The True Love
Misfortune Meera
You, yes you.. So polite is the way you entered my world, knocking at the door with your greetings. My eyes see something different from you. That light you always emit. I also saw your eyes twinkling. Looking at you is a calm. Your smile is simple, yet feels special.”
Writing down my heart is one of my habits when lonely, because it always makes me smile and thank God for the favors that God gives. God is the greatest director. Making his servant\hijrah as fast as lightning. And Allah knows when the guidance of his servant\is worth.
Aisha Nur Fiiqolbi. That's my name. The most beautiful name I ever got from my parents. Name which means I ‘Ayesha Light in hati’. Just call me Aisyah. I'm 16 years old. I am an akhwat who has long undergone the process of hijrah but still violates the commandment\His.
I'm the kind of person who is jolly, humorous but the mood likes to drop drastically. I have two best friends, Vina and Karis. Wherever we are always together until permission to the toilet is all along.
At that time the dzuhur adhan was being proclaimed, me and my two friends immediately rushed to the Mosque. I deliberately took them through the mading and it turned out that there was incredible information. I got information about Brother Yusuf, the brother-in-law who became the brother of my dreams.
“Karis, look at this.inii.” I pointed towards the mading of the biodata section of an ikhwan.
“Ya keep why?” coldly he answered.
“Liat nih.. there is the type of akhwatnya also.. The first one, sholihah.. Second, be devoted to parents, third feminine, fourth yellow and fifth not too high. Duhhh ris, pokonya I should be able to meet these 5 criteria” I said with confidence.
From that moment on I started to find out about myself. Starting from my height, the color of my skin, my daily habits. Am I feminine? Have I been devoted to my parents? have I become a sholihah?. So many questions about myself.
Day after day I passed and tried to improve myself. Until one day I told him the problem I was facing was my unfamiliarity with my father. I told that to Brother Yusuf, we really like to exchange stories and he also always gave input to change the ugliness that is in me. After I told him that, he gave me a suggestion that I should apologize to my father immediately. I waited for the right moment to apologize, I took the time when I was 17 years old. In front of my parents, I kissed her hands and filled the atmosphere with tears until I finally succeeded. Successfully getting forgiveness from both my parents is not just from my father. I don't know, is that one of my parents' forms of filial devotion? But since that moment, I became familiar with my father and diligently helped my parents.
Well, there is one more criterion that I have not met that is ‘Sholihah’. I was confused where to start. But my best friend's advice is to start with introspection, whatever I need to fix. Starting from prayer on time, closing the aurat, thinking positively and attending the assembly of\-majelis of science. I walked through the stages without me thinking “What am I doing because of Allah?”. After a few weeks I began to change, little by little I learned to become a sholihah akhwat. Although there are many temptations but I try to Istiqomah.
From then on I began to recognize the friends of the\friends of Brother Yusuf and they recognized me. Every time they meet me, there must be a discussion about Brother Yusuf. Until one day one of his best friends told me “Have it been. No need to wait, he liked another newspaper. Not kamu”. I was surprised to hear that sentence but I tried to put up a face no problem at that time.
“Aisyaahh.. please answer me. You why?” Karis asked as he wiped my tears.
“Kak.. Brother Yusuf ris” I replied with a little stammering.
“Iya why?”
“Kak Yusuf likes another actress”
After that, I started crying and kept crying. Karis smiled and hugged me. “Aisha, this is the love of Allah.. God is showing His love for you.” I fell silent and let go of Karis' embrace.
“You mean?” I asked with a surprised face.
“I know, you want to be a sholihah not because of God. But I'm afraid you're heartbroken if I advise you like that. You must remember, Allah is jealous. Allah is jealous that you like Joseph in such a way. God wants you to return to Him.”
“Astaghfirullah.” I lowered my head and tried to calm myself down.
These Two Weeks.. I didn't meet Brother Yusuf. I'd love to say “I miss you” But now, it feels so hard to say that. I can only cry before God, on this sacred prayer mat, and I reveal everything from the heart.
“Yaa Allah, tell him.. I've missed him.. Please.. I'm sorry I still can't shake the taste. I do not know until when this feeling will stop but at this time I will try to love You and straighten out my hijrah intention to improve myself because of God and become sholihah because I want to get Your Ridho Ya Allah”.
After that, I tried to describe the taste that ever existed. Because now I know and understand that “It is better to love that is by keeping” and “The most beautiful of a farewell is mengikhlaskan”. Finally, I learned from my mistakes. Learn to be sholihah because of Allah and be yourself because of Allah. Everything I do is by God's permission but not everything I do is accompanied by God's pleasure and you should never look at pain as a torture because God gives pain not only a rebuke but you must know that it is one of His forms of love for you.