Adagio |Risk Of Life|
The Adagio 24
Song Hyuji's POV.
Could the world not be noisy, just for a moment?! Just once?!
Ah, no!
Could my life not be quiet for a moment?! It felt like my head was about to break thinking about everything that was appearing one by one in front of my eyes.
“Actually what happened to this family?”
I muttered, frustrated. Breathing in the air here, is like inhaling between a thick pile of dust that is suddenly hit by the wind. It hurts, it's tight, but it forces you to keep breathing because you need to breathe.
Mama always said that I was the son of the unlucky bearer. Long time ago. Since I began to understand what it means to love, and also happiness.
I always imagined that both of them were so scary. Mama always gave me a different kind of love and happiness. I don't feel both at home. And I'm more comfortable living my own world, like a less sane person.
Mama said I was a fucking carrier. Then how do I bring her luck?
I was lying on top of the bed, staring at the ceiling of the room that was dashed by the dim light from the sleeping lights that a few minutes ago I turned on lazily. And damn, my tears won't come out. Looks like my tears are conspiring to make me look even more miserable. Yeah, depressing. I'm pathetic.
I again inhaled the tightness, then changed the sideways position and found a shadow of myself created on the curtain. Darkened. Depressing.
I reached out my hand floating in the air, empty, that's all.
But, thinking dozens of times, I was still luckier than the young man who had no cue popped into my mind. Like a ghost, with a special grin that I like lately.
Of course, the young man was even more pitiful. Her father went nowhere since she was a baby. If you ask me where I know it from, the answer is that he told me that. He lived together with his mother without the slightest livelihood from his father. You are not responsible. And I, at least papa loves me even though mom treats me not as well as she should. Yeah, I still have a little luck.
I wanted to call John. But it's too late to make calls and talk on the phone. Waitaminute! Or am I just running away?
***
If you recall how the struggle of the mother raising herself alone, John knows it is very difficult and John always tries to be the only person who can be relied upon. However, maybe good luck has not sided until now. Nevertheless, John still hopes to be a reliable person.
“Mother, have you eaten?” john asked gently while sitting beside the mother who was busy picking perilla leaves.
“What are you asking mom for?! Then what about you?!”
John knew, although sometimes his mother was very cruel to him, but the sense of love of middle-aged women was much greater.
John crawled closer, smiling as he embraced his mother from the side.
“What are you doing?!” asked the mother, looking uncomfortable and trying to escape from John's embrace.
“I miss you, mom!!” he said, memejam felt the aroma that he so liked from the mother—harum nan soft.
“What's up?” asked the mother quickly, knowing very well why her son was suddenly spoiled like this. However, the mother sincerely said that, because she did not want John to make anything else as an escape. “If you're asking for money, sorry!” continued the mother smiled slightly and looked at the beautiful face of her son. “Mother hasn't paid this month!”
John's smile faded away. Not that he wanted to hear, but he also had income from his job at the flower shop owned by Hyuji.
“Bu, how does mother feel after raising me alone for twenty-six years?”
His mother nailed, his heart like it had just been pierced by hot lead when she heard such a sudden question from John. With a straight and wistful look at each perilla leaf in the stainless basin in front of her cross-legged feet, the mother replied with lips and a slightly trembling voice.
“Why are you asking like that now?”
John realized that the question might reopen the old wounds that had been trying to be healed by his mother alone. But John did not want to be a coward, he even felt too late for questioning this now.
“Sorry, I can't raise you properly!” continued the mother with a bitter smile at the corner of the lips that have been slightly wrinkled.
John distanced himself for a moment, then again grabbed the mother's thin body and hugged her tightly.
“Not like that!” sergeant John with the softest and most affectionate sentence. He leaned his chin between his mother's shoulders and head, then patted her on the frail back. “If I were a father, I wouldn't leave a beautiful and strong woman like you! Surely he is now regretting his decision to let go of mom, right?”
Unknowingly, the tears that he had been enduring for over twenty years had escaped just like that. Yes, maybe all this time he did not want to show his weak side in front of John, but tonight, John seems to have to know if he is actually not okay is not it?
At once John also straightened his body and distanced himself. He saw the mother who was already teary-eyed with a chaotic feeling. Seeing that, his heart was broken. He didn't mean it, he just wanted to know his mother's feelings.
“Sorry..”
The words really did not want to be heard, John even hugged the mother tightly. Hearing the soft sobs of the lips of the mother with a feeling of destruction and also eyes that have blurred full of tears.
“Mom need not apologize, because mom is the greatest woman I know!”
The mother tightly hugged her son's burly back. The thing he always did secretly when his son fell asleep with bruises after receiving punches from his hands. Yes, he always did, physically hurting John as an outlet for resentment, and hugging him silently when night was already embracing the day as regret.
“Mother is the most precious human being to me, so—” John pauses for a moment, then pulls away and rubs the tears that wet both cheeks of the mother lovingly while presenting his warm smile. “Mother never consider yourself a bad mother like this! After all, mother, until I came to this world, mother is still the best woman, beautiful, and also strong for me! I will always protect and love you, mother!”
The mother smiled proudly, because she felt successful in educating her son to be a good man. His arm was stretched out, grabbing one side of John's face and rubbing it gently. “Thank you son! I am proud to have a good son like you!”
Of course John was happy to hear that. But there was one thing he wanted to say, and was eager to refute the fear in his heart, as was his mother.
“I don't know what I saw was right or wrong, ma'am!”
The mother also gave full attention to the son only wayangnya, waiting for the continuation of the sentence that will be said the son.
“I like to see it!”
Seen her? Her dad?
At least, that question came up inside the mother's head. “Who?” his question was doubtful, filled with curiosity with both beads shaking with worry. Didn't expect that answer to come from his son's lips.
“Dad!”
The mother's heart melted. His eyes faded for a moment.
Does John really recognize his father's face? they last met in Haeundae nineteen years ago.
“I don't remember very well his face, maybe wrong, but I'm like no stranger to seeing that face!”
“Where did you see it?” sergeant the mother was quick, did not give John pause just to give the right answer.
John bowed lethargic, playing the edge of his shirt agitated with lips that gave a slight bitter smile. Then again raised his face and found a fearful expression in both pupils of the mother.
Presumably, John did not feel like adding to his mother's fear. However, he must accept the reality that is not necessarily wrong or right. Then with a sweet voice like honey, John muffled the wrath in his own heart while opening his lip blade again with a smile just to say,
“Home Song Hyuji!” []
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Well Loh?!!
Curious No?
Nyesel if not read this story, because I think this story is most draining the contents of the brain. Several times twisting the grooves and making dizziness... 😂
But it's okay...
Thank you for taking the time to read. Don't forget to leave a trail of Like and Comment... Because your support is my passion.
See You Next Chapter,
Vi.