Because I Don't Want to Lose
33 - Honest

Anaya was never afraid to face someone's anger. Once with Ridwan, where would he give up. He will continue to retaliate until his own emotions peak and finally he is silent away. However, it was different when he received Izzar's angry expression this time. The loud tone of his voice instantly tore through his mind, inflicting disorderly wounds and turmoil.but, instead of turning angry, he wanted to cry.

Elevator door opens. Anaya stepped into it followed by Izzar. Placed his room key card which also serves as an elevator access, before pressing the floor number. Only the two of them were inside that narrow half-walled mirror-like space.

Izzar stood behind Anaya, less than half a meter away. He could listen to Anaya's half-hunting breath signifying the unstable emotions within him. They were so close, but they looked like people didn't know each other.

In my heart, Izzar regretted speaking out loudly to Anaya. He looked at Anaya's head. Her usual long hair is draped, coiled original with rubber hair, to present a clean white neck and shoulders that are tempting to touch.

Izzar averted his gaze, trying to restrain himself. He took a breath to refocus himself on his annoyance at Anaya's attitude.

Anaya's room is located at the end of the corridor. He opened the door, turned on the light, put down his bag, and stood by the window with his hands crossed over his chest. For some reason, he felt the actual space was quite spacious, feeling claustrophobic with the presence of Izzar.

"What are you talking about?" anaya asked in a cold voice. He tried to re-establish his supremacy .

Izzar sat on the edge of the bed, watching Anaya who chose to stand straight and stiff, even though there was a chair not far from him.

"Why stand?"

"Neverything!" answer Anaya.

"So he said tired. Why not sit?" Izzar asserted out of pity at seeing the tense Anaya.

Izzar's question really sucks for Anaya.

"You also said tired of me, why not just say what?" Anaya's emotions started to mix.

"okay! Why was it, after we were so familiar again when following the game, you suddenly did not see clearly anymore?" Izzar lures Anaya though he already has a definite guess as to what causes Anaya to be hostile again.

Anaya lowered her gaze. He thought hard to find the right reason.

"From the beginning we agreed, I've asked you so that we can be good friends. Don't consider me an enemy. But, sometimes you are hard to guess what he wants. A moment good, a second later angry. What's wrong?"

Anaya comes to terms with the agreement that binds him and Izzar. Sometimes he forgets the contract. He could not explain Izzar's mistake. Because, it is not the fault of Izzar if he likes or likes other women. It's not his fault if his ex-fiance wants him back.

Anaya felt ashamed of Sasika for a moment. The woman was once close to Izzar because from the beginning they did love each other. Meanwhile, Izzar was close to himself because he was forced, or rather forced. If Izzar had been kind and considerate of himself, of course because his personal character was so, as recognized by those around him.

His own fault cannot be professional with the commitment he makes. It was he who foolishly allowed himself to be swept away with the feeling that Izzar was his.

"Annaya?" Izzar.

Anaya's head was raised. He looked at Izzar whose eyes were also on him, with a firm but shady look that melted his soul.

"Why do you think your attitude changes every time I meet Sasika?" Izzar clarified his question.

"Neverything" replied Anaya slowly.

"Don't say nothing, Anaya!" Izzar can't believe it. "If there's nothing, why do you look upset and leave me at the villa?"

"Because I'm sorry you lied!"

"I lied to you what? I didn't know Sasika was coming to Randi's wedding. I think you should know better, because the invitation is limited, and Randi might not invite him!"

Anaya's lips folded tightly.

"Or, you're still upset about the lie I met Sasika at the coffee shop? that was a long time ago?"

Anaya's face fell back.

Izzar waited for Anaya to respond to the question and his long description. But Anaya lost her tongue.

"Honestly, Anaya... After some time we stayed together, I started to like you. But, if you go back and forth without being clear every Sasika appeared, for a long time I was tired of facing you! ... If you're jealous, say! Don't act like a child! Lose Naira!" " Izzar's tone of voice rose. He was annoyed because Anaya just kept quiet from now on.

Beyond a doubt, hearing the expression of what Izzar is, Anaya even became furious.

"If you're tired of facing me, you've, just go there!" Anaya screamed, ran to the bathroom and locked her up.

Izzar was shocked and astonished by Anaya's reaction. How difficult it is to break down this woman's pride. Izzar really wanted to leave Anaya as he requested. However, he remembered his agreement with Mr. Arsyad which required him to win the heart of his former daughter-in-law. And, he knows he won't be able to get away from Anaya either.

In the bathroom, Anaya rested her hands on the sink. It takes time and space to digest all Izzar's words. Although his heart flowered knowing Izzar liked him, there was also a sense of annoyance because Izzar seemed to give up on him, and he did not accept compared to Naira. However, what really bothers him is Izzar's demands to confess his feelings. He was jealous of Sasha.

Anaya looked at her reflection in the mirror. Randi's words in the villa ringed in his ears.

“This is how Anaya I know. It's hard to express her own feelings. Choose silence or even talk contrary.”

Yes, Randi knows Anaya very well. He never misjudges people. And, he was right about Izzar. His best friend was a good man. Anaya would definitely be considered a fool if she left him.

After washing her face and drying it, Anaya braced her heart out and faced the man who had made her heart need it.

Izzar has moved. He no longer sat on the edge of the bed, but stood leaning against the wall by the door. Like preparing to leave.

"Where are you going?" Anaya's anxious.

"You told me to leave, didn't you? I'm just waiting for you to make a farewell."

Anaya bit her lip. Izzar turned his body and stepped to the door.

Anaya choked, her lips trembling and her body cooling down. He is unable to speak. Only her tears could not be prevented from flowing down her cheeks. His misty gaze looked at the back of Izzar who was away from him.

Izzar hoped Anaya would yell out to him. However, until his hand held the door handle, there was no sound from the woman. Izzar also looked. And he was surprised to see the pilunya Anaya who was crying in silence. Izzar mistakenly thought. Presumably, his tactic of pretending to leave Anaya will result in an expressive reaction that asks him not to go and has a confession about his heart.

Anaya is a different woman. Izzar forgets Anaya once failed with her marriage, and she's a strong woman who won't beg a man to stay beside her, even though her soul is fragile.

Izzar. In a few steps, Anaya's body was taken.

"Just go, nothing, really." Anaya's voice faltered between her cries.

Izzar tightened his embrace. He buried Anaya's head in his chest until the stuffing stopped.  After Anaya felt calm, Izzar loosened his embrace. Anaya.

"Related, do you want me to go?" Izzar gently rubbed Anaya's wet cheeks.

Anaya. His heart wants to say a lot of things. But, his tongue is a mute.

"But, promise not to lash out again because of Sasika!" Izzar looked seriously.

"Yes. But the promise also will not lie again and the same kind of him," Anaya replied.

Izzar smile. Of course he wouldn't do it.

Then, slowly kissed her charming lips before him, softly. Anaya is not evasive. He closed his eyes permeating the charm and sensation he received. Even when Izzar then put it on the bed and caressed his neck and shoulders that had been tempting before. The two dissolve to unite the desire that has been blocked.

...***...