Because I Don't Want to Lose
7 - Visit of the Father

Moving home temporarily even though only carrying important items, it is still tiring Anaya. Especially with limited space in the house Izzar, he must be smart to arrange everything so as not to add narrow. His own fault was handing over a temporary house search to Izzar.

When the work was finally completed even though it did not match her expectations, Anaya threw her body on the mattress. He hoped that the renovation of his house would be completed quickly so that he could return to his residence.

Just five minutes after Anaya lay down, Mba Kemi told Ridwan to come to pick up Naira. Anaya almost forgets that today is Sunday, Ridwan's Naira's parenting schedule.

Naira pointed out that she was reluctant to go with Ridwan. The little boy frankly preferred to be with Izzar.

"Papa no fun, Ma. Not good to go on a trip with papa. I'd rather play with Dad Izzar.” Naira whispers in Anaya's ear, which makes Anaya restless, worried that Ridwan will accuse her of inciting Naira if he hears of this.

It took Anaya fifteen minutes to persuade and advise Naira to keep respecting Ridwan as her biological father. When Naira finally wanted to leave with Mba Kemi, Anaya breathed a sigh of relief.

He had just packed up to meet Sandra, because he did not want to be alone with Izzar at home, when the door was knocked followed by a shout of greeting with a voice like he had heard.

“Eh, Mom! Why didn't you say you wanted to come here? Up what?” izzar was surprised to find his mother at the door.

“Surprise! … Mama took the taxi. Where are Anaya and Naira?”

Anaya gasped at the sound of the conversation from her room. He did not expect to get a sudden visit of Mama Izzar aka his father-in-law. Anaya had to leave the room to greet him.

The middle-aged woman looked happy to see Anaya, and was a little disappointed that Naira was not home.

“You've had breakfast?” mama Izzar asked while taking out the food boxes from the grocery bag she was carrying.

Anaya helped. He was surprised to see how much food was brought. There is rendang, mustofa potatoes, heart fried sambal, pecal seasoning, salted eggs, fried cashews, and strawberry cheese cake.

“This is all mommy made by herself. All Izzar's favorite. Mama doesn't know your favorite and Naira's yet. If you already know, later mama will come here again mama bring,” mama Izzar told Anaya.

“Why did Mama bother?” Izzar opened a container containing cashews and grazed them with a few grains.

“Who is bothered?” Mama Izzar dodged. He sat down on the dining table chair while arranging his luggage. “You know mom loves to cook and baking.”

Anaya offers to make a drink. Izzar whispered that his mother also likes chamomile tea. Anaya immediately prepared it with her own sense of wonder in her heart, why did mama Izzar also love the same type of tea with her.

As soon as he smelled the aroma of the tea Anaya brewed, mama Izzar screeched. He was happy to know his daughter-in-law liked the same thing.

“Izzar also love that tea!” exciting mama Izzar.

Anaya stared in disbelief at Izzar who was sitting across from her mother. The man smiled broadly at Anaya's gaze. The information conveyed by Mama Izzar made Anaya feel cornered because he had never offered Izzar tea when he made it every morning. And now, he would not want to serve it also for Izzar.

Mama Izzar is a very friendly and chatty type of woman. It was obvious that he was trying to get to know Anaya through his conversation. Anaya was initially hesitant and reluctant, but the warmth of her in-laws' attitude made her heart melt as well. Although, he was still upset with Izzar because he could not prevent himself from being trapped in this awkward condition.

From their conversation, Anaya became more familiar with Izzar's background. He was the first of two children. Her sister lives in Australia with her husband. Just like Anaya, her father died while she was in college. So that he quickly became independent and responsible for his mother and sister.

Anaya can see how Izzar has great respect for his mother. And his mother appreciated his son. Anaya remembers her own mother who died a year after she married Ridwan. His mother was as happy as Izzar's mother.

“If you have free time, you play at home yes same Naira!” pinta mama Izzar while kissing Anaya's cheek.

Anaya just smiled.

After Izzar's mother came home, Anaya's face turned sour to Izzar. He was annoyed because the plan to meet Sandra so failed due to the sudden visit of Mama Izzar. He is also upset, because in agreement, receiving a visit in-laws is not a mandatory thing to do.

“OK! I'm sorry my mama didn't come to say anything.” Izzar responded to Anaya's uneg-uneg. He felt so wrong. Because before there was Anaya, his mother was used to come at any time.

Still grumbling, Anaya leaves the house in her car. He did not say where to go to Izzar. And, Izzar was also reluctant to question his goals. He did not respond to Anaya's emotions. After Anaya's departure, he prefers to concern himself with drawing restaurant designs for his friend Randi's project.

Anaya goes to Sandra's apartment, and pours out her feelings about ‘marriage’ her. Sandra tried to sympathize listening to Anaya's complaints, although in her heart she wanted to laugh also aware of Anaya's stiffness and harsh attitude.

“I'm as bad as Izzar! There was just his behavior that made me annoyed” Anaya grumbled.

“Patience, Nay! Consider it a risk that you must bear.” Sandra tried to make Anaya sincere with the situation she had to live.

“A year seems like a long time ago. I'm not sure I'd be strong staying at home with people I don't like.” Anaya covered her face with a sofa pillow.

“You think again of your goal of forcing Izzar to marry you. For Naira, right?” Sandra reminded. “You don't need to like Izzar, Nay. You just accept his presence. Try to make him like a friend,” persuade Sandra.

Anaya so remembered Izzar's request at Puncak the other day.

“Lagian, don't hate Nay too much, fear it will be hit by a plague, it could even be really love,” led Sandra.

Anaya's eyes glared and threw her pillow at Sandra. Sandra chuckles.

The two continued the conversation until late at night. Izzar did not contact her at all, nor did Mba Kemi. Anaya returned home almost midnight.

Anaya finds Naira asleep on the sofabed in Izzar's study. Picture books and color tweezers were strewn nearby. Izzar also slept in his chair.

There was a sense of sadness and a hint of guilt that surfaced in Anaya's mind to see the scene of both. But immediately pushed aside so as not to make him crybaby.

Slowly he tried to grab Naira's body. However, the position of the child who was too attached to the wall somewhat complicated him. Despite trying as quietly as possible, his movements still cause a sound of friction that wakes Izzar.

“Let me alone!” Izzar got up from his chair. He took Naira and then moved her to Anaya's room.

Anaya had toys, books and writing tools for Naira. He was stunned to see the results of Naira's image on the open page. The little girl drew a daughter flanked by her father and mother, with the words: mama, Naira, Izzar's father. In the corner of the paper, he drew another man of a smaller size, with the inscription : papa.

Anaya is stunned to see how much Izzar's presence in her son's heart means to put his biological father in the corner of the yard. And that makes him anxious, because there will come a time when he and Izzar will separate.

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