Marrying Mother's Mother's Mother
Chapter 56. The Past of Embers

All the way from the hospital to Bara's residence was only silent. The couple chose silence. I don't know, both of them with their own thoughts.

He focused on the steering wheel in his hand, concentrating on the streets. Bella is seen staring out the window, looking at other motorists who are downstream passing their cars.

“Bell, I'm sorry. Have not opened my past story,” said Bara, suddenly stopped his car not too far from the city park.

“Yes, Mas,” Bella replied briefly, still at home looking at the passing vehicle.

“Rania and Issabell have different meanings for me, even though they both call me Daddy.”

This time Bella averted her eyes, staring at Bara in wonder. In addition, he did not understand the meaning of Bara's sentence.

“For me Issabell my biological daughter, using my family name. Unlike Rania,” continued Bara.

“Means, Mas?”

“I don't really want to open my ex-wife's disgrace. But this is for our relationship. After this, assume you heard nothing.”

Bara sighed, it seemed heavy to tell her about the past wounds. However, he wants to start a serious household with Bella. And that past story must be reopened, retelling it as a form of honesty and openness. So that later in life does not backfire for their household.

“My ex-wife, Brenda. Rania, her biological daughter with a man who won't be identified by my ex-wife. But that's right.” Bara started telling stories.

“As long as I was married to Brenda, Rania became my daughter. But after the divorce, I'm not who I am anymore. Including not his father Rania anymore, but I have no right to forbid a child to stop calling and consider me Daddy,” explained Bara.

Bella was surprised, not expecting. Seeing the interaction of Bara and Rania, like there is an inner bond between father and son between the two. However, Bara's speech is contrary to what has just been seen.

“When I divorced her mother, only left a light kiss on Rania's forehead which was only three years old at the time.”

“I have no responsibility whatsoever to Rania, not contacting her as well for almost ten years now. I cut ties, and so did my ex-wife. We avoided each other. In fact, when we have to cross paths somewhere, we do not recognize each other,” continued Bara.

“Mas, that bad, huh?” ask Bella.

“Worse than that. Maybe if we don't split up, we'll kill each other.”

Bella was surprised to return. It feels strange, two people who used to love each other, living together. Why you can hate each other.

“Brenda is my schoolmate, we were in a relationship in High School. Next I went to college in America, Brenda in Jakarta.”

Bara was speechless, it felt really hard to open the wounds of his past.

“On that trip, both my parents died in an accident. After finishing college, I finally chose to go home to continue the company that was almost destroyed. The company my parents started. And steadied myself to marry my lover, Brenda.”

“At that time, I only had Brenda. But, when I came to see her, she already had a daughter, Rania. A year old. During my time in America, Brenda had an affair,” Bara said, closing her eyes.

“And Mas keep marrying her?” bella asked, but she knew the answer.

“The stupid thing I did first. But at that moment I needed support. I'm only 25 years old.”

“In my downfall, I only had Brenda. And he, with the condition of single parent also needs someone who sustains his life and Rania.”

“We married for a reason we call love, trying to accept each other's shortcomings.”

Bara massaged his temple.

“I hope she changes after marriage. But as it turns out, once cheated on her, she would still cheat again.”

He put his head on the steering wheel of the car. Considering stupidity.

“A year married, Brenda cheated again. Not with one man, there are many men in his life.”

“A year I struggled to make it back, but couldn't. I divorced her in the second year of our marriage,”, Bara said slowly.

“Mbak Brenda is married again?” ask Bella in doubt.

“I don't know clearly and don't want to know the truth. I don't take care of his life anymore. But according to Stella, Brenda is still alone.”

“Never cheat, Bell. That's hurtful. I was thinking of not getting married again,” said Bara slowly.

Bella looked to the side, looking at Bara who closed her eyes, but from the corner of her eyes appeared a tear that fell on the temple.

“Mas, you why?”

“At the time you see your loved ones cheating in plain sight.” He was silent, pausing for a moment.

“At the time of your wife, who every night is in your arms. But, in the afternoon it was in the arms of another man. Sharing a bed with another man. If I can ask God, I don't want to be given the chance to see his affair directly,” Bara said, shaking, trying to contain his feelings.

“Mas ...." Bella gently patted her husband's arm, wiping away the tears that ran down Bara's temple.

“That shadow will appear constantly in your life, Bell. And it took a long time to make peace.”

“Mas ... deeply love Mbak Brenda?” bella asked, biting her lower lip.

“At that time, I loved her very much. She's where I share my grief, where I lean in when I'm down. I only have it in this world. I entrusted my life to her. Struggling for his happiness,” Bara opened his eyes. Staring at Bella who was looking at him tearfully.

For the first time, Bella hears Bara loves someone. And it came out straight from her husband's own lips.

And what makes Bella want to cry is the pain, when hearing Bara's love confession. Even if it's the past, somehow it feels painful. Different taste when Bella saw the photos of her husband with Rissa. Different sick, when he heard Bara say that he had slept with Rissa.

The pain that Bella felt at this time, like being stabbed by thousands of daggers right in her heart. What else see the tears. From there it has been seen how much love Bara for his ex-wife.

“And to forget that love, Mas chose to leave this city and to Surabaya?” ask Bella again.

“Yes, and I've been around until now because of Mom. There is no Mother, no Barata Wirayudha in this world. I used to wear too much feeling. And now I'm not going to use my feelings. I am afraid of the pain,” said Bara.

Yes, Bella remembers, her mother once told her, at the beginning of her meeting with Bara. The man who was her husband now, at that time was very fragile. In fact, if there is no mother, Bara will end her life.

At that time Bella was a child, she was only 9 years old. Don't understand anything. At that time, his family was still in ruins. They used to live in a mansion, but the death of their father made their lives change drastically. No more beautiful dresses, Hello Kitty room with her favorite doll. All gone in the blink of an eye.

Mom takes him and Rissa lives in a cramped rented house. Their luxury home was confiscated by the bank along with its contents. Remaining personal equipment. Even those that are still good, must be sold for daily needs.

Rissa was about to finish high school. Her brother did not feel life was too difficult for too long. After finishing school, Rissa immediately went to Jakarta.

And their family was lucky to meet Bara at that time. Bella and Rissa can continue their education because of Bara. Before long, they moved out of a narrow contract, inhabiting one of the rooms in the Bara residence,

Take a meal and stay. In exchange, Bella used to help her mother take care of Bara's mansion every time she went home from school.

“Bell, forgive Rania's attitude earlier. Poor boy,” said Bara suddenly, shifting the topic of discussion.

“Why, Mas?” ask Bella curious.

“He seems to have lost the figure of a father. I limit myself to meeting her or being too close to her. I reasoned whenever Rania asked to meet,” explained Bara.

“Why doesn't Mas want to get too close to Rania?” ask Bella again.

“I don't want to involve my life too far with Brenda's life. And Rania is part of Brenda's life.”

“Rania just met me a few months ago. I accidentally met Stella, and my ex-sister-in-law begged me to meet Rania.”

Bella's getting confused.

“Should have forgotten me. When I left her, she was only three years old. But Stella and my former in-laws always introduce Rania, if I'm her daddy.”

***

T B C

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