The Wife Who Escaped
I can't end it like this.

“Kirana lives such a life, a life where no one can be trusted or relied upon.”

Reynand's face hardened. His heart ached as if his head was forming.

"Leave Kirana alone......"

"......."

“Let him live happily as he wills.”

Rachelle persuaded him with a soothing yet powerful tone.

“You know that he is not the right person for us.”

"......"

“I also think that Kirana is a strong person.”

"......"

“But it's just our greed. It was greed that forced Kirana to conform to us and pushed her to the brink.”

Every time Rachelle kept talking, pain appeared in Reynand's eyes. Because everything he said was not wrong.

Rachelle looked at Reynand who was standing still with a stern expression and said.

“Think. Kirana was only 22 years old when she got married."

"......"

“Usually at that age, it's time to go for a walk, date, study, and have fun….. Notya just keep quiet in the corner of the house and always wait for when will get pregnant.”

His voice became a little stronger.

“Not everyone is strong and tough like you. kirana just pretends to be strong, she is by no means a strong person.”

Rachelle asked with earnest eyes. It was a request not only for Kirana, but also for Reynand.

“Kirana does not fit into our family.”

"......"

"Leave it alone . So that he can live happily."

A cold wind blew between the two people. Reynand who listened to Rachelle's words with a stern face, opened her mouth.

“I know what you say.”

He said with bitter eyes.

“Indeed, No one can be trusted or relied upon as long as Kirana stays with me.”

"....."

“She is also not a strong and firm person like me“

"......"

"I understand everything.”

Now I know. Spending hours in an empty house without Kirana, I became aware of her suffering and loneliness. Not that he was strong, but he was just holding him back. Reynand bit her lips and shook her head.

“But I can't end it like this either.”

There was a sense of despair in the voice he spoke.

“Even if I finish it, I have to see it for myself.”

“I will release him when I see with my own eyes whether he is happy.”

Just once....... ....Now I only wish I could see your face once. I have no intention of scolding you for the reason you left me, nor do I have any intention of questioning you about the whole story.

The face I always see when I get home, that beautiful, kind face... I would love to meet you even if only for a moment.

Rachelle's eyes were worried as she looked at Reynand's face. This was the first time he had seen Reynand make an expression like this. Rachelle's heart ached as her emotions were conveyed clearly.

“If you got a call from Kirana, please let me know.” Reynand said to Rachelle

"Excuse me."

Reynand turned around, opened the front door, and went inside. Rachelle, who was left alone, looked at the gate she entered and sighed.

Rachelle came here with the intention of telling her to stop looking for Kirana, but when she saw Reynand's face, she felt sad.

He muttered softly with an embarrassed expression on his face.

“What should I do?”

****

'Klakk's'

Reynand opened the door and looked inside the dark house.

The empty house was cold and quiet. Although it had been more than a month since Kirana disappeared, the silence was difficult to get used to.

Reynand took off her suit and loosened her tie with a somewhat tired expression. And head to the bathroom. After the sound of water running for a while, he came out wearing only a bathrobe. Reynand brushed her wet hair back and went to the kitchen. Then he took the whiskey out of the alcohol storage cabinet.

Reynand heads to the living room with a glass of ice and whiskey. He sipped whiskey in the glass. A bitter sensation spread to his throat.

Reynand was busy emptying her glass before pouring another drink for herself. He drank a thick whiskey glass by glass, but he just felt nauseous and his mind was fine.

Reynand had not slept well for a long time. He drank alcohol every night thinking it would be better to fall asleep drunk, but at some point it wasn't easy. The more he drank, the slower he got drunk.

I hate lying alone in a big bed. It would be better to get drunk so I fall asleep on the living room couch without knowing when I fall asleep.

Reynand raised her whiskey glass once again. After drinking a few times, his vision became a little blurred. As his gaze became blurred, a person's delicate shadow appeared.

‘Drink this. He said honey water is good for getting drunk.'

It was Kirana's face that gave her honey water when she was drunk a few days ago.

'If you're drunk, you should call me. That way I'll be here soon…'

The meaning contained in those words. Kirana was so waiting for me that she ran every time I called her.

'Why do you drink alcohol?'

I miss those worried eyes.

'Is it because the work is difficult?'

'Or.. is it because of me?'

My heart ached remembering the memories that came to my mind.

Reynand spoke to the woman glittering before her eyes.

"alright. It's because of you."

"That's because of you.... Kirana."

A voice that could not reach others was scattered in the air.

Kirana's shimmering shadow slowly became dim. Reynand's gaze went around looking for Kirana who had disappeared.

The living room, where the illusion disappeared, was completely destroyed. Only a terrible silence came back to welcome him.

Reynand covered her head with a sad face. He closed his eyes tightly as the pain overwhelmed his entire body.

I want to see Kirana. I feel like I'm going crazy to want to see it soon. My chest felt tight and I couldn't breathe properly. I can't last even a minute or even a second here.

Reynand took her phone and called Kirana.

[The number you are going to cannot answer the call, so the call will be sent to a voicemail. Call charges will be charged after the beep.]

Reynand calls her every day, but she still can't hear Kirana's voice.

Reynand sighed and looked through the photo album on her phone. He's looking for if there's a photo of Kirana, but there's nothing. The same thing happened with the video. Laughter comes out.

A husband who doesn't have a single picture of his wife on his cell phone. We've been together for two years, but we've never taken a single photo together except our wedding photos.

Reynand's eyes widened as she looked at her phone files with a wry smile. There was a voicemail file in Kirana's voice mail that she had never seen before.

When Reynand saw the name of the file, there was a date written on it, the day Mama Kirana died. He remembered that day, back then he was so busy that he didn't even know there was a voice message like this.

Reynand opened the file and stuck the phone to his ear. After a moment of silence, he heard a voice that he had long wanted to hear.

[It's me.]

Iru's voice was Kirana's voice in haste.

[There's something I want to tell you right away.]

[Please contact me as soon as you hear this.]

I could feel uneasiness and trembling in the voice he spoke.

[I'll wait.]

That was the end of his words. Those words were the last message Kirana left for him.

Reynand's eyes twitched. Endless regret ruled over him.

My heart stiffened as I imagined the Kirana I was vaguely waiting for after leaving this message. Kirana is always looking forward to. He waited for a reply that never came, He waited for me in an empty house, not knowing when I would come home. He endured all sorts of hardships and waited for the birth of a child. Living a life with nothing to rely on, and waiting for when her mother wakes up.

I don't know about that terrible loneliness. Leaving Kirana alone in this secluded space and just maintaining her place.

Reynand dialed Kirana's phone number again.

[The number you are going to cannot answer the call, so the call will be sent to a voicemail. Call charges will be charged after the beep.]

As a loud mechanical sound rang out in his ear, Reynand looked at his phone. He lowered his head helplessly, and his eyes became wet.

It's too late now. Kirana was not waiting for him anymore. And the long and lonely wait she endured became her part.

****

Mats... Mats... Mats...

Kirana opened her eyes when she heard a small knock on the window. Looking at the dark and silent surroundings, it seemed like it was still dawn.

Kirana immediately got up and looked out the window. Soft rain drops fall. It often rains in the area where Kirana lives. Instead of heavy rain, what happens is that spatter like occasionally stops repeatedly.

Kirana lay in bed. He closed his eyes, but he couldn't sleep. After going back and forth a few times, Kirana finally got back up.

It's a sunny morning, but a quiet night like this. I tend to think a lot and get lost in thought. I keep thinking about things from the past.

Kirana got up and turned on the lamp beside the bed.

As my mind deepened, it would be better if I read a book or looked for something to focus on.

Kirana opened the drawer where the books were kept.

Among the books he composed, he picked up a book related to the history of fine art. And just as she was about to close the drawer, Kirana's eyes were fixed on one place. There's a box in the innermost part of the closet.

Kirana took out the item that covered the box and opened the box. Inside the box were items that Kirana had brought from Indonesia.

Kirana put out an album among her things. The album contains photographs taken by Sarah when she was a child. The album is full of photos of little Kirana Sarah as a young girl.

She laughed the whole time looking at him, but she was also crying. She misses Sarah and wants to meet her. If possible, he wants to go back to days like in the photo.

Back to the time when Sarah was everything to him...He wants to go back to a time when no one knew about him.

Kirana wiped her wet eyes. He has more days to live than in the past. The desire must end with the desire itself.

I need to stop thinking about the past and think about the future.

Kirana tried to put the album in the box, and stared one place for a moment.

"......"

Her eyes were on the phone in the box.

Kirana turned it off when she left Indonesia, and never turned it on again.

Kirana picked up her phone and looked at it for a while.

How many people were looking for me after I left?

First of all, the one who called the most was Grandma. Because they are the ones who are the most sad because Kirana left the SF family. Even now, Grandma might curse me for leaving the house without saying a word.

Furthermore, I don't know who is looking for me the most. The Chairman and Mama-in-law must be grateful that I left first. And the rest of the family was also very happy that I disappeared.

Because in the beginning, I was the one who was never considered to exist. There is no one who is always in touch with me, so no one will look for me. The one who spent the most time with me was probably housekeeper Dan Reynand...

As she thought about it, Kirana felt her heart sink.

I don't know why my chest feels uncomfortable and claustrophobic when I think of Reynand.

Rey's.... How many times did he call me?

During our marriage, she was the number one person to call or text me first. Even the SMS I sent was mostly sent automatically which said

[I am in a meeting and cannot receive this message right now]

There is no hope for him. Even if he finds me, it's only for a moment.

Therefore, the right action is to quickly remove them as well.

Kirana put her phone deeper into the box and covered it with various objects.

I want time to pass quickly. Until past memories fade and I can't remember them even if I try.

I wish this would go faster.