The Choice of Abah
This Painful

"Bil, did I talk to you about something?" Ustadz Burhan ventured to ask for Nabila time when Nabila wanted to enter his room.

" What's up Stadz?"

"To be honest, I've been in love with you for a long time, but you've already chosen Ozi."

Nabila was shocked to hear Ustadz Burhan expressing his feelings.

"Oh Allah Ustadz, what will you talk about, and what is the wind, have you spoken this way in the morning?!"

" i...I'm trying to get the courage to tell you this is all the same to you, before there's another guy you're gonna pick and marry you."

"It's not that easy Stadz, the adult woman in making her choice, especially When ever felt how to love someone, who she did not love When, at least the incident left a mark for Nabila, especially when he had felt how to love someone, who he did not love when, at least the incident left a mark for Nabila, Nabila, doesn't Ustadz Burhan know that?"

"Well I know, it's just, I don't want what's happened in my life, repeated. I hated my situation at the time, which had no guts to express feelings, even though I loved you, Bill."

"When the price of feeling Ustadz, but it takes time for Nabila to open this heart, and If also keep the feeling of Kak Ozi, he will feel even more pain, if you know Nabila choose Ustadz Burhan, you know, which he already considered his foster brother."

"But.but..."

"But what is Stadz?! What if Abah knew that Ustadz and Nabila harbored feelings, people out there who only heard word of mouth would assume and look at us as not being good."

"I don't care what people say Bil, who can only judge without giving room for discussion, and more easily justify."

"Well, Nabila knows, at least it doesn't happen, people will look for opportunities to judge us, and it takes more energy for us not to care about it."

"Nothing, if you're hard to accept me. Maybe I will look rare to be able to accompany you at this Foundation, suppose what I say you have never heard and this incident never existed. Assalamu'alaikum..."

"Staaadz...." Not yet had Nabila explained at length, Ustadz Burhan chose to leave, and ended with a remark, that he would rarely be seen at the Foundation.

"There's another problem, just solved that one problem." Nabila Gumam.

"I may not accept Ustadz Burhan, although he is kind, but what other words, and will consider me a woman who has no self-respect, married a man who is like his own brother." Batin Nabila is getting inflamed.

Nabila wanted to try indifferently with this incident, but really damaged the mood of his who was in the spirit of developing the Foundation.

What else is the energy of Nabila drained completely to think about the construction of the Islamic Hospital, which has just entered its initial phase. Now he is facing a problem that cannot be considered trivial.

Nabila had to think hard to keep all this, and did not want Ustadz Burhan disappointed excessive, until eventually it will be a snow ball that continues to grow.

Too early for Nabila to hear this news, his concentration is clearly divided by events that are fairly short, will have a big effect later.

"I accept Ustadz Burhan, how Abah feels, even though he hates Kak Ozi, the heart of a father is not willing if his son is injured." Say Nabila in the heart.

"Somehow it felt like I had to force myself to fall in love, with a man that I myself never terbesit to have. O Allah, Thou art the heart of man." His mind continued to be filled with anxiety, almost sitting for almost an hour at the desk doing nothing.

His ears were stung like bees, when the person he had considered as an older brother expressed his love, especially Ustadz Burhan had harbored his love for a long time, even when Nabila often mentioned his name in the ear of Ustadz Burhan, when Nabila often poured out his feelings and was amazed by the figure of Fahrurrozi, even at that time he had already hurt the feelings of Ustadz Burhan.

"That is to say, when I often confided and did a lot of talk about Mr. Ozi, it was Ustadz Burhan trying to calm his heart! Astaghfirullah, I've been hurting people's feelings for so long." Nabila recalled those times, when his heart was amazed by the young Ustadz Fahrurrozi and often asked for the opinion of Ustadz Burhan, without Nabila realizing he had hurt his feelings.

In a different place, Ustadz Burhan chose to vent his disappointment into the mosque, he tried to calm his mind by upholding the Dhuha prayer and soaking his speech with the letter of Ar-Rahman, so sweet and full of devotion, he said, as if by the letter his stone was calm, not the best lover only God, no loving faithful only the love of God, He is the most trusted place and guardian of secrets, after reciting Ar-Rahman's letter, Ustadz Burahan conveyed his feelings to God through prayer.

"O Allah, may I overextend this feeling, without first involving You in the affairs of the heart, whose ego I tear down the embrace, without me realizing You are the All-reversing of the human heart.

Do not let me be a majnun like Qais who misses Laila, at least I have expressed this love, a servant who so admired the creatures of Your creation, that I forgot the creator. I admire paintings so much, I don't want to know who painted them.

Now, I leave it to You, Lord, though I misstep, neglecting to involve You in world affairs, which is finally when I am disappointed, sick and wounded, just come whining for mercy to You, forgive me God.

It is clear that the world has twisted me in such a beauty, this sense of pity that I misplaced, and just like a reflected ball, to hit my face. Now I leave it all to You, O God. Please open the door of apology to the greatest extent for the fault of the servant who slaved in the love of creatures. Please accept my forgiveness, O God..."

Ustadz Burhan returned to activity, this time he had to strengthen his heart to be able to see the face of Nabila, and assume that what had happened never existed, and that what had happened never existed, he tried hard with what became Nabila's decision, he realized too early he expressed his feelings, without thinking long, if Nabila was the ex-wife of a man who had considered him brother to himself, he said, and what would happen if Abah knew that he kept his feelings for Nabila.

Ustadz Burhan ventured to come to see Nabila and apologize, because Ustadz Burhan was aware of the sinful affair with the creature, God would forgive if a human child, first apologizing to his neighbor.

"Assalamu'alikum's chat...Bill..."

The greeting of Ustadz Burhan disturbed his daydream.

"Was...Wa'alikum salam Ustadz."

"Sorry to interrupt your time again, but my arrival this time just wanted to apologize for my attitude this morning."

"Yes Ustadz, really for Nabila was shocked, early in the morning someone brought romantic words, it could be because Nabila had not had breakfast, so shocked horrified."

"You can, may you forgive."

"In fact Nabila also apologized, maybe Nabila's speech made Ustadz hurt, early in the morning Nabila love breakfast soap words...I'm sorry Staadz...."

"Well Bill, may you forgive. Yaudah, I just want to say that, I say I want to learn first, there happens to be Ustadz who is not present...Assalamu'alikum."

"Wa'alaikum salutations."

Nabil was slightly relieved by the courage Ustadz Burhan apologized.

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Yours truly...

@emhaalbana