The Murder of the Beloved
Chapter 20

But Dinda realized, that she herself felt bad to say it. Talking to Della had a different impression. But his mother was the one who would be directly affected by his complaint about Bram, let alone uncover his thoughts and conclusions. He also realized, if a bad thought or prejudice is expressed in words, it can be impressed as slander. So he decided to shut up.

But her silence made Lilis curious. "Come on say, Din. Why do you think so badly of Om Bram? Is she...?"

"Lho, who says I think ugly about Om Bram? That's my own mother who said."

"But..."

"Ah, mom. I was just saying that Aunt Irene was a girl and that Om Bram was a man, it was appropriate that I would rather be close to a fellow woman than a stranger."

"Oh, so." Lilis felt no relief. Then he remembered another word from Dinda. "Why don't you like him?"

"Ah, mom is so chatty. I told you my instincts said that. There may be an explanation. Instinct is instinct."

"Without a reason?"

Dinda just shrugged her shoulders.

"I remember you never talked about instincts when your father was a bitch. Doesn't your instinct show up about what your father's gonna do?"

Dinda shrugged her shoulders again.

Lilis looked at Dinda curiously. "Why do I have the feeling that you're hiding something?" said.

Dinda laughed and looked back at her mother. "Does she have instincts too?" he retaliated.

"Why don't you talk about it with Om Bram so you don't get confused?"

Lilis stunned. Such a proposition was something impossible. How could he have discussed the matter with Bram, if he was the point? Bram could be offended. He loved Bram. Surely Dinda mocked him, knowing full well he would never do that.

But Dinda did not understand her mother's gaze. He laughed because he won the debate. Indeed, he was also irritated because he considered the approach made by his mother was a ploy to persuade him to be familiar with Bram. Does his mother think he can be wooed in nice clothes? Similarly, the statement of his mother who wants to be close and familiar with him as before. It was certainly one of the roads heading in the same direction. When it is familiar then the decay process begins. Precisely with a little away as he did so far he felt easier to avoid. If he wants to avoid Bram, he must also avoid his mother. He became lonely in that way, but fortunately he was closer to his father and Irene. They can be substitutes. But of course it does not mean that he has betrayed his mother.

The conversation between mother and son ended just like that. Each returns to their own activities. But for Lilis, the impression of the conversation produced a profound effect. He found it difficult to get close to Dinda again and was saddened by her. Then it was felt that Bram was the only person in the world on whom he depended and leaned. That is what a husband means to his wife. So he must also try as much as possible to please and make the husband happy. Until then Bram never asked the results of his thoughts about his idea the other day. But Lilis finds out, that Bram hopes he agrees. He is confident that his agreement will make Bram more loving. Yes, he has made his decision!

Dinda never knew what her mother was thinking. His instincts are not there. He concentrated himself solely on Bram. Several times he still caught Bram's naughty gaze on him, whether it was a gaze that led to a certain part of his body or a gaze containing scorn. When caught and he retorted with a sharp and angry highlight he could catch a thin smile playing on Bram's lips. But all of that is vague. How could such things be used as a concrete proof of the man's personality? The man could have been evasive by saying that he was just fantasizing. Can it be proven that his gaze was naughty or contained scorn? Can you be assured that he was smiling after being caught?

After the door of her room was fitted with a vacuum, Dinda never again saw her door handle twitching as if someone was willing to open from the outside. But in that case he did not wake up to a slow sound. Lately he was easy to fall asleep and sleep well. It was because he felt tired by intensive training. But he never sleeps too much, more than enough. As with eating, when full the body refuses to enter food again, as well as sleep. He woke up early feeling refreshed and lost all sleepiness. He actually feels dizzy if he continues to fall asleep even though he is not sleepy anymore.

Dinda estimates, of course, Bram knows that the door to his room can not be opened again after one try. Bram could have investigated the cause when he wasn't home. The door to his room could not be locked from the outside. So after finding out, why does Bram bother to push his door handle at night?

The mind is calming. He will not be disturbed at night. Getting enough sleep makes him more excited and optimistic. Coupled with the condition of his fresh and powerful body, he felt no need to fear Bram anymore. Sometimes challenging thoughts arise. If Bram dares to do something, as a concrete and clear action, especially if there is a witness, then his mother will believe what kind of man he married. But as long as it's just the glare and distraction of the door handles at night, who's going to believe it, except for Aunt Della? Dinda had imagined various countermeasures if Bram dared to disturb him.

He'll kick it and punch his nose. Yeah, nose. He said the nose is a sensitive part of the face that bleeds easily when traumatized. Feel later. Does that man think he's a weak, helpless little girl, so easily abused? But precisely with such an assumption, he can give a surprising surprise. The man was indeed large and of course also powerful, but he himself was also an advantage.

But Bram did not show any forward motion in the form of concrete action. The obvious advance was the increased frequency of glare disturbances and scornful expressions. Even his thick lips also come into play, for example, reddened like kissing motion, or issuing a disgusting sigh. No day is missed without such distractions.

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Like n his comments yes.