Honor Behind the Stain
Should Express Love
“So how's your business with Khanza? Is it really finished? I mean really split?” asked Beno who came to the Emperor's rented house that morning.
As always, Beno's job is to trouble others. And this time he came to ride the Emperor's car. He wanted to return to Jakarta together with the Emperor to start his work in the factory.
The emperor was wearing clothes after bathing. “Yes, I've already got it. We parted.”
“I heard from Zada, you were looking for Khanza last night at the club. Would you like to refer him?”
The emperor was silent.
“What are you looking for Khanza to get to the club if not for wanting to get back to him? Are there still important things to discuss besides the referral request?” asked Beno who was lying on the mattress while snacking on crackers.
“Hey, better sit down! Don't lie down like that! Details of your crackers are scattered on my bed!”
Beno chuckles. He moved and sat on the floor. Mouths are non-stop chewing. “You can tell me about your problem. But that's also if you think that I am trustworthy and able to provide solutions and advice for you. But if you think I'm not capable of any benefit, it's better not. I know that humans can be wise when deciding on other people's problems. But not necessarily wise when hit by problems in his own life.”
“Yes, I did invite Khanza to re-build our household. But..”
“But what?” cut Beno.
“But Khanza refused. He still wants to live free.”
“Actually you invited Khanza to refer it for what reason?”
The emperor rolled his eyes.
“You have the influence of Jihan to defend your household?” guess Beno.
Emperor shakes.
“You are afraid of being crowned a bad man in the eyes of God for failing to foster a household?” guess Beno again.
The emperor nodded again.
“Then?”
“I just realized that there is room for Khanza in my heart.”
Beno smiled broadly. “You fell in love with her?”
“Maybe.”
“Kok possible? You've been in love. You should understand how you feel.”
“Then, how about Jihan? Have you made up your mind to him?”
“He asked me to choose in a good way. Whatever the decision, he will accept it. And it looks like I'd rather keep Khanza.”
“Although it looks the same as licking your own saliva, so?”
“In my guidance dictionary, there is no such term, Beno. God always gives wide opportunities to all those who are guilty of improving themselves, including in my business.”
“So, why do you think Khanza rejected you? Shouldn't he accept you because he knows you're rich? He likes rich men, doesn't he?”
“Which is clear, he still wants to be alone he said. He still wants to be free.”
Beno nods.
The emperor sat down on the floor. Her shadow recalls when Khanza sits sweetly at the club table drinking. “So far, I only realized one thing, I was not willing to see Khanza have such a free life. I want to take him to hijrah. Really want. I was angry and upset to see Khanza as he is today. I felt like I was wasting my chance to be her husband. I failed.”
“You did not fail. Everything can still be repaired. What was the reason you told Khanza when you asked him to refer?”
The emperor simply raised an eyebrow. He almost forgot what he said when he expressed his desire to refer to Khanza.
“Did you reveal that you love her?” ask Beno.
“No.”
“Well, that was your fault. Why don't you express your feelings to her. Good thing she can accept you when you say that you love her.”
“Do you think it will be able to change things?” The emperor asked.
“Sure. When you know you love her, it could be that her heart space will also open for you.”
“But he doesn't love me. My confession will not change the state of his heart.”
“You are wrong, Emperor. Your confession will at least make Khanza understand that you love him. Khanza's feelings will also be different when you admit it. Believe that! Although Khanza was judes, bars and fierce, but he still had a conscience. He's human. She chick. Woman has no limit whatsoever in dote, she can treat your finger wound even though both her own hands are injured.”
Emperor chuckles. He ruffled Beno's kriwil hair with a single swab. Then stand up. “Already, let's hurry if you want to come with me. We are back in Jakarta.”
***
Seriate