CHOICES IN LOVE
44. What's Happening to My Body?

…Sasha Yorina's…

I don't know what else to do? fate of being a subordinate is like this. Moreover, having a super sucks boss. Don't know why? Alan has changed greatly. He's no longer the Alan I used to know. He was much different, was it because of our status that had changed? He's the boss and I'm just the employee he always commands.

Sometimes I think to myself, he doesn't have any good feelings for me at all. Alan was too cruel to treat me as his employee. She never knew how hard I faced so often? when he must follow or carry out the tasks he gives.

Sometimes the orders he gave seemed intentional to torture me, test my patience and also test my endurance to endure working on him. I don't understand why Alan is being so cruel? Sometimes the words he said were so harsh and hurt my heart. Did all the torment he had given him during these two months not satisfy him? to pay for his defeat on the tender I won for Miranda and Kenan's company.

Alan never endlessly tormented me, I am just an ordinary human who also has the limits of ability. I am neither a robot nor a supernatural human with no limits, I also have a heart and feelings. Isn't it enough Alan treated me cruelly, said rudely and seemed to insult and demean me, I'm like a son of a thumbs up.

His cruel behavior to me, not cruel to his other employees. Even all the mistakes for the work done by some of his employees, bestowed on me all. I do too many tasks, which I shouldn't do. But what power, I'm under a contract that requires me to do whatever he tells me to do?

Even I must also be willing to be moved to a position and place wherever he ordered? I actually can't stand the cruel and arbitrary attitude. But I have to be strong and be patient for the next 10 months. Can I do it? the honest answer is no. I couldn't hold on for another 10 months, I lost. I want to stop right now, I want to be free.

It was all just my wishful thinking, something that would not materialize. I have to keep working and working to follow Alan's orders. Whether I get sick or not, I still have to work. My time, mind and energy are like Alan's owner. I have no right to myself. I'm sick, angry, disappointed, tired and tired of all this.

God, I want to be free, but how? I can't go on like this, Alan doesn't have a good heart anymore. Alan was too cruel, as he is today. Since the incident two days ago, after the failure of the task that Alan gave me, I cannot do well. He punished me with a job that doubled up, a financial report that I shouldn't have done, he gave it to me to fix it again.

Right now, my body feels tired and uncomfortable from last night. What's wrong with my body? don't let me get sick at this time. I have to keep working and follow what Alan says? because Alan ordered me to go back to the K.R Group. To complete a task that was delayed two days ago. I was accompanied by Kris' assistant who was always nice to me.

My head is dizzy and a little throbbing from a lack of sleep last night. I worked until midnight, a lot of office work I took home, because it had to be handed over this morning. I felt like my body was completely powerless, yet I kept trying to hold it.

'spirited Sasha, finish this task quickly and you can relax even more.' I murmured inwardly to give myself some encouragement.

My body is a little feverish, my eyes are a little hot. I have to hold on, I have to finish this and I will ask for permission to go home early. I hope Alan allows it.

I'm in Kenan's room now. I sat down and waited for him who was busy signing some papers brought by his secretary.

"are you okay Miss Sasha?" kris asked, looking at me, his worried face looked at my face which he said was pale when we just got into the car.

"yes, I'm good Kris' assistant." I replied accordingly.

'actually not Kris, my body is hot, limp and my head starts to lighten.' I murmured of course in my heart.

"your face is so pale Miss Sasha, you look like a sick person."

"no assistant Kris, I'm good. I was just sleep deprived last night for having to work on some files that had to be finished this morning."

It looks like Kris' assistant sighed looking concerned at me.

"forgive me Miss Sasha, can't help you much" he said with a sorry face.

"it's okay, it's my job" I replied by trying to smile so that Kris' assistant didn't seem to be constantly worried about me.

From a distance I saw Kenan who looked better, than two days ago. The Kenan that I am currently looking at, looks fresh and healthy. Not as limp and pale as two days ago.

'he recovered quickly, what kind of disease attacked him? as Rion said. He did not look like a sick person at all.' I muttered in my heart to see Kenan who was fine.

Kenan looked at me, causing me to turn my eyes the other way. I was honestly surprised when we met. My chest was pounding, perhaps in shock to be caught staring at him.

I tried to regulate my breathing and heartbeat which suddenly thumped fast. I'm not well right now, my God, if I have a sudden heart attack, my heart beats quickly and irregularly. I kept breathing and my heart beat back to normal as usual.

Kenan sat right in front of me with a flat face and his cold gaze looked at the two of us in turn. It looked very unfriendly, but neither I nor Kris had the choice to avoid it.

Chris and I have to solve all these problems. Don't like who we're dealing with right now? Duty is still a task. I tried to keep my eyes hotter, and the dizziness that seemed to gradually become more painful and heavy.

Kenan, who has been getting reports from the chief in charge of pending development, looked at the files I brought in for him to check. He didn't say much, knowing it was his fault. The construction was delayed because there was embezzlement of funds by the foreman at the construction site. All problematic building materials have been replaced and now the construction is almost completed.

I want to rest my body that feels hot and weak. I need to sleep well for a moment, so I can face all the tests Alan gave me. When we were about to return, Kenan suddenly said he wanted to talk 4 points with me. Kris and I looked at each other, but I could not say anything Kris got up and walked out of the room.

Now it's just the two of us. Me and Kenan.

Kenan looked at me sharply and coldly, his gaze as if staring at an enemy he did not like. I don't know if there's anything I'm doing? what makes Kenan not like this time?

"are you sick?" kenan asked suddenly, but his sharp and cold gaze still looked at me.

"no sir" I replied, shaking my head.

"did you always look messy and pale like this? did Alan not treat you well?" kenan asked with a look of disdain looking at me.

"sorry sir, what do you mean?"

Kenan smiled faintly, but his gaze still stared lightly at me.

'what else does he want?' I murmured in my heart.

"you've been working for him all this time, and you've been lying to all of us. Of course a woman like you would do anything? to make everything you want happen." he said.

I don't like what she says, does Kenan consider me a silly woman?

"what do you mean, Mr. Kenan?" I want to know more clearly.

"all your goals, I can easily guess. You approached Alan to go back to him." he replied with a look that really looked down on me.

I laughed funnyly at the accusation Kenan had given me. Why is he taking care of my personal business? whether I go back or not to Alan is none of his business.

"sorry sir, you have no right to say anything about my personal affairs. If our business is done, I say retreat." I replied with courtesy.

I don't want to create new problems anymore, I'm full enough of the problems Alan gave me. Let Kenan think anything of me? I don't care, I just want to go home and rest this time. My body really needs rest.

I got up and tried to hold my body back so as not to shirk. I was really surprised when a hand blocked my arm. Kenan holds my hand firmly, and I don't understand what Kenan wants me to do?

"sorry sir, what are you doing?" I asked while pulling back my strong hand.

"your body is hot, you're pale. Didn't Alan treat you well?" the sudden question that certainly made me surprised and did not understand Kenan's attitude.

He asked as if he was worried about me, but he underestimated me. What do you want Kenan?

"it's none of your business, sir, excuse me." I said firmly with a look of dislike. I hurried to step out of the room, but my head was dizzy and sick.

My legs suddenly squeezed and felt nothing? my body is not powered. How hard am I to hold my body? my eyes slowly darkened and my body could no longer feel.

'bruk.' I just collapsed before I could get out of the room.

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