The Passion of a Student
Chapter 5: The Loss

May be young, incompetent, ugly, not strong in bed, as long as not poor. Poverty is life's worst problem. People can remain happy despite being ugly, not strong, incompetent, but not with poor.

Warman feels guilty for Rahma. That's what made him cancel his short date. She paid for it, then left. Warman doesn't know what to do. He looks confused. How he will find Rahma again, and Rahma has gone away.

Maybe Rahma really doesn't want to see Warman anymore. Rahma may be filthy, sinful, unclean, and will be burned in hell, but she still expects the holy, clean, devout Warman, religious, and most importantly not even touched by women. That's the ideal Warman in Rahma's eyes.

But time continued to move forward, while Warman was still silently staring at the confusion. Rahma had gone as far away as she could; towards a place that Warman would likely not touch. There is no chance for Warman to find Rahma. That way, their relationship is done. Completely finished, there will be no chance of return.

Warman who had just been silent, now, as if finding a way how he could meet Rahma. He will look for her in the places Rahma used to visit when she was sad. It was a brilliant idea, which suddenly came like inspiration. But the sinful Warman felt it was not inspiration, but a whisper of the devil. Which God might inspire this sinful servant, his inner being. Thinking about inspiration alone makes himself creepy, feel uncomfortable and disgusted with him. But then he calmed himself, thinking: God does not bestow good only upon his obedient servant. God is loving and loving.

Warman continues his search. Enter him in a mini-campus forest park, which later becomes smaller due to endless development. As far as Warman this is where Rahma used to reflect on the problems of his life. Seeing the collapsed buildings, destroyed, flat with the ground makes him entertained, because he does not feel crushed alone. That is life, nothing is eternal. Everything will be destroyed, he thought. The construction of beautiful new buildings also gave him a reflective contemplation: perhaps that is how life, falls and crumbles, and then wakes up again to be even greater.

At Rahma's favorite Burjo, Warman asks, "Mang, has Rahma been here all day?" Because the palanggan remained, the Mamang became acquainted with Rahma. Mamang also repeatedly asked Warman about Rahma who never looked at her nose again, every time Warman visited.

"Where to know, he may not be in Semarang anymore" replied Mamang.

Warman surrendered. On the way home, she meets Sarwati. But, the meeting was only a short one passed; warman was not willing to be preoccupied with the unnecessary burden of pleasantries.

Sarwati is confused, feeling herself shunned. That makes him sad. But whatever he is, only the level younger brother who is ge-er-an likes his level brother. Basically Warman who has turned into a bastard, he does not want to care about the feelings of his younger brother.

But..