The Underrated Online Writer
disappointed

The cock crows a sign of the day coming. Amira was still lying in bed. His condition is not okay after all night he thought about the story idea coupled with Devan who did not quickly go home from his friend's house.

“Why are you, Mir?” Devan asked when he saw his wife who had not yet gotten out of bed.

“I'm not feeling well, mas.” Reply Amira rasak.

“Yes, you're doing it first. We want to leave.” Devan says get ready to go to work.

Amira just nodded. Devan easily told him to rest when they were living where. Amira held back the dizziness in her head to the kitchen. He will prepare food for the residents of the house.

If they were just two, Amira would ask Devan to buy them outside first. However, Amira was unwilling to do that as long as she stayed at her in-laws' house. She did not want to be the gossip of her mother-in-law anymore with the neighbors.

“Fish is in the refrigerator.” Said the Goddess.

Amira understood what her mother-in-law had meant. He immediately took the fish to cook. Because her body is not fit, Amira only cooks fish pindang.

After the rice, fish and vegetables were done, Amira hurriedly returned to the room. He's already so tired.

Hearing this, her mother-in-law called her granddaughter to eat. Amira was just trying to close her eyes withstanding the pain in her head.

All day, Amira only endured her own pain without anyone noticing. At night, she asks Devan to help her massage her back.

“Mas, please massage my back.” Amira said to her husband who was playing with a cell phone.

“Bentar.” Devan answered without looking at him.

There was a wounded man inside when he heard Devan's husband's reply. Quietly Amira prayed to God for tenderness for her husband. Although Devan did not commit violence to her, Devan's treatment was more painful than domestic violence in physical form.

Devan and his family's treatment hurts Amira from within. Perhaps, this is what makes some people dark eyes to commit suicide.

After a few minutes, Devan approached Amira. “which one to massage?” ask Devan.

Amira did not see Devan's expression as she asked because the man was sitting behind her.

“My back, mas.” Answer Amira.

Devan started to massage him. Amira felt only one hand of Devan touch behind her. Apparently, the other hand was holding a cell phone.

“Which is again?” ask Devan.

“Udah, mas.”

Actually, Amira still wants a massage. However, he saw Devan was not sincere in doing so so he chose to end it.

Amira's sleep was not as quiet as usual. He occasionally wakes up to relieve a pain in his head. If lying down, then he will feel pain in the head so that Amira chose to sit so as not to be tormented.

As much as she tried to make her crying voice not disturb Devan. Yep. Amira cried because the pain that afflicted her was so strong.

Throughout the night, Amira spent sitting while Devan slept soundly. No. gabe. Amira is sure Devan knows that she is being tormented but Devan is careless.

***

[Sir Rose, why not upload a story again?] ask one of the readers of Amira's story. Yes, Amira wrote under her pen name as the Red Rose. He was not confident to appear as himself.

Amira answered all the comments written by her loyal readers. Some are just comments with further writing or encouraging it.

It was they who made Amira display a sincere smile without coercion. It was in the world that Amira found her true happiness. In the real world, he always pretended to be strong.

Amira had just finished her bath when Devan was just coming home.

“Capek also.” Devan said after changing his clothes.

“Yes already, mas istrahat we just ate.” Amira.

Even though he was hungry, he could still hold back until Devan was not tired. During her marriage to Devan, Amora had never eaten alone in the kitchen. She was willing to endure hunger in order to wait for Devan instead of eating with hot ears by the words of her mother-in-law.

However, until Azan Zuhur reverberated, Devan always spoke for a moment. Amira could not take it anymore. He takes the phone from Devan's hand and deletes the game app that takes up Devan's entire time.

“Do I not matter, mas? You always play with your phone. No matter what happens to me. In fact, you never asked me how I was doing. From morning, the cell phone continues until you go to work, the cell phone goes home and continues to be seen. When you sleep, you play with your phone until you fall asleep. Didn't you think I existed? What am I really in the eyes of a mas? Doll?” Amira desperately held back her tears in order not to fall in front of Devan.

Devan was silent. Either he heard Amira's complaint or not but he did not respond in the slightest.

“Mas ever know what I experienced at home as long as the mas is not at home? Do you know the words you say always offend me, mas.” This time Amira was no longer able to stem her tears. She cried in front of her husband like everyone else.

Amira is always envious of her friends who treat their wives well.

“Mother always offends me who is not yet pregnant, mas. Mom always compares me to Wiwin. Mom always says I can't get pregnant.”

Amira pressed her voice so as not to scream. She did not want her voice to be heard by her husband's family or neighbors.

“Already?”

The deg!

Devan's response was beyond Amira's expectations. He thought Devan would respond well to his complaints. At least hugging calms him down.

Amira was silent with her own expectations. He braced his own heart without any attention from Devan.

Devan comes out of the room leaving Amira with her tears. I don't know what demon was in his heart that left his wife depressed like that.

“I've never been treated like this, mas. I've always been noticed by my father, always loved by my father. I really hope you can be like dad, at least there when I get hurt like this.” Amira said to herself.

The shadows of her life before marriage were milling in her mind. Her tears flowed when she remembered her father. Amira is closer to her father than her mother because she was never in love with her mother.

However, if the same father, Amira like a child who is always noticed and loved. In fact, his father seemed to see Amira could not say anything so he was always alert to help Amira. This made Amira more dear to her father.

Although Amira was seen as strong, mature and strong in the eyes of the people outside there, but still considered a child by his father. He did not expect the man who had taken responsibility from his father's hands to bring him in the hellish life of the world.

So far, Amira's father has not known if his son is tormented with Devan and his family. If he finds out, maybe Amira will be taken back by him. Which father would let his son be tormented by others. Whichever father has the child is treated unkindly by the one who well promises before the Lord, before him, and his extended family will take responsibility from him instead torturing him slowly.

No one has the heart to see a girl raised lovingly tormented. Moreover, since graduating from college, Amira always thought about her family so often she lightened her father's burden. He often helped his sister's college expenses, meeting the needs of his father and mother as well.

“Dad, sorry Amira. Amira is unhappy with Devan but Amira cannot leave Devan. Amira is afraid to embarrass father and mother if Amira chooses to end the new marriage for the rest of this corn. Amira ...”

Amira could not continue her words. His chest was too tight to keep talking. Repeatedly in the breath to calm down. Until he fell asleep crying.