Carmen's Love Trap
In Jogja With Bahri

Carmen

I booked an impromptu plane ticket to Jogja. Kukabari Bahri when I just got to Jogja. Bahri told me to wait for him to come pick me up.

I waited while lamenting my fate that would soon become a widow at a young age. How shiny. Depressing.

That's right what Abi said. Based on the experience of Abi and Abang Wira who married young and ended up with many problems in life. I should have listened to the advice Abi gave me, but I just felt smarter.

Now, I feel that my marriage may soon be just a memory that leaves a lot of wounds. I don't know when it can heal because this time it's not just a scratch wound I feel but a sharp incision.

I raised my face and saw Bahri running while looking for my whereabouts. Bahri smiled welcoming me but not with me who immediately cried and poured into his arms.

I don't care if I'm the center of a lot of people's spectacle. Fuck all that. I just wanted to cry and let go of the sad feeling that had been hurting me all along.

Bahri doesn't talk much. He rubbed my hair gently and let the shirt wet with my tears.

I was so satisfied that I cried in her arms. Now I realize I'm re-shaming myself in public. I let go of my embrace and wiped away the tears that made my eyes swell.

"Right of relief?" ask Bahri gently.

I nodded weakly. "It."

"good. Now we're talking somewhere quiet. There, there's a coffee shop. We'll talk there!"

I nodded back. I just resigned when Bahri's hand led me who was in a daze. While Bahri's other hand brought my suitcase.

He told me to sit quietly in the coffee shop and order a drink for me. "What about ice chocolate? He said chocolate is good for calming and giving a sense of happiness. I ordered ice chocolate for you?!

I just answered with a nod without a sound. Bahri then ordered drinks and soon returned with drinks and food that he ordered. "Come, you drink first! Let's just calm down, then tell me everything's the same as me."

I'm according to what Bahri asked. I drank the ice chocolate she ordered and it made me a little calmer and not cry sad like that.

"Can you tell me a story?"

I'm nodding. I told you everything that happened. All the. With nothing to hide. Bahri is my best friend right now. My other friends are busy with their lives.

"Seriously? Divorce going? Good job!" answer it honestly.

"What a good guy?" just pissed. The impression Bahri did want my household to fall apart.

"Yes good dong! Count yourself, how many times have you been disappointed? You count yourself, how many times have you cried? You count yourself, how many times have you been hurt? The answer ... a lot. One year old! It's not a short time to prove your efforts to be a good wife. I'm witness!" Bahri continued his words.

"You changed, from the spoiled Carmen to the responsible woman. You learn to make your husband breakfast, you learn to be a good wife. You've tried enough! He is the only one who never realizes all the effort you put in! Stay the husband like that. I am waiting for your widow!"

"You're glad I'm a widow? You're happy to see me sad?!" I said while returning with tears. Bahri's words turned out to be able to match the spicy level of Abang's speech.

"I'm not happy, I'm sad to see you hurt like this. What else can I do but be your loyal listener? You have a lot of effort but it is your husband who does not know himself! You deserve to be happy! Don't be confused with a guy like that anymore! I am not willing to see you suffer. Don't cry anymore, I told you not that with me you should be happy? Let's go to the night market! You get everything you want, I buy!"

I shook my head. "I don't want to! I was sad to get divorced, still invited to snack! I'm full!"

"Why are you?!"

"Not bad. Again sad!"

"If you're sad, let's sing!"

"Singing?!"

"Yes. We go to your cafe and sing live music. How's it?"

"You're crazy, huh?"

"Crazy why? It's better that way, isn't it?"

Bahri did something crazy. He took me to one of Mommy's cafes and mastered the stage area. He picked up a guitar and whispered a song to sing.

🎶Do you ever feel like breaking down?

Do you ever feel out of place?

Like somehow you just don't belong

And no one understands you

Do you ever want to run away?

Do you lock yourself in your room?

With the radio on turned up so loud

That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what its like

When nothing feels

You don't know what its like to be like me

To be hurt, to feel lost

To be left out in the dark

To be kicked when you're down

To feel like you've been pushed around

To be on the edge of breaking down

And no one there to save you

No you don't know what its like

Welcome to my life🎶

(Simple Plan-Welcoma to my life)

The boisterous applause from the spectators made me involuntarily shed tears. I sang while holding back the cries since then finally broke as well. All gave me spirit including Bahri who smiled at me.

****

Zaky

I came home empty-handed. Carmen I didn't find it either. Where'd he go?

Countless times I called his phone but my call was diverted. He won't take my call.

I walked unconsciously into Baby's room. His room was left in a neat state. The bag I gave him he didn't bring. Some of my gift dresses she stayed in. This makes me sad.

Is it that I have scratched the wound for him? Is that that bad of me?

I lay my body on the bed still smelling Baby's perfume. There hasn't been a day Baby left and I've felt like I've lost it. Baby... You where?

What would I say to my mom and her parents? All because of my stupidity! All because of my selfishness! How can I pay for all my sins to Baby? Oh Allah ....

I unknowingly fell asleep in Baby's room and when I woke up, I heard a voice coming from the kitchen. Baby's?

****