(Not) Layla Majnun
Mosaic 1

My name is Layla, Najwa Layla Fathurrohman . My grandfather gave me that name. When I was 12 years old I asked Eyang why I was called Layla instead of Najwa, because I didn't like it. Layla's name is too familiar. Even in one class there were three people named Layla, so I asked my friends to call me Najwa. The call was for my friends, my family still called me Layla.

“Layla, the kui brand symbol of fineness, melancholy, understated and beauty.” said Eyang at that time.

“Layla it eyang night. What good is it?,” refute me with a frown. I think it's completely unethical. But he smiled and shook his head. He seems to think I am funny.

“Bengi kui silent. Bengi kui calm down, no neko-neko . Tetep, jejeg,“ advanced eyang. Makes me even more clueless with his words.

“I added don't understand Eyang.“ My annoyance.

“Wes to, jeneng kui Donggo. Mbok y in trimo . Wes kadung.“ Said eyang with a laugh.

At that time I was upset, because I had absolutely no idea what my Eyeang meant. But now it's different, I know what it all means.

“Layla! you are ready!"

I turned towards the voice that was shouting out loud earlier, his tone was like wanting to get angry. But no, he was never angry. Even if I always piss him off.

“You're still busy with novels .“ Throw her away by snatching the novel in my hands and just putting it on the nightstand without waiting for my approval.

“I like Mas, what's wrong," I argue.

He did not pay attention, even busy packing clothes that I should have cleaned from earlier.

He's my brother, Qois Albifardzan I used to call Mas Albi. Actually he's father and mother's adopted son. I'm an only child and my parents would love to have a son. Because mothers can no longer conceive they adopt Mas Albi.

Even so, my parents never distinguished between me and Mas Albi. In fact I feel they love Mas Albi more than I do. Well, he's more reliable than I am.

“You will be late. Hurry on!" Said Mas Albi. I lazily packed my things.

“You're an adult. Mosok grill Mase ae sing noto .(You are an adult, cook Mas readyin)" said Albi.

My mas was more deft than me, he didn't even ask me which one I should take and which one I shouldn't. He took everything I normally needed.

As of now, she took some clothes, hijab and even daleman in my closet and neatly organized into a suitcase.

“Sampean, come with me, me?"

“Iya. Now take a shower!“ The answer.

“Nginep, Ndak?"

“Mboten nduk, tomorrow I have morning lecture.“

Disappointed, that's what I feel. Sis Albi will just take and go straight home. Ever since she started college she no longer wanted to stay at my cottage. He used to stay even one day.

Yes, I go to Al Hasan Sarang, Central Java. The lodge is famous for its salaf but also its general education. Since graduating Junior High I went there, leaving home, family and especially Mas Albi.

“This is the novel not to be brought. You won't even learn, but just read the novel." Mas Albi Word . He took the novel and put it in my closet.

“Ah! I'll just take it, lah.“ My eagle. I stood up to snatch the novel before he mixed it with the books in the closet.

“Gak, can Layla... Same manut, Mas.“ His word. Makes me unable to argue. Either every time Mas Albi said I had to keep his word, I couldn't resist him at all.

Mas Albi snatched the novel in my hands again.

I gave up the novel I liked the most. He put it in the window, and lay with the other books.

“What do you like about the novel.Sampek does not want to split?“ Ask Mas Albi. Maybe he was curious about the story of the novel . He knew if I liked something it would be hard for me to let go. But the question is that I'm good, I don't want him to know why I like the novel so much.

I don't want us to talk about the novel anymore. I took a towel, and brought the change of clothes that had been prepared in the bed.

“Ya... You take a shower first. Don't dawdle. “ Kata Mas Albi's. He saw me preparing to take a shower, and intended to get out of my room. I nodded, and waited for him to come out of the room.

If only time did not pass quickly maybe a shower is not something that can separate us. When we were kids, we used to shower together, play soap in the bathtub, play water, or even clog the water channel so that the water coming out of the faucet does not go out and pool.It can make us happy, splashing water by stomping our feet is an extraordinary thing. It's that simple and that close.

After the bath we will be treated by the mother, and then the night we will also sleep in bed. That was before, until Mom and Dad separated us, Mas Albi had to go.

Unlike me, she's still a mole at the age of twelve. After she graduated from SD and I was still in second grade at that time.

We're sad. For the first time we were separated . Albi's cottage is not far from home. It only takes half an hour to get there. But still, we could not meet every day, could no longer play together, study, walk around and even sleep together.

When Mas Albi came home for the first time, I was so happy. Because maybe after that we can be together like we used to be, but we can't. Albi changed, he kept his distance. Do not sleep together, when being with family, he keeps his distance.

“I am indeed Mas Mu Layla! but not Mas bladder, so should not we get too close.“ He said that time when I protested with his change of attitude .

He said many things, about us who can no longer touch each other while having ablution. No longer able to get close, like we were small before. Because we are not mahroms. Even Mas Albi said, if I should not pay attention to my awrah to him again.

I was sad, I complained to my parents because I think Mas Albi was just making up about it. I said that Mas Albi is evil, so I don't want him to go back. Because after the hyacinth, he turned away from me. I don't accept that.

“What Albi said is true. But you are still brothers. Mas Albi also remains your Mas." My father said it makes me sad. I cry for our destiny. Why didn't Alloh make Mas Albi my brother.

I went from my place, to the bookcase and picked up the novel that Mas Albi had saved earlier. I opened the novel sheet by sheet and stopped at a single page that I folded the edges.

نَهَارِى نَهَارُ النَّاسِ حَتَّى إِذَا بَدَا لِىَ الَّليْلُ هَزَّتّنِى اِلَيكَ الْمَضَاجِعُا

اَقْضِى نَهَارِى بِالْحَدِيثِ وَبِالْمُنَى وَيَجْمَعُنِى وَالْهَمُّ بِاللَّيْلِ جَامِعُ

لَقَدْ أَثْبَتَتْ فِى اْلقَلْبِ مِنْكِ مَحَبَّةً كَمَا تَثْبُتُ فِى الرَّاحَتَيْنِ الْاَصَابِعُ

My day is the day of another man

When night falls, my sleep is often disturbed your face, I am restless

All day long I spent with sweet talk and wonderful wishes

And all night, I was gripped with gloom and longed for revenge

My love for you has been embedded in the recesses of the kalbuku

The fingers of our two hands are clutched

Well. Perhaps as already know , it is the verse Layla Majnun. The novel that I had been protecting from earlier was the philosophy of love novel, in which there was the story of Layla and Majnun.

That's where I found out what Eyang meant by calling me Layla. Maybe he wanted me to be like Layla, who had a strong stance. But I also don't want to be like Layla in her story, who would willingly lose her love just like that.

I'm Layla, who also wants to have love like Layla who can never destroy her love. Who will remain faithful even though the inhabitants of the world never approve of his feelings of love. And I want to be like Layla, whom Qois loved until the end of his life.

But I'm not as lucky as Layla. Layla was so lucky to get a love reply from her lover Qois, while I? My qois doesn't even know that I love him.

Without feeling my tears fall, the majnun verse for Layla made me fall asleep. I have read it many times, and many times I have fallen in their love.

I closed the page of the novel, took it with me and then I put it in a drawer in the closet. After that I lock the drawer and I put the key in the bag that I will bring to the cottage later.

Like Layla who can't accept other people harassing her love, so do I. Not wanting someone to destroy my love is still a secret between me and my God.