Love Sholeha
Too heavy today

The last day Sholeha worked, the boisterous atmosphere of the guardians had received their children's reports. Sholeha is happier because the holiday has arrived, the various activities he has completed with the spirit of today. He also felt on school holidays, as an employee in the school environment. The gifts are equally shared, the children run around happily telling each other stories. Likewise, the mothers who accompanied their children were also happy while praising each other's learning outcomes.

Sholeha packed all small objects and arranged tables and chairs neatly. Although only two weeks will not be used, everything should be kept neat and clean. Sholeha compact with Irma finished her work when the day was near noon.

Eleven hours over five minutes. Sholeha leaned her head against the pole on the classroom porch. " Huh, tired yeah... God today" he sighed as he waited for Irma to lock the door.

"Do we eat first or go home?"sholeha asked, while following Irma's steps. Irma stopped, then looked at Sholeha.

" We stopped by the meatball stall aja yuk"

" Can." Sholeha smiled seeing Irma's far improved attitude change.

" We haven't been there for a long time" he replied enthusiastically.

They rushed towards the destination with a happy feeling. It has been more than a week since they have kept quiet, today Irma is showing a facial expression that Sholeha misses so much. Although the two hold each other's prejudices that can not be disclosed.

Sholeha doesn't care about anything else, most importantly she can't hate her best friend no matter the reason. Choosing an abandon is not a good thing, but this is a principle in friendship, he said.

With each drive, Irma has parked her motorbike first. The atmosphere of the meatball stall that the menu is not just meatballs is crowded with visitors. But he was packing home. They chose to sit by the window, a very wide glass window with no obstructions. So that the village street was clearly visible. Vehicles dominated by two wheels crowded the streets in half an hour like today.

Two bowls of meatballs have been served, from its perfectly round shape the more delicious soaked sauce that is still steaming. So with two cups of sweet iced tea that is so refreshing. Sholeha began to enjoy the meatballs without her noodles slowly. Occasionally he glanced at Irma who was still silent awkwardly as usual. Sholeha guessed all the contents in Irma's head.

What does he want, does he want to say something or is he going to ask her for something?

All the questions kept popping up as if from inside his bowl of meatballs.

"I'm there important" Irma said suddenly.

Even Sholeha was prepared to hear the continuation of his words. Sholeha stopped chewing, she focused her eyes on Irma.

"First, I'm sorry "Imma seemed to take a deeper breath.

" For what?"

" A lot of things Ha, I know this is too evil for me to admit"

" At least I know why"

" I've loved Mas Arman all along"

Deg ...

Sholeha was only speechless at what to do.

" I know Ir," Sholeha answered loudly.

" But we both realized it, "

" then?"

" Sorry...... "

" Since when?"

" I don't know for sure, Mas Arman always complained that you are too indifferent to him, too simple in relationships, you never follow what he wants and...

enough's enough!

Sholeha doesn't want to hear.

" And he feels like you never understand him" Irma said.

" He didn't tell me?" Sholeha held back her cries with all her might.

" What should be with words and phrases a way to wake you up?

He's waiting for you to change Ha."

Why was he still being blamed in such a betrayed position?

Why is Sholeha seemingly guilty of this bad past?

Irma was too blatant to call herself stupid and could not do anything at that time. Sholeha was silent permeating all the currents of regret and betrayal that were heading towards her heart simultaneously. He just wants to know why it's still up if the tip still hurts him.

Preparation for the reality he once thought about this, really happened. Even though he is no longer hurt at least do not have the heart to betray. This is not a necessity in life, but it is a principle in every human being.

" Is that so wrong with me?" ask Sholeha rahu.

" You didn't care much about Ha, Mas Arman just gave up on that."

" I'm that bad, huh?"

" I'm sorry Sholeha, we were wrong not to say it honestly from before.

Don't blame Mas Arman yes, he never hates you, nor does he blame you, sorry Sholeha, sorry"

Sholeha's hand was held tightly by Irma, in order to channel her earnestness and regret.

Sholeha lowered her head, then let go of her hand slowly.

" You also said I was wrong Ir, I was just confused as to what I meant in your hearts, even I felt so foreign among you a long time ago. I have to how, I am also an ordinary man who does not know many things in your hearts and minds, I .... "

Sholeha could no longer hold back her tears.

" I hope we can go through and forget this past, you who first stepped away Ha, I love Mas Arman very much, I want you to be able to accept all of this with a broad heart, you must also love Mas Sholeh now and beyond "

Irma said with tears flowing, oh god....

Women cry like this. Many meatball buyers there do not interfere with the focus of the two. Whether someone is listening or not they are just busy withholding their emotions and cries.

" I think it's useless if we hate each other. Forgiveness is not a difficult thing, but don't force me to forget all this Ir, I.... Also hurt this time, sorry this is too sick."

Sholeha rubbed her tears violently, she was about to leave Irma.

But he remembered the meat he had not paid, he approached the cashier first, he did not want to leave a debt because of heartbreak and betrayal.

The hot sun was burning his heart more and more, he knew if lingering listening to Irma speak would make him hurt more. If he could choose, Sholeha would not want to feel this mess of romance in his life. Even too bad to remember, well this is what he said was alive. Nothing is perfect as we wish.

With a feeling that sholeha slam towards the most comfortable space in her life, I don't know how long she'll lock up and seclude in there.

Tells the ants he was so ashamed of his love story. Don't let anyone ask again why he was crying, he can't tell back. Too sad, let it all flow wherever the end of the loss later, he will not care.

******

In accordance with Fatih's request at that time, finally after returning from for the report was already in circumcision. Yeah, that fast.

Everyone gathered in the central room of Rizal's residence, the nuclear family taking turns to look at Fatih and comfort him.

Brought various gifts and pocket money to him.

Fatih looks carefree to enjoy what is in nature. The fourth-grader got what he wanted this year. Not infrequently from some people tease him with adult-style jokes.

Sholeha was moved to see the courage of her favorite nephew, even she came to this house Fatih was finished in circumcision. Because only in circumcision, has not yet held a thanksgiving so the closest people who come to visit.

" Oh well granddaughter grandpa already bujang, ndak nangis right was Le?" Sulaiman praised Fatih who collapsed in front of the tv.

" No Kek, Fatih got a lot of gifts from Aunt Leha, he said if it was there" he laughed as he pointed to a bag of crackles lying on the chair.

Everyone laughed, looking at the innocence of Rizal's son who was very different from the look on his face that looked pale and tense. Sholeha smiled, even though she only bought school supplies and a few toys for Fatih, she overdone in hope.

From the face of Fatih Sholeha shifted to her brother, she deliberately nudged her hand that looks tense supporting her body when sitting down.

" Don't you, how tense is that?"

" Ndak Nduk, just a little bit of caution, Fatih kekeh really want in circumcision "he took a slow breath.

"No, don't overdo it ."

"It turns out Fatih is cool huh Mas" Sholeha smiled in praise .

Many brothers from Ayu also came to visit Fatih, Sholeha was a little busy helping Ayu give a banquet for the guests. Khitan is a big event for boys, it is only natural that they are made kings and are very spoiled.

Until the afternoon, Sholeha still faithfully helped Ayu in her small kitchen.

Counting while forgetting her sadness this afternoon. They told each other about Fatih's circumcision and plans after he recovered, maybe three more days.

" Ndak not need a very rame-rame is Mom, the most important thing is to gather all, read prayers and eat those foods only" Rizal told Bu Fatma.

" Later ndak keburuh kitchen renovation mother, Rizal much of this work, "he added.

" It's up to you, how good. The important thing is that Fatih's healed first"

They continued their small talk, accompanying the king who was busy playing games on his father's phone.

There seemed to be no sign of the slightest pain on his body, he looked very relaxed.

Seeing the greatness of Fatih with the sophistication of the tool of the present khitan makes Sulaiman again tell the story of Rizal inversely proportional to his son now. Told by his father, if Rizal used to cry endlessly after being circumcised first.

" Well his name is also old times sir, cut him using scissors, where there are those who use a machete also so horrified me" he seemed to defend himself.

everyone laughed, no exception Fatih .

" Halah emang now wear what, what replace use razor tool, right ndak also?" everyone's laughter sounded.

****

It did not feel like the day changed the night, after the magrib Sholeha came back with her mother to Rizal's house. Kasian, if Fatih is lonely, he just lies alone in front of the tv, he said earlier, while seducing Sholeha to take her.

This grandmother really loved him as sincerely, love for the first grandchild. Impressed so deep.

It had been half an hour since Sholeha's arrival with her mother.

Sholeha was accompanying Al to a meal at the dining table. Al is independent, he seems to understand if the brother is sick and must be accompanied by his mother. At least he doesn't whine.

His eyes did look at Al, but his mind drifted somewhere.

It seems that he drowned again in the past that wandered in his brain.

" dry, Ha.... Al wants a drink"

" Ha uh what Al," Sholeha was a little surprised.

" Drink Bi !"

"Eh yes for a moment" Sholeha poured water nearby.

Astagfirullah.

Intending to sit back, Sholeha paused when she heard the sound of greetings spoken from the front door. Ayu's voice was so loud that she answered the greeting, Sholeha undoed her intention to join in welcoming the guest.

He sat back down with Al, who seemed to have finished his meal.

" O Allah, Rahma, how are you?"

it was Ayu's voice heard, all the way to the kitchen.

The house is not so big, natural if it sounds to the back of the house though. Plus the voice of Ayu who sounded so happy and surprised.

After that Sholeha no longer heard what they were talking about in the living room.

Without saying goodbye Al left Sholeha alone in the kitchen. Rizal goes into the kitchen, asking Sholeha to make a drink for the guest.

"Who is Mas?"

" Buddy your brother" he answered briefly.

" Have you seen?"

" It's been good, ever since your mother was born Al-Kayaknya"

" Oh "

Rizal left Sholeha, not waiting long for the warm sweet tea with lemon slices to be finished.

The aroma will warm up the meeting of two friends kangen that, kangen,

Sholeha delivers to the living room,

when she looked at the face of the woman before her her smile just rubbed off on her. Very beautiful looks graceful and mature. The clothes are so neat and fragrant, giving the ideal impression in the eyes of Sholeha. Where did this woman come from, Jakarta, or abroad?

" In his tea mak !" sholeha

" Thank you, "a smile so simple.

Not wanting to disturb Sholeha leaving the two into the house.

This time he chose to sit down to join the mother and also Rizal in the living room.

I don't know why Sholeh is so eager to hear what they're going to talk about there.

" I went to see Grandma Yu, she's been sick lately" I heard by Sholeha, ah she became curious herself right.

" Shole know you're here again?" Ayu asked him.

Why is there a name Sholeh?

Oh yeah, Sholeha remembers it now.

They are little friends, maybe even school-age friends.

" I don't think I know yet"

he answered with a small laugh, which sounded melodious, according to Sholeha.

This is Sholeha why?

Since then he continues to praise her endlessly, is it very charming?.

Back heard he asked Ayu one thing, which was so clearly heard by Sholeha.

" Sholeh is getting married soon?"

his voice why is heard contains the element of sadness and sadness so, according to Sholeha.

" Do you know Rahma?" Ayu sounded a little surprised.

Sholeha grew curious, even she changed her sitting position to be more able to clearly listen.

Now Sholeha stole listen .

" I guess he's really waiting for me"

And yes, Sholeha felt sorry for being curious about the beautiful woman.

He really felt shrunk and dwarfed without seeing the opponent before him.

Instantly his chest tightened again but more than he could hear the story of betrayal this afternoon.

Why like this?

***