Last Page Story of Shabira
20. Mental Disorders
An hour had passed, and Shabira lay down on her bed. His gaze was still staring at the brightly lit laptop screen in front of his face. The fingers keep moving, pressing one by one the keyboard keys quickly. Until this moment, the girl was still trying to eliminate back the resentment in her heart.
There were quite a number of events that he went through today, and it constantly irritated Shabira when she remembered them. Until now, the girl had not known what decision the teachers had made for her. Shabira did not want to think too much about it, because she no longer cared about what would happen next.
The sound of knocking on the door distracts Shabira, the girl just turns her head without changing her position. Suddenly, the door of the room was forcefully opened by someone from outside. Shabira gasped, then got out of bed. Now Papa Antonio was standing in front of him, staring with his flat face.
"Gapain you?" ask Antonio.
Shabira shook her head, slightly clueless. "Nothing!" the answer.
Not as easy as Antonio believes, the man turned to look at the laptop on the bed. "You're studying?" tanyanya took the laptop.
"Not Pah" Shabira replied hesitantly, though it was true.
"Then?" Antonio stared at the laptop in confusion, a line of elongated writing stamped on the still-lit screen. "Why did you waste time just writing something so insignificant?"
"It doesn't matter?" Shabira frowned, not understanding her Papa's words.
"What kind of "writing is this? Rather than you write like this, you would rather take the time to study. You forget, your school grades are still far from perfect!" snapped Antonio. He who initially did not want to get angry, now even ended up scolding Shabira because the girl was busy wasting time just for something useless.
"Distant Papa said? My grades are ninety and Papa still says it's far from perfect. Then how are you, another person who is proud of the value results under ninety? Will Papa also call them trash?" reply Shabira bravely.
"Close your mouth, you dare now answer Papa's words. What do you think? Papa always thinks about you, wants the best for you. But what's your reply, is this how you treat me as your Papa?"
Antonio clenched his hand, then slammed the laptop still in his hand. Seeing Shabira's current behavior, it made her very angry. His jaw hardened, along with Shabira's deepening eyes. The girl boldly looked back at Antonio, without feeling any fear at all.
"Think of me Papa said? When did Papa ever think of me? When did Papa notice me like a father to his daughter? I had depression, anxiety and mental disorders and almost attempted suicide at the time. Does Papa know about it?" Shabira shakes a sliced. "No, Papa never knew that!" press it.
"I'm almost crazy with no one to know, including my own real Papa! But what did Papa think? So far Papa only think about values, values, values and values. Even if Papa never wants to know the true state of me!"
Shabira turned to approach the nightstand, picking up a small bottle she used to keep in the drawer. In the bottle, there is a sedative that Shabira always consumes when experiencing anxiety disorder first. The girl had indeed checked her mental health without the knowledge of the family.
"Do you know what this is?" Shabira shows the small bottle in front of her Papa. "This is the sedative I always take when Papa just scolded me. All this time I was bullied, exiled by everyone. But what did Pala do? Papa even contributed to give a burden for me and make my mental disorder even more so!"
"Papa know? No matter how close we are now, it doesn't mean that Papa knows everything about me. Even as small as that, Papa doesn't know how I really am." Shabira said in a low tone, but with great emphasis in each of her words.
"Shabira," said Antonio to approach. A sense of regret suddenly burst into Antonio's heart.
Antonio plans to visit Shabira due to a bullying problem that almost gets Shabira expelled from school. Feeling guilty, Antonio wants to get a little closer to his daughter, in order to find out the true heart of Shabira. But because of his selfishness, Antonio actually made a new distance by provoking the anger of Shabira.
Shabira raised her hand, gesturing for Papa Antonio not to approach. "Before I came to this house, Papa said he wanted to make me happy. Papa says he wants to accept me for who I am, and wants to make up for all of Papa's past mistakes. But what is it? All this time I was just getting pressure. Papa always compares me to Papa's favorite child, the result of Papa's love story with Mama Shinta." He chuckles miris.
"Ah yes, I forgot. Isn't Mama Shinta the reason Papa left me and Mommy?" Shabira asked, though she herself could already guess the answer.
"Shabira, that's not what Papa meant. You know, Papa's been doing you a lot of wrongs, but you should know, Papa's doing all this for your own good."
Antonio looked at his daughter guiltily, now he realized all the wrongs he had done. The intention that originally wanted to make Shabira happy, now ended the opposite. Antonio realized, all this time he had been wrong in taking steps.
At first, he thought the way he had been doing was the best move for Shabira. But unexpectedly, it ended up making Shabira experience many problems in her life. Having a mental disorder? Antonio never even expected it would happen to his daughter.
Forgive Papa, Shabira. Papa is a useless father, even to understand what you want Papa can't.
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While waiting for HTKS up, stop by first yuk to the cool work below.
Title: Household
Marlon : MinNami
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