long time, Good was parting. After Good left, Aisyah cleaned the table. Kiyai Yusuf went to his room. Suci approached Asiyah who was washing the used glass of tea earlier and the small plate where the snack cake had been. 

"How, Aisyah? just okay?" holy Look to Aisha. 

"Unanswered. Good to ask for time. Am I not good enough for Mas Bagus?" Aisyah finished washing and gazed towards the Sacred. 

Sacred immediately shook his head, "No, Aisyah. You are beautiful, gentle, kind and godly, whoever makes you a wife will be happy."

"Then, what makes Mas Bagus not answer directly, yes?" Aisha was thinking. 

Both Aisha and Saints did not know. Good delayed the answer, they didn't understand. Aisha said goodbye to Saints, she wants to teach junior santri children. Go Asiyah leave the Saints alone.

The saint pensive himself. He's so confused. She was also sad to see Asiyah who seemed to be holding back her grief. It seemed that Asiyah was looking forward to a good answer. In another place, Nice was so unsettled. He was sitting in the room alone. Zaki who had just arrived in the room, immediately approached Nice. 

"Why are you, Gus? There's a problem, huh?"

"No." It's good not to want anyone to know first, because he still hasn't decided anything. 

Zaki scratched his nape that was not itchy, he passed and went to take a bath because it was late afternoon. 

***

Tomorrow.

Good as always waiting for Saints. They learn to teach every afternoon. Last night off because Bagus had to go to Kiyai Yusuf's house which eventually ended with an arranged marriage. However, Holy afternoon has not yet arrived. Though all day from last night until now Bagus continues to fidget thinking about the matchmaking thing. It is good to meet with Saints to tell stories with Saints. 

After a long time, the Saints arrived. Saints actually no longer want to teach together with Good. He wanted to keep his distance, but he was not feeling good either to Bagus. Finally the Saints came. The Saints gave their greetings and Good answered the Holy Greetings. The two looked at each other. Saints immediately sat down and Bagus sat in front of him. They also began teaching together. 

Today it is nice to wear the koko clothes bought by Aisyah. Actually from earlier Suci had noticed the cocoa clothes. He could instantly realize that it was the clothes that Asiyah bought, because they bought together so Saints could sign. Seeing Good wearing Aisyah's clothes made Suci think, Don't-don't Good accept the matchmaking. Suddenly the Holy heart became troubled. 

They finally finished teaching. Good looking towards the Holy with a straight look. Saints want to leave, but Good asks Saints not to go. 

"I'm saying goodbye first, Ustadz."

"Wait a minute, sit down first, Saints."

The saint finally sat down, "What's up, Ustadz?"

"I want to tell you something, Saints."

"Say." Saints wonder what Good wants to say. 

"I think you heard it too, right. At that time Suci was also in the house of Kiyai Yusuf. I'm betrothed to Aisyah." Good to keep his head down. 

Nyuts. Saints feel the pain in him. However, Saints tried to keep smiling. 

"Congratulations, yes." Sacred reached out a hand, but she retracted her hand. He forgot that Good did not come into contact with the opposite sex.

Good looking towards the Holy. 

"You congratulate me, Saints?"

"Yes, Ustadz. Ustadz will be lucky to have a wife like Aisha." Sacred smiled faintly. 

"But my heart is hesitating."

"Loh, why? Aisha is a good girl."

"I know she's a good and godly girl, but my heart has been given to others, even though I don't know how she feels about me." Good looking towards the Holy. 

"Whoever Ustadz chooses will be lucky."

"Then you're alone, Saints?"

"You don't want to get married and pick someone, do you?"

"Oh. Who would want to be with someone like me. A girl of many sins like this, Ustadz. I'm self-conscious of my flaws." The saint lowered his head. 

"I also had many previous Holy sins."

"meaning?" The saint frowned. 

Good to tell stories. Previously he was a thug and a begal. Likes people and sometimes robbing. So many sins and mistakes. He used to be not a righteous young man, not as he is now, because of an unexpected encounter with Kiyai Yusuf then the fate of Good changed. Once when Bagus was doing a sharp action, he got a stab in his stomach. He was lying in the street asking for help, but no one cared.

Coincidentally Kiyai Yusuf appeared and saw the appalling condition of Bagus. Kiyai Yusuf helped him, taking Bagus to the hospital. Good is also included. The hospital cost Kiyai Yusuf to pay. Well healed and taken to the pesantren. Kiyai Yusuf gave Good advice until the door of his heart opened. It is good to ask for forgiveness and repent. He eventually becomes Kiyai Yusuf's disciple and leaves behind his dark past. 

After a long time, Bagus was appointed by Kiyai Yusuf to be one of the teachers in the pesantren. Kiyai Yusuf saw that Bagus was better and fit to be a teacher. It was also a very righteous young man, so Kiyai Yusuf had the intention to match Bagus with Aisyah. 

That's a nice short story. The Saints listen carefully. He just found out a good story. He thought from the beginning Good was a righteous young man, it turned out to have a dark past too.

"So it's so Holy. My name is Bagus Pratama, but my past is not as good as mine, right?"

"Hem, like me huh, Ustadz? My name is Suci Syahputri. My name is Holy, but I am not my name. I also had so many sins before. Ustadz must remember how I used to be."

"Well, we also have a dark past, Holy. So don't look down on yourself, yeah."

The saint smiled and understood the words Good. He admired the mature, virtuous and kind Good. 

"Every man has his own sins, Holy. No one is perfect, for perfection belongs only to Allah SWT. We as humans can only try our best. God also determines."

"Yes, Ustadz."

"Therefore we must worship and repent, so as not to fall into sin in the past again." Nice added. 

The saint nodded his head. Good to take a long breath. He has told me a lot and still hasn't said his point. 

"Holy, do you think that this kind of me would be a good match for Aisyah?"

"It sure fits, Ustadz."

"When you?"

"Huh? me? how me?" Sacred wonder. 

The two looked at each other in silence. No more words. Only the two spoke to each other through their eyes. Mata Bagus seemed to say that in his heart there is only Saints, while Saints as if his eyes said whether Good likes him. However, this cannot. If so, then Ayesha will be hurt. 

The Saints did not want to hurt Aisha's heart. He did not want to see Aisyah heartbroken. Good was equally unwilling to disappoint Kiyai Yusuf, but if Suci also liked him then Good would fight for him. 

The two were silent for a long time. Saints finally stood up, Good was the same as standing. Good to be confused with Sacred actions. The saint felt he had to leave now. It's not good if the two of them stay together for a long time. However, Good blocked the Sacred move. 

"Sacred Wait! What about you and me  ...."

The Saints immediately stopped saying Good, "No, Ustadz!! Aisyah deserves better and fits you!!"

"Then why were you crying, Saints? crying because I heard my match with Aisha or something else. I saw you cry, Saints." Nice face turned sad. Good thought Saints had the same feelings as him. 

"I ...." 

The saint was confused as to what to say. He realized that he was also in love with Good. However, there will be a hurt heart and a disappointed heart if he says love is good. The saints chose silence. 

"I love you, Holy." It is good to confess his feelings to the Saints. Sacred was startled and stared at Bagus with tears that then flowed down her cheeks. 

Seriate.

By : Libra Author. 

FB: Libra Author

IG: @libra_aja0k3

Tiktok: Libra (Blue Sapphire) @libraoke1

Continue to support this work, brother, love like and comment yes. All Favorite, 5-star love and gift too. Thanks 🙏🙏 Happy running fast worship 🙏🤗

🍀🍀🍀🍀