The False Lover the Culun
Chapters 18. Be the real Sherina Kanza
It's time I started loving myself.
True if self-introspection is a good thing and brings good benefits.
Only if it is done right, that is, by not blaming yourself.
Start by making peace with yourself,
And stay away from all the things that can make me fall back.
Prepare yourself, for the real me will return.
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# SHERINA POV #
“Sherina Kanza S.Psi”
“Mother see right? I have managed to reach the first step to reach my dream,” My words with a cheerful smile in front of Mother.
And unexpectedly, Mother returned my smile.
After almost 4 years, or if you try to count maybe at least about 192 times my meeting with Mother, finally today Mother responds to my words.
It was a good development and it added to my happiness.
I took Mother into my arms, and I felt her hands squeezing the ends of my clothes on both sides.
“What a Mother, just slow down. For me to see a healthy and happy mother is enough,”, I said.
“But didn't Mommy ever say you want to have an apartment? Now I live there, although not yet mine, but I will work on it, for Mother's sake, so get well soon,”.
And this is the truth.
The apartment that Harsya and Rafie gave as a graduation gift, I think it was too luxurious. There's no way I'm just taking it.
But because I did not want to disappoint the two, I finally decided to pay with a repayment. Thank goodness they agreed.
Scroll the clock on my wrist, 30 minutes from the time I agreed to meet someone.
“Mother, sorry today I have to go home early,” I have an appointment with someone.
After saying goodbye to Mother, Bu Ayu, and also the other hall managers, I immediately put forward a pink matic motorbike that has been faithful to accompany me in addition to Harsya and Rafie.
My phone rang, but for safety I chose to ignore it. I'm sure only Harsya or Rafie would want to know where I am.
The longer the two were like an older brother who was possessive of his younger sister.
It's been a week since Harsya went to Jakarta to see Rafie. Normally, the three of us would go together on weekends just to unwind, but not if the destination was Harsya or Rafie to Jakarta. I will refuse to come.
And because of that too I finally dared to accept someone's request to meet.
“I'm 5 minutes late, my inner” when the motor has parked well.
I set my feet to enter a cafe, still at 4 pm so it is only natural that this cafe is still quiet. Because young people like me are now preparing for Sunday night.
“Sherina!”
I'm looking for where the voice of a man I've never met in a year.
“Pak Sadewa,” reply me when netra we finally meet.
I realized that now I smiled as I walked towards my former lecturer who was standing waiting for my presence.
“Sorry if you wait a long time,”.
“Just relax, I also just arrived,” reply.
I just nodded, inwardly eager to refute his confession which I doubted the truth. Especially when I saw the drink glass on the table was empty.
“How are you, Sher?” ask Mr. Sadewa.
“Thank God I'm fine Sir,” I replied.
“What's your busy life now?”
“Hemm... I just exposed the gel...” My speech was interrupted by Mr. Sadewa, his bad habits are not exemplary this turned out to be the same.
“I know if you have passed S1. That's why I'm back,”.
“What?” pekikku in heart, “What this former lecturer of mine wants.”
“What are you now working?” tanyakanya.
“Yes, working in several course institutions,” I replied honestly.
“Why not continue S2? Don't you aspire to be a lecturer?”
“Bapak forgot if for college S2 need cost?” sindirku.
Mr. Sadewa responded with a laugh. It's always been this way. Mr. Sadewa has never been offended by my sometimes razor-sharp remarks.
“Why not try the scholarship program again like before?” tanyakanya.
“Mauku is also like that sir, but unfortunately there are rarely campuses that provide scholarships for S2,” levels, I explained.
“Rare, doesn't mean there isn't. Right?”
I nodded in agreement to his words.
What Mr. Sadewa said just now is very difficult for me to believe, because I asked this several times but the answer remains the same, if there is no scholarship program for S2 level.
“If not sure, you just come and prove it yourself,” he continued as if he knew what was bothering me.
Even so I still mute. The incident 1.5 years ago still makes me hesitant to deal with Mr. Sadewa again.
“On behalf of Kiara, I'm sorry,” said Mr. Sadewa suddenly.
I became suspicious if he had the ability to read other people's minds.
“I've forgiven Bu Kiara,” to be honest.
“Although that's the case, still I have to explain everything to you,” replied.
“My divorce with Kiara has nothing to do with you Sherina, so never feel shy.”
“Our marriage both happened just like that, it was when we were very young, promiscuity made us make mistakes. It gets worse because we did it in a state of unconsciousness, the influence of drinks, and not because of love.”
“But the presence of Zaskia we must not blame or regret, that is why we decided to take responsibility by getting married. But how hard we try to maintain the household is very difficult because there is no love. Kiara and I each attach great importance to the ego, chasing our dreams that were delayed, and ended up making Kia a victim due to our separation.”
I can see if Mr. Sadewa really regretted because finally his favorite daughter had to be hurt because of the separation of her parents.
“Already Sir, no need to continue the story if it is so painful,” I said.
“And thank you for your story, I can be free from one more guilt,”.
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All Mr. Sadewa's remarks that afternoon were true. Today I proved it, and I saw that there were already some people who had also signed up for the selection.
Only 3 out of 12 people who applied were declared graduates, including myself.
“Thank God, once again You show your greatness with the favors You gave me, my inner”.
New facts that I know if it turns out that Mr. Sadewa's parents are the owners of the university where I now study.
Although I passed the S2 scholarship selection, I still have to face 1 more exam. And it seems like it's pretty hard.
It has the support of my best friend, Harsya.
“Sherin, have you forgotten how the man's wife humiliated you?” Harsya.
“No... I still disagree. If it was just S2 tuition, I could also pay the entire cost. You don't have to deal with that guy anymore,”.
My eyes glazed over, for some reason I felt offended by Harsya's words.
“Thank you, you guys have helped me a lot. But for my education I will work on it myself.” My reply then left Harsya and Rafie
But a week later, Harsya came to see me and apologized. He finally supported and believed in my decision.
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Two years later, thanks to the support of Harysa, Rafie, and I can not deny Mr. Sadewa, I finally managed to complete my S2 education on time.
But this was not the end, but a new beginning, in a new chapter of my life.
It has been 2 months since I earned a Masters in Psychology (M.Psi), but until now I have not found a job.
I am still wiri in several course institutions, being for the university where I applied as a lecturer, rejecting me with various reasons.
I thought of Harsya's words when it was time for me to come out of hiding.
“What's wrong with my appearance? What matters is my ability, right?” I muttered in front of the large mirror in my room.
“Nothing's wrong Sherin, it's just that you should know that not everyone can agree with you,” Harsya surprised me.
I don't know since when he was there, suddenly Harsya was already standing in the doorway of my room.
“Now most people judge others starting from his appearance,” Harsya said.
“If their appearance is quite convincing, then they start to judge other things” he continued.
I stared back at the image of myself in the mirror, “Then what should I do?”
Harsya approached, first she removed my large glasses, then removed my hairpin until now my long black and long aura was loose.
“Look, just like this you are much different Rin,” said Harsya.
“How so? The decision is in your hands,” he continued.
I took a deep breath, “You won Yes... Please help me.”
Harsya Smile they are perfect, “Prepare, we will soon welcome the real Sherina.”
Harsya's laughter echoed throughout my room.
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My hiding time is over.
Bye Nana the geeky girl.
Welcome back Sherina Kanza.
Now it's time to take my step to the world.
⚘🍀⚘🍀 To be continue ⚘🍀⚘🍀