Cry, Or Better Yet Beg
chapter 14. Wants the Woman

Before him, Leyla trembled helplessly.

Although he often pretended to be brave, he was always easily frightened.

He's been like that since he was a kid.

Matthias started walking towards Leyla while recalling his memories of the young girl. He paused a few steps from Leyla as his eyes slowly turned to his hands. To be exact, on the glasses he held in his hand.

"I'm sorry."

Leyla barely opened her lips. His eyes were filled with anger, but his apology was polite.

“I didn't think you'd be here. I'm so sorry...”.

“What if I don't have it? Do you think it's okay to sneak in?”

Matthias tilted his head to look at Leyla. Every time he blinked, his eyes grew red. Even though she looked like she was about to cry, her eyes still remained calm.

“Like... thief?”

Matthias sneered in his low voice. Leyla's reddened cheeks were clearly visible even in the darkness.

“I just want to get back what is rightfully mine.”

"Ah. This is?"

Leyla's cheeks turned red as she lifted her glasses. When Matthias took a closer look at Leyla's face, her ears even started to turn red.

"Yes." Yeah."

The answer to his questions does not cause fear.

“My address you've hidden.”

Even though you tremble that much.

Matthias headed to the window with his glasses still in his hands. It was the same window where he threw his hat.

“T... No!”

Leyla, who was staring blankly, turned pale as she ran after him.

"returned it! Please!"

The lace scarf covering Leyla's shoulder fell to the floor. Leyla hurriedly raised her hand to cover the deep v-neck intersecting pajamas.

“Isn't it funny that you're concerned about your nightgown when you've seen my whole body thoroughly?”

Matthias now mocked Leyla. His red hue had been flushed to the nape of his neck.

"….. That's. It was inevitable!”

The frightened Leyla shook her head.

“That's not what I want, so I don't have choi...”.

“Do you think I want it?”

"What's? Oh forgive me. I didn't mean it that way.”

Leyla hurriedly took the scarf and covered her shoulders and chest. His half-fainted expression was quite cute until Matthias chuckled softly.

“Why are you suddenly acting like a woman? You said you're not a woman.”

“….. Whatever I am, Duke is still a real man.”

His refusal to lose from his words was provocative but still respectful. Matthias chuckled once more.

"By good."

As his laughter stopped, Matthias' voice grew slower.

“I don't know, Leyla. Maybe I'm not a real man.”

"Oh no!"

Leyla immediately shouted while tightly tying the tip of her scarf.

“Duke is a real man!”

"really?"

"Yes! You are the best man in Berg Empire!”

“Your assessment is quite generous.”

“That's what everyone who knows you thinks.”

“Isn't your thinking different?”

"…… NO."

Yep!

Although he wanted to agree to it, he held back his true thoughts by shaking his head vigorously.

"Impossible."

Leyla decided to sell her soul for her glasses tonight.

“So, Your Majesty, please return it.”

She was so upset that her tears almost fell but Leyla pleaded again.

“This is very important and valuable to me.”

He lowered his head and suffered humiliation.

Leyla felt she could kick all the rocks in the forest to release her pent-up anger, but Leyla knew how aggrieved she was right now.

If he was determined, the duke could have pushed him into a thief. He could have thrown his glasses into the river behind the window. All the simple actions for her were fatal to Leyla.

So he has to hold on.

Matthias approached the determined Leyla. As he threw his glasses up and down again, the distance between the two narrowed. They are now at a close enough distance to feel each other's body temperature.

Leyla looked up in shock. Matthias' eyes looked down on him deeply and calmly. It was like a bottomless river. It was the great, cold river that drowned him that hot afternoon, where all these misfortunes began.

Leyla was deep in thought when suddenly, her blurred vision suddenly became clear. Leyla slowly realizes that Matthias has been wearing glasses for her. His hands that covered his cheeks felt soft and hot like sun-warmed sand.

His face was very clear, yet everything around him looked turbid.

The flustered Leyla tried to avoid the look in her eyes but Matthias caught her attention by putting a little strength in her hand.

Why would…..

He wanted to ask, but the strange and frightening sensation overwhelmed Leyla. That was when Matthias' finger began to caress his lips.

His relaxed fingertips stopped between the slits of his lips.******* his frustration tickled Leyla's forehead. His breath also felt soft and hot, like the touch of his fingers.

Looking straight into Leyla's eyes, Matthias stroked the wet and soft skin that was inside her lower lip. The tip of his finger moved in and out of his mouth, until the tip of his nail almost touched his lower teeth. Leyla, who had long forgotten to escape, innocently held back her gaze and touch.

Matthias slowly closed his eyes as Leyla almost cried over her strange and incomprehensible actions. The hand that grasped his cheek gently gained strength but was then released.

Leyla staggered backwards as her hand finally let go of her face. He was now able to breathe well after straining on his grip.

Leyla's body trembled cautiously as she gasped for breath. Meanwhile, Matthias had already opened his blue eyes. Those clear blue eyes were what had humiliated and frightened Leyla.

Duke Herhardt, who had long been staring at Leyla, commanded calmly.

"Continue."

Leyla could not remember what happened after she left the pavilion.

He said goodbye, turned around, and left. But all those memories are vague. Leyla realized that she was already standing at the end of the forest path when she heard the screams of grass insects, felt the cool breeze, and saw her own shadow walking in the moonlight.

Leyla took the water from the pump located in the corner of the courtyard and washed her lips. He unconsciously rubbed and rubbed his lips until they were swollen and red. Although he felt his skin would peel off, the water still failed to dissipate his strange feeling.

Leyla's face, her scarf, and the front of her nightgown were drenched in cold water by the time she quietly returned to her room. Without thinking of drying it out, Leyla sat on the edge of her bed.

He had no idea what was happening, but Leyla was sure of one thing.

He doesn't want to see her again.

The canary sitting quietly in its cage flew towards Matthias just by snapping his finger.

Matthias extended his hand towards the bird while lethargicly leaning against the window frame. The canary naturally sat on his finger. Its truncated wings had grown long enough that it could fly further. His wings needed to be cut again, but he did not feel the need to cut them as short as before.

Matthias looked down at the window while listening to the canary song. The gardener, Bill Remmer, was working on his job. Leyla Lewellin, who had helped her from time to time, was nowhere to be seen for several days. He left day after night he went looking for his glasses. Leyla desperately began to avoid him.

Matthias wore a dark red hunting jacket after returning the canary to his cage.

He wants it.1

Matthias now clearly knew what emotion was.

That woman, Leyla. He wanted.

There is no reason to deny that fact anymore. Leyla Lewellin grew up to be a beautiful woman. Pretty enough to lure a man. But Matthias knows. Desire like this will surely disappear soon.

Should I leave a stain on my life just to satisfy that desire?

That night, with Leyla in front of him, Matthias thought and thought again. And he concluded.

NO. NOPE.

Leyla Lewellin was not worth her hardships and her desire for the woman was within her control.

Then why.

He let Leyla go that night. But if he acts like this after he sets him free, then he has no choice.5

“I've prepared your hunting session, mr.”

Hessen quietly approached. Nodding, Matthias took the gun Hessen had given him and left the bedroom.

“Did something happen?”

Kyle anxiously asked Leyla. Leyla, who was sticking the dried flower pedal into her notebook, calmly looked up and faced her.

"NO."

Leyla's voice unhesitatingly sounded bright as usual.

“Do I look like that?”

Leyla lowered her voice and whispered while wrinkling her eyes. Kyle somehow felt a burning sensation on his neck when he saw his expression.

“You've been stuck in the cabin lately. It's weird."

Kyle calmly shrugged his shoulders.

Leyla blinked blankly a few times and immediately regained her bright face. Her lips left a thin smile as her eyes sparkled brilliantly.

“Now that you find your glasses, you should travel more often. But it seems like you are doing the opposite now.”

Kyle looked at Leyla while putting his chin in her hand. He gently smiled and began to carefully write down the place and features of the flower petals he found in his notebook.

Leyla usually drew and pasted foreign flower petals onto her notebook and took them to the library to search for their names. Kyle always comes with her to see Leyla smile when he finds out the name of the flower petals. Leyla was a little boy who wanted to know the names of all the birds and flowers in the world. Kyle likes his geeky side.4

Leyla carefully closed the notebook after pressing it slowly with a piece of suction paper to prevent the ink from fading. The returned glasses glittered on his little face.

“You want to take a walk? To the tree you like, which stands in front of the river.”

"NO."

Leyla answered briefly as soon as Kyle finished his sentence.

“Didn't you always go there? Wh why? Did you see something scary in the woods again?”

"It's not like that. Besides I can't go to the forest today.”

"Why? Ah, is today the duke's hunting day?”

Leyla nodded after pushing the note to the end of the table. Not long after, there was the sound of a horseshoe from a distance.

"Wow. That's amazing.”

Kyle quickly ran to the front of the window and admired him. Duke Herhardt and his group were about to enter the forest through a path beside the cabin. The hunting dog led the way, followed by five young men riding horses.

Leyla glanced out the window with Kyle. Today the Duke is riding a shiny horse with dark brown fur. The red jacket and the shiny rifle caught his attention.

“But of course, Leyla. I am not hunting. I will not hunt in my lifetime.”4

Kyle suddenly changed his expression after admiring the duke. At that moment, Duke Herhadt turned his head towards the hut. Although Leyla was already hiding behind the curtains, she was shocked and retreated from the window.

For the past ten days, Leyla tried her hardest to avoid it. He did not approach the river and did not even take a walk into the forest. She feels regret towards Uncle Bill because he recently went to manage the park alone. He only helped when the duke came out of the estate and when he returned, he immediately left the garden.

He plans to endure his uncomfortable actions until the end of this summer. When autumn comes, Matthias gets engaged and leaves for the capital. Then, Arvis will feel at peace again.

“Do you feel unwell? Do you want to come to my house?”

Kyle anxiously asked while looking at Leyla's pale complexion.

“No, Kyle. I'm fine."

Leyla shook her head and sat back down on her chair facing the dining table.

“Again, this will end at night.”

As he opened his book haphazardly, gunshots rang out. Followed by the barking of the dog and the running of the horse.

With her hands clenched, Leyla turned the pages of her book that she could not read properly.

He thought he had no choice but to go to the forest tonight. There are a lot of poor birds to bury.