YOUR LOVE IS DISAPPEARING
Chapter 33

POV Rohman

Today the sun was so hot and stung my skin that was whiter because now I just lay there not spending energy and hot.

Eti my sister asked me to buy her a new motorcycle to go to college, actually glad I could make their lives luxurious, but on the other hand I also wanted to make myself happy.

Shortly after, Eti and I went home. Mbak Tuti is already at home with tears flowing endlessly, the woman who from childhood just kept with me and often defended me now looks chaotic and disheveled.

"Dec, Ma'am out of sheer drive," he said, as he twisted the edge of his shirt.

"Couldn't you? Mom, didn't you lock the door?" I asked my cousin some questions I was proud of, but now that pride has begun to erode because he was so willing to reject me when I needed help from him.

"Yes can. The door's in the bobble, look if you don't believe it!" Mbak Tuti raised his voice staring at me, his gaze made me pity.

Immediately I pocket the jeans I wear, there are a few pieces of twenty thousand pieces and then I give it to him, enough to prop up his stomach hungry at this time.

"It's not enough, man," Tuti's bead eyes glared at me.

"So how many, Ma'am?" I asked my mother's sister's son.

"One million was a pinjem. The promise of a week will change," said Tuti, his gaze turned to mama who was sitting on the sofa while eating snacks.

"There it is, Ma'am. But I need it too." I dropped my ass next to my mom who was chewing cassava chips.

"Seek!" Both hands of Mbak Tuti he held, I feel sorry for her, what all this time her husband was so indifferent to her that my cousin was left to ask his family.

Immediately I reached into my backpack and took out a few hundred thousand bills and counted them and gave them to Tuti. Smile expands on his sweet face, before long Tuti said goodbye to go home and asked Eti to drive him.

"Who was Tuti here, Ma?" I asked the woman who had given birth to me who was still faithful to chew her favorite cassava chips.

"At each other's neighbors" answered the flat mother. Looks like mom doesn't like me giving money to Mbak Tuti, seen from his face so sour.

"Kasian yes, Ma'am Tuti," I turned to look at my gawai who had been a few calls from mami.

"Ga kasian anyway. There will be her husband" said the mother ketus, because the mother really does not like me to give money to Mbak Tuti.

"Yes but what's wrong with that." I touched Mom's hand, trying to melt her mood. I slapped the back of the hand of the woman who had given birth to me, said goodbye and left home.

I went down the community plantation and rice fields, they were still in the rice fields and in the garden when the clock showed at four in the afternoon.

This afternoon you intend to rent my old first before I start routine activities. There is no intention of my heart making a fuss with Anita because I have slightly started mengikhlaskan himself to be with other men because I do not want if Anita feels tremendous pain when she found out in the end that I peddled this me, it would hurt more for her than my current pain.

Before long my motorcycle stopped right in front of my contract first, my mood again did not improve, given the circumstances and feelings that I had been through with Anita.

"Assalamualaik." I knocked on the door of Anita's rented house several times but it was quiet as uninhabited.

"Who's looking, Mas?" The house side neighbor who often accompanied Anita waved at me, don't ask her what her name is, I forgot.

"Find Anita. Is he still here?" I asked the woman who was much younger than Anita.

"Say she wants to stay with her cousin, Mas Rohman, who stayed here yesterday" she explained enthusiastically. I held onto my chest that was rumbling violently, how could Anita confess that her affair was my cousin.

My hatred became more and more towards the woman who said she was carrying my child, for a moment I sat on the rattan chair in front of this house, I let out a long sigh.

"Weak." I murmured softly, why should I judge the lies of the woman who never loved me at all.

My knees were shaking, I forced my way onto my bike, turned it on and left the rented yard full of sweet and bitter memories with my ex-wife.

The fog in my eyes I couldn't hold and I controlled, the clear droplets just kept falling. I hate this dirty and cunning me.

I was speeding up my bike even more, my heart was burning hot fire that Anita had ignited to make me suffer more and languish, what was my fault with her until she got that rest on me.

"Woi. Be careful!" The rider beside me who looked as fast as lightning passed shouted at me.

Samar saw a big truck from the left. Yesterday I was always careful if going through this area because it often crosses heavy equipment that comes in and out, I don't know what whisper of wind I drove my motor matic so fast that I hit the sand truck from the side.

My body was slammed a few meters, my body was bent over the asphalt, my eyes were glimpsed with misty eyes, looking at the flowing red liquid, perhaps from my body, and one leg was beside the blood. Samar I heard a woman yelling and asking for help, shortly after I couldn't see anything.

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I don't know how long I've been unconscious, what I know now is that the wall clock is ten o'clock at night. I touched my head that felt so heavy, my body ached and my legs felt numb.

"Ma, Bang Rohman is conscious." A woman screamed, I knew it was the voice of my sister Eti, it turned out that she cared about me and took care of me in the hospital, I can assure you it's a hospital because of the white feel and the infusion that stuck in my right hand.

The middle-aged woman who had given birth to me approached me while commenting on the bitter smile, as well as Eti who held back her tears.

"Bang!" Eti immediately rushed over and hugged me, my sweet black sister like a possessed person.

"Don't cry. Your brother's alive." I chuckled at the sight of these two women who were this much different age so caring for me right now.

Before long a doctor entered the room where I was lying, the woman who gave birth to me shifted to make room for the doctor to examine me, as well as Eti who immediately sat on a small stool next to the nightstand.

The doctor deftly checked my heartbeat, lightened my eyeballs and ended up wiping the blanket I was wearing on my legs.

"The blood has stopped. It's good that you rest a lot and do not move a lot for a while, let the recovery process be faster," he said with a serious face. I gulped down Saliva.

"Something is wrong, Doctor? I feel fine." Because I just feel like my body is breaking down. Still I remember I smashed my bike in the collar of a big sand truck that stopped.

Instantly I remembered the blood and legs that were separated from the body when my eyes were almost closed in the accident.

"What ...." My throat was choked, my chest tightened.

"sorry. We couldn't put together what had been separated from the body after a few hours" the doctor said, causing me to get up and sit down, but the doctor prevented my actions.

"Pass your body Mr. Rohman. You can still breathe the air right now, it's a sign that God still loves you" the doctor said and immediately left me holding tightness in the chest.

I looked at Eti as well the woman who gave birth to me was crying bitterly.

"I'm sorry Rohman, Ma." As much as I can hold back tears so that the woman who gave birth to me will no longer resist.

"Don't apologize. Whatever my child's circumstances, I still love my children" said the woman who had given birth to me as she wiped the corner of her eye.

Again my heart was like a rock, my mind floated in memory of Ali. Now I realize how much Mayang loves my son whom I have wasted.