The Flower Of Eternity
Chapter 12: The Denial

Irene was still observing her newborn granddaughter. Beside him, Leon could see Irene holding back her tears.

"In addition to her red hair, everything on her face is a perfect replica of her father. The sweeter and adorable version, of course." Said Irene who felt atoned for her debt because when she gave birth to Xavier, Irene never had a chance to carry him. Her emerald eyes glazed over as she looked at the tiny baby. "You've prepared a name?" Ask later.

Tell Mother, if we have prepared the name because from the beginning we already know that the one who will be born is a Princess. Xavier's voice was heard.

So we agreed to use your name?

I like the name Anastasia. But you always win every time we argue. So. we agreed. Xavierra Yrene Isabelle de Gratina.

We should use your family name too.

Not necessary. This Imperial Leader is you, not me. Quickly tell Mom.

"I and Xavier have agreed to name him Xavierra. Xavierra Yrene Isabelle de Gratina del Norte le Grand." Said Anna.

I told you I didn't have to use my family name.

I told you, if we argue, I always win. Reply Anna.

Irene smiled at the name of her granddaughter. "Xavier would be so happy."

"He was happy. He can't wait to see our son. Although he can't come at this time, he will definitely be present later at the inauguration of our son's name announcement." Anna said cheerfully. Just imagining it had made him happy even though his entire body was sick and his strength drained away. Anna misses Xavier so much that the pain all over her body can seem to go away just by imagining Xavier is coming. She smiled brightly, impatiently waiting for her husband's arrival. Now they will be a complete and happy family.

But just then, the smile on Irene's face faded away. Leon even looked worried as he looked at Anna who was still smiling happily. Leon asks his mother to step down so that he can sit next to Anna who is still lying weakly. With great care Leon said, "Your Majesty..."

"Leon..." Irene hurriedly cut out her sentence. He nodded his head signaling his disapproval. "Leave it."

"can't. We can't let it go on like this."

"Later. Slowly. He needs time. She just gave birth. It's a hard time for him."

"You don't have to worry about that." Anna said, trying to calm down. "I told Xavier that the announcement of our son's name would be held the day after tomorrow. So he knows. He'll come by then."

Just be careful if you're not there on the day of the announcement of his name! Said Anna.

Anna heard her laughter. You're so creepy, honey. I'm always there for you. I am in your heart. You should know that better than anyone.

"He won't come, Your Majesty." Said Leon. His voice is cold. Anna saw Leon's hands clenched over her lap.

"He's coming because I asked him to come. I might announce it myself. This child is our son. So he's coming."

"He can't come." Leon emphasized every word. His facial expression turned serious.

"Leon.. stop." Irene was about to mediate with them, but Leon forbade her, signaling Irene to stay away. Meanwhile, little Xavierra started crying in Irene's arms.

"Why? Did he tell you straight away that he couldn't come? What's the business in the Northern Region still not finished?" Ask Anna.

"Airan in the Northern Territory?" Leon smiled bitterly. "In the North, yes..." Deuteronomy. He then laughed cynically. "Is that what you're putting on your head right now, Your Majesty? You said business in Montreux, then in Westeria... Now in the North?"

Irene patted the shoulders of her emotional eldest son. "Leon, it's been..."

"Why do you want to go on like this, Tsarina Anastasia?" Leon ignored his mother's words and began to raise his tone. Leon knew he couldn't behave like that. Not only because Anna is now Tsarina and she has to respect her, but also because Anna has just given birth and is still very weak both physically and mentally.

"Why are you yelling at me like that?"

"Leon..." Irene held her son's hand. While the other hand was busy holding his grandson who was still crying. Leon turned to look at the tiny Xavierra who seemed to know what was going on around him. As she stared at the little baby, even Anna could see Leon holding back her tears.

Leon let go of his mother's hand. "He must be aware, General Irene. You were once a queen so you must know very well, a leader of a country must be strong for his people. She is not only the mother of this child, she is the mother of millions of her people. And right now the people need him more than anything." Leon looked back at Anna who was still confused by her anger. "Follow the truth, Your Majesty. You can cry, grieve, scream, get angry. Do as you please! But you have to accept the truth!"

"You're why the hell from earlier? Why should I cry on such a happy day? This is a day we have been waiting for a long time. Xavier and I have long been looking forward to the day of our daughter's birth. We argue about his name almost every night. Even just last night he was betting that our daughter would look more like him than me. And look at it! Turns out he's right." Anna grabs Leon's hand, her eyes full of hope to the point that Leon has to turn her face away. "Leon... Can you just pick her up? He'll want to see our daughter's face soon."

"Why? Is the matter in the Northern Region so serious that it can't be left out for a moment?"

Leon looked back at Anna, "There is no problem whatsoever in the Northern Region at the moment, Your Majesty. The problem there has long been solved. If there's a problem there, I'm the one who shouldn't be here. I'm the one who should have gone there. Not Xavier."

"Then why?"

Leon knelt down beside Anna's bed. He looked down as he did not dare to look at her while saying so. His voice trembled as he said, "With all due respect, Your Majesty, don't make me the one to remind you again. Don't make me the cruel person who needs to wake you up. It's also very difficult for me. We both grieve."

"Talk clearly, Grand Duke Winterthur. Why can't he come?"

Leon looked up, looking at Anna who was still waiting for his explanation with a puzzled look on her face.

"Xavier is dead." Said Leon. When he said it, his voice was as slow as a whisper. But everyone in the room could hear it clearly.

Anna shakes.

Those words sounded very unreasonable to him. How could Xavier have died when Anna was still chatting with him. Xavier promised not to die. Morta's poison was also completely gone from his body thanks to Ludwig's antidote. So Leon's words made no sense at all. Like a mere lie.

But Anna's heart almost stopped beating upon hearing those words. His blood seemed to stop flowing and the next words that emerged from Leon's mouth, increasingly strange to him. It's like Leon's speaking a foreign language he doesn't understand.

"Two weeks ago. You don't remember, Your Majesty?"

Anna raised her hand to cover her ears. It was just a word, so why would Anna have trouble breathing when she heard it. Her chest is tight for some reason. His eyes were burning like they were going to bleed. Anna suddenly felt she was not there. Until Anna was sure she must be dreaming. But why does it hurt so much. Not only was his entire body sick, but also his heart like it had just been destroyed. Anna believes Leon is lying to her. Leon's words couldn't be digested. The world seemed to be circling and Leon's voice sounded increasingly faint.

"You were right in front of him when he died, Your Majesty. You see it more clearly than anyone. He died saving you! You already know that, so stop acting like this!"

Irene slapped her eldest son. It was so loud that the sound of her slap made Anna shocked and come to a realization. "Don't go too far, Leon! His condition is still very weak. He still couldn't accept the reality."

"But until when? He must accept the reality immediately! It's been two weeks since Xavier's death, and instead of improving he's increasingly denying it! Didn't you hear his words? He thinks Xavier is alive. He must rise soon for the sake of his people! If it wasn't us, who else would have made him aware? He has no one else but us right now."

Xavier's... Leon was getting very strange. He told a very unreasonable lie. Leon doesn't usually lie to me. I don't understand why he said such a horrible thing. But I don't want my mother-in-law to hit her. Can you come and stop their fight?

But Xavier didn't say anything to her. The voice he so longed for suddenly disappeared.

"He's not dead, Leon..." Anna said with a trembling voice. "He's not dead yet." Anna repeated, this time in a more stable voice for Leon to believe her words. So that what he says becomes the truth.

You're not dead yet, so answer me! Talk to me! Don't leave me! Keep your promise, you liar!

Anna, honey... The soft voice sounded again. It sounded so close that Anna thought Xavier was in the room right beside her, whispering right in her ear. I never really left you, baby.

"He's not dead yet." Anna said again. This time more to himself. He tried to make himself believe in those words. You're still with me. Tell me I'm right.

My darling... Ii'm sorry... That's Xavier's voice. Anna knew it was Xavier's voice. So why did Leon say he was dead? Anna is so convinced Xavier is still alive and that Leon is wrong.

Don't apologize, Xavier. You're not dead yet. You're still talking to me so you're not dead. No need to apologize, just come here now. Need you.

You haven't let me go, so I can't really leave you.

Anna looked at Leon and Irene alternately. A confused and injured expression was painted on his face. Leon just looked down at the floor not daring to look at Anna, while Irene started to shed tears.

"Call right, Leon? He's not dead." But when he said that his eyes hurt. She had been tired of crying for the past two weeks, and it seemed like her tears were still not drained away. So he came back shedding tears. "He's not dead yet. He's not dead!" Anna started banging and screaming as reality and memory hit her. But even after he remembered it, he could still deny it. "I'm still talking to him, Leon. This afternoon in the meeting room, this morning at breakfast, last night, and the days before. I still hear his voice, Leon. He's still alive. She hasn't ma—“

His words stopped as Leon hugged him. "Sorry.I'm sorry. I understand you still can't accept his death. Its alright. Just slow down." Leon said as he patted his back to calm him down. But Anna's tears had already been spilled without being stopped.

Xavier's death still didn't feel real to him even after two weeks had passed. A moment before Xavier was still there, breathing, living, and then the next second he was gone forever. And even though Anna was trying to wake up from that nightmare—if it was indeed a nightmare—she would only wake up into another nightmare. Because now he lives in that nightmare for the rest of his life.

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