Give Me the Freedom of Choice
love in the struggle

it is difficult to enjoy living a new life, Susana and the all-new conditions in life, and here is the beginning of all things ,,,

I am only a mother of my children, and it is hard to be healthy, and the happiness of the children is paramount to me, i

my middle age, , is no longer about my life that I struggle with, but the growth and happiness of children that have always been in my mind,,

after moving to a house that is very, very far from the word decent, and here I live the real meaning of life, where we already have no savings,, and here I live the real meaning of life,,there are only a few debts from the bank, in our hearts may we and we always give health, may this difficult time pass quickly,,,,,,, may we,,,,,some neighbors and relatives took us to move to this very simple house, after they came home, the little one cried, saying,, mah, mah, , 'let us go home,,, 'ayo mah,,dedek do not want to sleep here,,ayo come home to us (home with rented intent), Karana d there they d lahiran and d big right they feel at home Karana where it is crowded,,,many friends,,, good, here (d simple house, quiet, blom know friends)

I don't know how long this will last it's very difficult for me to persuade and put her to sleep, but I think I'm very tired of undergoing her,,,when everyone was asleep it turned out that I was the one who was very hard to sleep,, thronging in the ears when my two orders said we would come to visit your house ,,,someday if we already have enough windfall for the cost of pleasure and sadness to mix into one that happens even tears,,,,,, and,,,

yes, only a few days we occupied this house bad news came, the phone rang the message that the father had exhausted the ration since the father began to lose his vision,,,,, the,,,with anxiety and sadness ,, impatiently waiting for tomorrow,,,

I also asked my husband for permission to visit and look directly at the father,,,

dad asked for him to have surgery because he still wanted to see,, apparently consult a doctor,,,mr. still blom can d operation d Karana will be sick complications that suffered his last few years together ,, the end of his father ngedrop,,, the operation t delay,,,,,,, the,,,,,

after my malaku, some of the treatment of his condition has begun to stabilize, and the doctor preached the father can already d the operation,,, together on the wedding day kluaraga we are his own grandchildren,,,,,, and,,,

given the condition of the father who has been ,, long enough he wants d operation so that he can see again,,,at the end of his family decided to accept the advice of doctors to immediately d surgery even though in fact everyone's mind again no one pokus, any where not,,,last night Sister-in-law and her two children were our father,, having a motorcycle accident, keesok his day of marriage contract ponakan ,, and the schedule of the operation of the father,,,we are confused what steps to take, no one can be delayed given the condition of the father,, difficult to be stable,/normal

after you've finished the surgery and the doctor's permission to go home, and will be in control for the next week

you call me, you come back to Jakarta, you're getting better, you're healthy, you've got a lot of business, you've just got a few days to go home, , , you know ,,there are still many items that are blom d open from pekingan ,, blom again there are still some goods d house contract, which must immediately d empty right ,,,yeah, that's how my brain fills up in that d,,,, that's,,,

as with the eyes of the father, when I change the bandage, he says the father uda began to be able to see a little - but still blurred his word,, he pointed , that,,,, that,,,this is guessing yes pointing at my son,, yes, because he has never seen my second child, since birth we blom back home when it was my second child aged 2 years,,,,, since ,,,,

with real sadness, she still misses the family, especially Mr. Mak, but I have to decide to return to Jakarta with some of our relatives,,,, and,,,because we already do not have enough money for the cost, like it was the father's intention so that we return Tampa must be confused thinking about the cost of the bus

but what power until the time of control even the father can not see,,,the doctor explained that because the eye nerve of the father has been damaged due to the glucom that suffered SE times even the surgery had no effect still he could not see,,,father was very disappointed several times he delivered his disappointment that made anyone who heard him, who,

once in Jakarta,, as usual the day I passed, taking care of 2 children with a myriad of household chores,, and here in this house I like to guess family life,,,,, and,,,as a nomad away from both parents kluaraga,, day after day after day I always change the process of grief. tetep must d live,,,

two years later ,,,,,, the ,,,,,

cring,,,kring,, mobile phone ringing ,,, sho,, halo,,, assalamualaikum,,,,, it's, uh, the father of the sick,,,as good as you are with your husband and children come home old father has often been sick,,, SE sometimes fond of his heart go home on this leaflet that will not be long again,,,,

ouh yes mbk,, this prayer so that there is a fortune we can go home in Lebaran this time,,,,.....

that's more or less the essence of our conversation, in addition to other news,,,

the afternoon came ,,,

bang,,, he answered the husband,,, and there was a call from the village,, father is sick,, he told us to go home,,, Yes bang SE times we go home after the Eid holiday yes,,,now it's my sister's already school if it's not a school holiday /lebaran where can go home, that's how I get to mean my desire nan,,,,,, that's,,,

we now have many dependents ,, a lot of time debts yes want to go home, where, money from, , that's how my husband gave me various reasons, yes I understand ,,, that's how my husband gave me ,,,very understand SE time ,, the color only I can understand the current state and condition of my family,,

arrived the month of the romadhon just a few days, as usual if the intention had to go home already had to think about the problem of tickets,, other problems as his,,,, the,,,

sis jd do not want to pull this leafan asked one of my sisters,, kalo so it has started to have to boking tickets nich tar run out,,,,,, so,,, ouh ya tar ya I was informed again about her I blom talking to your brother, that's my reason,,, the time of the feast is just a few days away,,,,,, that's why I'm so, I'm here,,,I also decided to give news to my kluaraga so that they do not expect always our arrival to the village ,....

Mak,,, father, I'm sorry for this time we can go home,, and because of a reason, , yes the reason is my husband's permission ,,,but it's just in my heart, because there's no way I'm telling you like that,,, but God willing HBS Lebaran we're going home Uda's fare is a bit cheap,, that's my answer,,,,, that's,,,yes, my family understands my interests very well, only they understand all the macem my reasons