Those Who Want My Body
Good News and Bad News

The doctor started putting the ultrasound device over my stomach, moving it slowly to the right and to the left.

"The fetal heart is already visible, just because it's only the sixth week the fetus has not been seen. But don't worry, this is common. Usually the fetus begins to be seen at the age of eight weeks and above." The doctor shows a circle on the USG computer screen.

"Alhamdulillah. Long enough wait, God finally allowed me to get pregnant doc." Tears that had been blocked, now flowed without feeling.

"And this is why Aishwa's mother was a little difficult to get pregnant before." The doctor showed me another circle larger than my fetal sac.

"What is doc?" I'm starting to get worried.

"In the ovaries there may be cysts. Left and right. Size is quite large. 3.4 cm for the left, and 3.15 cm for the right."

"Astaghfirullah." My happy news today turned out to be accompanied by news that stifled my chest.

Because, I often whine even angry at Anwar mas because of his unhealthy diet. In fact, what makes it difficult for us to have children is me. I'm the problem one.

'I'm sorry Anwar.' Those words I can't say.

My tears were flowing faster than before, my throat was choked. Even to swallow it feels difficult.

"Is this dangerous, doc?" My words sound soft.

"Depending on Aishwa's own situation and condition. It can be dangerous, it can also be harmless. If the patient is not pregnant, I would suggest removing the cyst, to prevent the cyst from getting bigger."

"Then what should I do Doc? While the doctor himself knew that this pregnancy was very much what I wanted."

"There are several types of cysts. These are functional cysts and cysts that are malignant or can be said to be tumors. Functional cysts contain fluid or blood whereas tumors usually contain abnormally growing teeth and hair. For my own case, I think this is a functional cyst. These cysts can shrink because these cysts grow as a result of hormonal imbalance. For now all you need to do is live with a good diet, get enough rest, do not stress and try to exercise lightly. This is to help the fetus to grow and develop properly."

Hearing the doctor's explanation, my feelings that had been unfazed, slowly began to calm down. After I finished the examination, I returned to the pharmacy room.

"How's Aish's checkup?" Amy sounded very curious.

"Alhamdulillah, congratulations. Good luck, you and the baby." Amy's hug makes me calmer.

"But..."

"But what's Aish?" Ms. Neneng was curious.

"The doctor told me that in the left and right ovaries there are cysts that are quite large, even larger than the fetal sac." I'm looking down lethargic.

Amy, Ms. Neneng and others encouraged me and prayed for me and my future son.

Once finished cleaning up after the event, some staff went home except those who entered the night shif.

I came home earlier than Anwar. I deliberately haven't told Mas Anwar about my pregnancy. I want to surprise him.

Deg. I stood there for a moment.

'The package is coming again.' I murmured in my heart.

When I lifted the package, it wasn't as heavy as before. No, even it seems like this time it's empty.

I put the package on the table. I dare not open it alone.

When I went into the room, it turned out that Anwar did not bring his laptop.

I ventured to open the surveillance footage. I was surprised to see who was recorded putting the package in front of the house.

"So all this time, he's the one? So Anwar already knows about this? Why did Anwar lie that the package never came again, when it turned out that the package was there every day?" My worry returned to make my heart unsettled.