Liebe Zu Maiza's
Palpitates

"I'm in love?" I deliberately asked that question again so that Ayu and Daniza would withdraw the accusation. They were too quick to draw any conclusions on the strange feeling that was seeping through this entire chest cavity.

"Yes, you are in love" Daniza said.

"Are I in love?" I'm trying to convince myself that this raging feeling isn't falling in love. Just an over-indulgence.

"Then what's Za called, if not in love?" Ayu asked back.

"I'm just happy, someone has helped me" I said.

"Who just helped you?"

Ah, Ayu's question made this caution tremble. Who just helped me? Ayu is curious about my secret angel.

"Let's guess who?"

"Oh my God, Zaaa .. that's Esdeh's child's toy guessing, it's not the age of our kayak," I think it's just Daniza's wits being too curious about the wonderful event that just happened to me.

"Hmmm... Do you remember that no one helped me when Azmi took us to the cafeteria?"

"Remember,"

"The one who gave Azmi the novel, right?" Ayu clarifies.

"Don't tell me he's the one!" suspicious Daniza.

"Yes," I nodded despite the sense that was stirring when I remembered it.

"The class's brother who's careless is not it?"

"Yes, he's cute and cold but he's pretty handsome" Ayu said.

"[What's so handsome you said Yu? Woiii it is no longer good-looking but it is handsome], yes it is," I replied flatly.

"And now you remember?"

"Yes, we're talking about him so I remember" Ayu and Daniza's questions made me less comfortable.

"That's the name of falling in love" asserted Daniza again.

[I'm in love] I murmured in my heart.

An accusation from my two unwarranted companions. I was only happy after that most beautiful 5-minute event. Walking in tandem with a stranger, the person I first met in the elevator, the person who saved me from Azmi's grip, the first person to applaud when I finished the song during the vocal selection, the vocalist, the shady-eyed man near her heart was beating faster than usual.

For that little incident, I could not hide the joy in my face. Then Ayu and Daniza immediately threw accusations that I was in love.

If this happiness is called falling in love, it is so easy for love to fall.

"I'm not in love," I said firmly. I stared hard at my two best friends, hoping they were sure of my words just now.

"Okay, you broke your heart" recriminated Daniza again. "How do you feel now, happy right?" Daniza held on to her opinion. I am in love with her, but I refuse to admit it.

"Yes, I'm happy, continue?"

"You remember him now? Shown when he helped you?"

"Yes," I answered listlessly, Ayu and Daniza interrogated incessantly.

"Yes, my heart's pounding?"

"Is there an uncomfortable feeling around your stomach? Hmmm ... sort of a mules but right?"

"Yes, there, Niz."

"Geez Za, you are***** what**** or peak or how the hell, you are in love, just haven't noticed yet. Argg .. I'm gleeful to know you don't want those innocent claws on your face." Daniza grumbling.

"I'm not in love, I'm just amazed, period."

"It's hard to talk to someone who's drunk as you are" Daniza started to get emotional.

"Already, already, let's go to the cafeteria. Forget about that." Take me to Ayu and Daniza to end the little riots that just happened.

[His intention was to share their happiness but instead ended the debate. If they knew, they would accuse me and draw the conclusions they wanted, I wouldn't tell the story. Taboo once, women fall in love.] I grumbled in my heart.

***

The canteen was rather quiet, the long rain made the school residents lazy to move.

I again chose a chair that was in the corner of the cafeteria, the most comfortable position to keep an eye on whoever came in. Ayu and Daniza ordered food. I ordered fried rice and warm tea.

I sat by myself waiting for Ayu and Daniza to take orders, laziness came over, I leaned my chin on my right hand, my mood was a mess since Ayu and Daniza accused me of falling in love.

My gaze was wild, searching for the existence of a helper angel, this little heart hoping that the rain would not make it lazy to the canteen. While this head was crowded with the words of Ayu and Daniza in the classroom earlier. The feeling of palpitations and discomfort in the stomach, I experienced it.

Am I in love? Is this what love feels like? Heart pounding uncharacteristic, happy matchless and mind crammed with him that can make us remember it only because it shows a small concern and after that it enters the heart and mind as it pleases. Those questions are running through my head.

Ayu and Daniza came to bring food. They then took a comfortable sitting position to enjoy a warm meal in the rain that began to subside.

"My order fried rice is tasteless?"

"Well, try," Daniza scooped the rice on my plate, she wanted to make sure it was bland or just my feelings.

"No, it feels the same as it did yesterday,"

"Or are you not lustful?" suspicious Ayu.

"Know, it's tasteless."

"Hmmm .. appetite decreases, this is when people fall in love again" Daniza started again.

"Geez, what does this have to do with trying Niz?"

"Za, if you fall in love again, the mood is messy, appetite goes up and down, the heart trembles, heart beats irregularly, remember it's just him and him, and one more, and one more, if it turns out you're finally jealous to see the upperclassman talking to another woman, then fix you're in love."

I was just trying to back up Daniza's statements but she was straight out again, "You don't have to comment or defend yourself right now, you think about it, and for a little night if you're alone and then remember that big brother and your feelings are suddenly happy, your heart is pounding, don't be shy to admit, you know, the feeling you call awe starts to level up so fall in love. You can tell us, don't be ashamed of Za because falling in love is everyone's right. Now you eat, because this fried rice is not at all bland. I'm not arguing, okay!" A straightforward, firm and clear sentence cornered me.

"Za, falling in love does sometimes make people whose hearts are soft, obedient, calm drastically turn into hard-hearted, stubborn and reject opinions," Ayu once advised me.

"Betul Za, this is nothing, you just feel good, the flowers in your heart are blooming, there are times when the flowers will wither and your days begin to darken. At a time like this you just need a friend to share, so please don't be stubborn."

I know that both of my friends care. [Maybe true, I fell in love but the taboo admits it.] whispered my heart softly.