Hot Couple: Inspiration From God (I Love You, Ustadz!)
Strong, Zahra....

What I'm experiencing is quite heavy, even very heavy I guess. I had an accident with severe physical injuries, had a miscarriage, was treated plus had to celebrate Lebaran day in the hospital with a patient shirt. Halal bihalal fellow nuclear family whose happiness becomes imperfect. And the hardest PR for me is when I always have to try to show that I'm strong and in good shape. I try to eat must be unappetizing, I must resist crying even though my eyes are often glazed, and I must distract myself in various ways. Not one or two days, but days.

At first, I tried watching television, but what shows could catch my attention? What I have in mind is back. Food cannot be an escape. I can't spend so much food, there will be times when we feel full or tired. Same with teaching. Although reading the Qur'an was hard-headed, I could not keep reading it all day, every minute I went through. So also about general knowledge, both in terms of Islami or general science, I am not a connoisseur and reader of such a part of science. As for chatting, I was afraid, I was not wanting to talk, afraid of flowing there as well.

So, after almost two days, that afternoon - my mother-in-law was praying asar, I complained to Mas Ilham that I was bored.

"So?" ask Mas Ilham. "You what? Want to buy a novel?"

I'm shaking. "Read the novel must be in a state of calm mind. Let's just focus on imagining the story."

"So what do you want?"

"My phone."

"Nope. You said you didn't want to communicate with outsiders. Later someone will contact you, keep talking about.... about this, how?"

I frowned.

"I bought you a new tablet, will you?"

Eh? I can already smile. "You..," I said spoiled.

"But the promise, should not download social media applications other than youtube."

Lo, huh? Automatic manyun. I understand and should not have reacted that way.

There's no choice, is there? So, yes, the deal. Mas Ilham immediately contacted Ikram, asking him to buy me a new tablet.

Finally, I spent my days with various offline games and - in the supervision of Mas Ilham. He will diligently check the new tablet and make sure that there is no social media application that I download. Even I was not allowed to open google, let alone to find out about the accident we experienced. Let it be a police matter, he said.

I nodded because I actually understood Mas Ilham's concern about my psychic and mental condition, he was afraid that I would continue to grieve. But apparently, that's not the only reason. There's more: Mas Ilham explained it just before we got home from the hospital.

Sad, broken, irritated, annoyed, resentful, and all the sickening things slipped into my heart when I knew that it was: out there, the gossip of the people towards me was warm again. Salsabila Azzahra is rumored to be karmic citizens because they deny conceiving a fetus outside marriage, or other rumors, that Salsabila Azzahra may be grateful for the accident that aborted her fetus. So, there's no need to gossip about her pregnancy anymore.

But this was a terrible accident woy! I love my baby too!

I want to scream like that to whoever makes me angry and my heartache is getting worse.

But this sanity is still inside. What am I doing that for? It would only add to the long list of public gossip over me.

"I told you about this so that you would be strong, and so that you would not be surprised later when you heard this news after we came home. Not to make your tears flow again. Please, Zahraku is a tough woman, right? Smile, Zahra. I'm always here with you. We can get through this storm together. Can you, right, honey?"

Always could. It can't possibly not be. I wiped my tears and held my head up. "Give me a hug, please? Give me a hug, Mas."

The Inspiration smiled. "Anything for my wife, plus one kiss."

And we know that we are strong. Life is a struggle, right?

The struggles....