Rashi & Its Bucins
7

...Where do I find you, the longing that I miss? ...

...♔...

"Nightmare?"

Rashi nods as justification for Rasya's question being slammed by reality. He did not want to remember a single dream until he slapped his soul for immediate amnesia.

Not making room for any shadow to come, Rashi who had finished crying also moved away from Rasya. A little embarrassed because he was caught crying in front of Abah too.

They don't say much.

Letting go, as if knowing Rashi was hurt.

Secretly, Rashi touched her stomach, on the bandage she still let wrapped around there to keep the stitches from yesterday's abortion operation. Back Rashi felt that part was painful, later he was used to holding it and it was dry.

His stomach is not enlarged, and whatever nonsense about man growing in it is mortal.

The anatomical material of the brain is one of the compulsory lessons Mahesa gave him. Mahesa said, to understand until reading someone's mind, one of the basics is to understand the basic things of a human being. In addition to learning about the matter of male and female brain differences, Rashi also never learned the differences in the brains of girls and pregnant women. Roughly speaking, the circuit of the female brain will change and will continue to change following the development of the fetus.

Not just a psychological change, but a biological one. Even though Rashi had understood, he did not expect the change to be like this.

The child has no soul, still a small lump of flesh that proceeds to form the eyes, the nose. And it was only a few days that Rashi realized he existed. But Rashi couldn't even understand why it felt like the boy's departure was harder for him to handle than the loss of Dad.

But losing him was enough to make him want to be destroyed.

Her baby.

He cannot be named Dias.

He is more aptly named ....

No. gabe. Don't do it or he's getting sane. He's just his favorite. He doesn't need a name for Rashi to love and miss him.

She's an evil mother, after all, she can't protect her baby.

"Mama!" The daydream that almost made Rashi sob immediately broke to see Yatha running from the back of the sofa where she was sitting. The boy pushed his little legs to reach Rashi's place while carrying a rose in his hand. "Mama, this is for Mama."

Rashi focused on something else. "Yatha, it's got its duri."

But Yatha shook her head. "Dibelsihin with Brother Canda." Yatha hugged Rashi's knee, handed the pink rose again. "Mama. Said Brother Canda, bidadali can not cry."

Rashi.

Rasya gawked and Abah choked on his coffee.

The next instant Rashi laughed, receiving the flower despite once again mis-focusing on the others. "Abang Candra said that?"

"Yes." Yeah." Yatha innocently nodded. "Mama don't wilt like a leaf. Beautiful mom is like this flower. Yatha doesn't like sad Mama. But Yatha couldn't cry like Captain Amelika."

Rasya's laughter filled the silence. Rashi blinked between having to laugh, but Candra also taught her sister something like seducing women. Seen Abah who sighed with a face 'it wasn't my son' before Rashi finally laughed.

"Don't slap you as a Candra river crocodile." Rasya patted Yatha's head on Rashi's lap. "For a long time taught to shoot girls."

"Shoot what girl Mama? Why shot?"

Rashi lowered his head, peeking at Yatha's cheek without answering her question. "Thank you, Honey. It's so pretty."

"Year Mama."

"Say Candra, Yatha?" Abah asked instead.

"Yes." Yeah." Yatha nodded very surely. "Say, Mama is a bidadali. Beautiful, fragrant, must be embraced."

While Abah and Rasya were laughing at Yatha's words, Rashi looked back. Finding Candra glaring ferociously at them, but immediately turned away when Rashi saw her.

Faintly seen he cursed, a normal reaction when he was caught doing silly and did not know what to do.

Why would Candra say that to Yatha? Just teaching him the phrase to keep Rashi entertained? But why was he glaring as if annoyed Yatha humiliated him?

Masa, anyway? Rashi thought, when it came to the reasons he had faced so often.

Candra didn't show up again even when Uma came. He is busy in the garden beside the house alone while Rashi is chatting with Uma and Sara.

As usual, there is no calmness if there is Sara, let alone meet Yatha.

"YOU GAVE FLOWERS TO RASHI?!!!! IHHHH, FUNNY BANGEEEET!!" Sara hugged Yatha's brutal body, smelling and wiggling it at will. Yatha did not look comfortable, but she liked Sara who liked to spoil her, so resigned. "I want flowers too, Yathaaaaa! Love Brother is also the floweraaaa!"

He's safe, at least. Rashi chooses to dwell in the kitchen with Uma to prepare lunch together.

"You're not saying you want to come, son. You see, Uma didn't leave that day."

Rashi smiled a little carrot chopping for their soup. "Sorry, Uma. I think Uma's at home with Abah."

Uma Dahlia is known as one of her most gentle aunts. It's been very tested, because it has a son as big as Candra and as chatty as Sara.

The existence of Uma and Mother is very different. Mother tends to be fierce, firm and the type that does not like soft weak—although of course Mother also has a soft side, such as coming to Rashi's room to accompany her to sleep when sick, going home from school to prepare Rashi's favorite food at the table, or if Rashi is afraid to sleep alone, Mother will invite him to sleep together in their room—while Uma, from her carriage was soft. No need to talk much, stared at and rubbed it feels very dear.

Uma knew Rashi had been crying, so she carefully hugged him on the sidelines of their cooking activities.

"Patience, dear. There's still Uma and Abah for you."

Facing people as soft as this actually makes Rashi sungkan look sad. Because he was the same, and Rashi always felt the pain of seeing others sad. It felt very uncomfortable if Rashi looked, let alone faced with the slump of people. According to Rashi, Uma was also the same until her tears were blocked in front of this woman.

Rashi just smiled. "Thank you, Uma."

Uma nodded. Back looking at his stove to flip the fried fish on the frying pan. "So you want to move to Candra's school?"

"Yes, Uma."

"That's good. You can then go to school. You have a guard too. Anyway you just calm down, Uma same Abah who will take care of the rest for you."

It seems, there will be no barriers Rashi moved to Maespati. Mahesa gets rid of everything so Rashi can move, even one class with Candra.

I don't know what he's thinking, but Rashi can't undo his intentions for Yatha's sake either.

Uma had been willing to negotiate so that Rashi still leave his sister alone to this house rather than bother themselves, but instead now Abah and Rasya defend him. Saying no problem as long as Rashi is not distracted.

They don't want to see Rashi cry anymore.

The parents including Rasya went to discuss, and Rashi and Sara understood that they had to give them space. Because Yatha ran towards the park where Candra was crouching—she seemed so embarrassed that when Uma called her to eat, Candra said later.

"What's the reason for suddenly not laper? I thought you were going to die because you didn't eat breakfast." Sara sneers when Candra Cuek plays cell phone.

Rashi gave a small smile, shaking her head at the cynicism. She told you Sara used to confide in her sister, right? Every time I meet Rashi at a family event, whether it's a wedding, a lebaran or a sub-district, Sara will always confide in the real 'branch, brother, ' if traced, he wants to be noticed, Candra's too cute.

"Cand." Rashi pats Candra on the shoulder for her to look over. "What's laper? Shall I take a meal?"

"Huh? Don't need. Just relax."

Not forcing anything, Rashi nodded and passed to come sit in the hall where Sara was sitting hugging Yatha. He rarely goes into Uma's house, actually, because Rashi does not have time to visit. Were it not for Yatha, Rashi might never have set foot on Uma's porch unless Candra or Sara got married.

He did not know that Uma made a small green garden with natural shades on the side of the house.

The size is not big. Probably about two by three meters. The bottom line is small and narrow, but enough to be able to enjoy the green grass, sun on the gray walls that are crawled by creeping plants, and some collections of flowers both types of flowers and rare agglonema. Small rocks scattered into a footing also look clean.

The atmosphere is comfortable to calm the mind here.

"That means later if we go to school, you take Yatha too, keep getting pinned down in the school playgroup?"

Rashi nodded as a small smile saw Yatha blabbering on the flowers. "The plan."

"But I don't know, Rashi, students can follow his son's nitipin there or not. I mean, like it's a playgroup for teachers."

There's Mahesa.

Impossible can't.

And Rashi hates his heart which is not at all restless. It was as if ever since he knew Mahesa intervened, wanting the matter to be resolved anyway.

He himself said not to disturb his life anymore.

"Why not be signed with Uma aja, anyway? It will be calmer if signed with Uma. Uh, but if Yatha goes to school, it means you can squirm every break dong." Sara again kissed her sister's brutal cheeks. "You can see Yatha every day. Muachs. Muachs. Muachs. You'll play with brother, okay?"

Rashi chuckles. "Mama wants Yatha, too, huh? At Yatha's school, too."

"Yes. Mama same with Yatha."

"So dong too."

"Mama's the same sister Yatha."

"Ckck." Candra suddenly made a sound. "The dangers of adek lo. A kid is a playboy."

"Dih, haphazardly."

"Belgium!" Sara stuck out her tongue. "Yatha playboy is basically handsome. Brother tuh, pure crocodile. He's a crocodile, his face looks like a crocodile."

"Play boy?" Yatha tilted her face.

Of course before he was poisoned with unclear thoughts, Rashi straightened out. "Play boy means that children like to play. Yatha likes to play, right?"

"Like, Mama! Yatha likes to play with Mama!"

"Here dong hugs Mama."

Yatha breaks away from Sara's embrace, crashing Rashi's body until the wound is painful.

"I want to be hugged too. Yatha here dong hug Brother."

"You're the same mom."

"Now, anyway?!"

He's tired of being kissed.

But Sara wouldn't give up. The girl immediately got up, saying she had a snack and ice cream that instantly blinded Yatha's eyes. He pretended not to give it, just so that Yatha whined to follow him walking somewhere.

Rashi was just in a hurry to see the behavior of his cousin's sister. Let them go, than Sara was jealous again.

On that occasion, Rashi turned to face Candra who was still sitting on the chair.

"Devents."

The guy shifted his phone a little. "Transmision is also lo. Don't call me a joke either."

"Can Cand be?"

"No meatball sales. What's calling?"

Rashi patted Candra's thigh, pretending to be pouting. But then his laughter softened. "Thank you, yeah."

"Make?"

"Don't."

The muscles of the human face can never lie.

Even if Candra's expression is blocked by testosterone, Rashi, who used to read someone's face from Mahesa, knows there is a smile on Candra's face that is wrong.

"Believe yourselves with Tuyul Sesat. That's what I taught doang. Not from me."

"From you too don't pa-pa kok, Bang Cand." Rashi grinned idly as he knew her grin was beautiful.

The shame on Candra's face became even more apparent as she hurriedly left.

...*...