Help Me Get Divorced
Rationed twenty thousand

“Bang Dervish, wake up!” I shake my husband's leg. Woke him.

But he did not wake up. Just squirming. Really bummer. I shook his leg again.

“Bang, ask for money. Rice depleted. Cooking oil is also gone. Adel hungry want to ask for breakfast, which shopping money,”, I explained again.

But Bang Darwis remained ignorant. I'm sure he heard my babble, just lazy to serve.

Superfluity. This is what needs to eat, not just me, but our son. Adel needs to eat.

“Bang, wake up, it's noon!”

“Argh! You're fuckin', anyway? I'm still sleepy!”

I was shocked to fall. Bang Darwis woke up kicking. I who do not know, certainly avoid. Apes even hit the table until the glass fell and the shard hit the leg.

"Bang!" my jaws spontaneously crouched. Oh, God is sick. Blood flowing. Heel twitching.

Kutatap Bang Darwis fierce.

"What's? Wrong itself is not careful," he said.

Crazy, he was, instead of helping even clucked and went to the bathroom. I have no empathy. Wicked!

It's like this I can only grimace in silence while cleaning up the shards of the shard. Her secret.

“Buk?”

I turned my head spontaneously glaring as Adel approached.

“Don't come here!” stop me half screaming.

As if he understood, the little boy did not move. He's dead in the doorway. I was a little relieved because he complied. Danger if he approaches and shards of shard hit his feet.

“But, mother's feet there is blood,” adel oceh.

“What's wrong, mom's okay. Watching tv, yes. Don't come in here. Danger. Mom clean the shard first.”

Adel seemed to understand. He left the room.

After Adel died somehow my heart pain. Tears down cannot be held back. This heart is very painful because of Bang Darwis. We've been married for five years but my husband is still a bitch. What's even more painful now is starting to stingy. Shopping money is rationed daily and that is only twenty thousand.

Imagine, twenty thousand a day. Where enough.

Only, I can't make sense either. He has worked hard for us. Not enough is enough to be enough.

Bang Darwis returned to the room with a half-wet body and a towel wrapped around his waist.

"Don't crybaby. That's how crying," she sneered at me who was cleaning glass flakes.

The problem is not grim with the wound. It's more of a disappointment. I don't know what I feel, now he's starting to change. Never smile, rarely play with children.

Even if there is free time he is always engrossed in HP. And if I talk to him, the sentence he uttered must be about complaint. Dirty floor or clothes that have not been washed.

Though I was already a little, but in his eyes he was always less clean. Less neat.

He was not gini. Before marriage he promised this and that. I will be happy, he said. He even told me to quit my job so he could take care of him and our son. After that, I did it like this.

I'm not saying he's taking responsibility. No! 

He remains responsible. I am blessed, given food and shelter. But life is not just about that. Sometimes I also want to buy new clothes, roads, and others. But what power is always not delivered. I was pressured to be frugal. For five years married a single strand of gamis never bought.

Remembered by the past. When I was a girl, I was happy to buy anything. My salary is not much because it is just a high school graduation. Work is also in printing.

But I am happy. With such a salary I can love my parents and buy what I want. The way to where you can.

Once she was his wife, everything was limited. The longer life gets more miserable. I rarely go home because he says there is no fare. So, you can only miss the same parents from HP only. This was inversely proportional to what he had promised first.

Argha! The more I think the worse I get. The more they can't stand it. Divorce is fine, but not possible. We already have a child. And he is also my own choice. I used to be betrothed to the son of a friend of the mother who is a PNS, but I strongly oppose because of the love of Bang Darwis.

The more I thought I was getting upset. Feeling wrong about husband. To the extent that when there is a problem do not dare to talk to parents and siblings. I'm all self-serving.

"Ni the money," continued Bang Darwis while putting twenty thousand money on the table.

Slashed my heart. That money is enough to buy vegetables and eggs. The only problem is that there are some spices that run out. Not to mention cooking oil, coffee, sugar, bath soap.

Oh my God, to be angry feels the same, but ..

"Not enough, Bang. Add it again." I'm standing.

"Not enough? Never cook well too," Bang Darwis replied half-stomping.

Yes how to cook good. It's just that. If you are given fifty you may still be able to eat chicken.

"The problem is the same oil as onions, sugar, coffee, soap." I call one-on-one 

"Gudang used to be the same Aldi," he replied that made me run out of words.

"Yesterday was also in debt, Bang."

"Yes in debt again. I'll pay you later."

"But the payday brother was just a week ago."

Bang Darwis looks very windy. He came forward and flanked my chin. I was stuck without being able to dodge. Perih, pain, pain.

Besides, I'm scared too. His eyes glared big while patrolling. If he gets angry it is scary.

"Bang, pain …."

"Dare to treat your husband, ha!"

And again, all I can do is just quietly grimace in pain.

Apitan Bang Darwis release. He seemed to rush to put on his clothes.

"So the wife should be upset. Don't be too much of a nudet," he continued.

Yeah, and for five years this one time I've never sued him for it. Less what am I?

I saw him put on a jacket and put on some perfume.

"Where's Dervish going?"

He looked at her with a sharp look. "Not to kepo. What I expected at home. Have a wife can not want a husband, want to sleep a long time just disturbed. You know it's Sunday. I'm gonna take a break!"

Actually I know, I just have to shop and the money is always in her wallet. The wallet is always hidden.

"It's not enough to use that money" he said.

I saw the twenty thousand in hand with a grimacing heart in pain. A day is so rationed even though the husband's salary is good. It's over three million. As the largest company's food product salesman, my husband can already be called a senior.

"Bang, add more."

"There is no Nabila. There is no money. The one I only make gasoline is the same as cigarettes. Ordering to the store if there is no gasoline. I just gave you mom too. Never mind, say Aldi kasbon first I will pay. He's my brother, after all. He's gotta be willing to owe me."

Yes, Aldi does want to send a shot. I'm just not good. I know that my husband never paid while Aldi also needed to rotate the stall business capital. 

How can I know, yes because Aldi always smiles when I ask if Bang Darwis has paid what debt has not. That smile means I haven't paid my debt yet.

I went to bring money to do some shopping. On foot. Coincidentally, the location of Aldi stalls is not far away. Just passed five houses.

As usual, I shopped last. Deliberately waiting for a lonely stall because of embarrassment if anyone hears me owe. And also I don't want to because I owe, other neighbors follow the debt.

"Buy what, brother?" ask Aldi. The beautiful bujang smiled.

"Sir Nabila?"

I jerked.

"That's, Al, I'd like to buy eggs, oil, sugar, coffee, bath soap, onions. But …." I paused. Can't say anymore. I don't want to owe you, but ….

"Just a minute, brother."

Aldi goes in and out, bring the bag of crackle that I suspect the item mentioned earlier.

"This, Brother. Is there any more?"

I'm shaking.

This is what I can do other than take over the bag of groceries, then look at Aldi. My sister-in-law always smiled even though I came to pay.

Oiya, his face is different thin with Bang Darwis, the difference is Aldi taper. His body is also thin. Not like Bang Darwis.

"The lack will be paid Bang Darwis," I explained.

O Allah, throbbing my heart and face because of Bang Dervish. The shame is immeasurable.

"Yes. It's okay" Aldi replied. And he's still smiling. Looks shady look in his eyes.

"Thank you, yeah, Al." I smiled back at Aldi, then turned around to leave. But, called again. Of course I'm back in the body.

"Why, Al?"

"This is for Adel" he said, handing over the two-pack ice cream and putting it in a grocery bag.

"But, Al."

"One for Adel, one for Brother."

God, I don't know what to call. Screech up. I haven't had ice cream in a long time. I was the girl I used to get the most ice cream. But since marriage always berahan themselves let not jajan. I can shop for other necessities.

"Thank you, Al."

Aldi smiled and then looked down. I know where his eyes are going so bad. Guess what he'll do.

"I'm back, El." I hurriedly turned around.

"Stay, Brother."

Tuh.

I want to go back and see Aldi inside. He came out carrying something, then crouched down in front of me while putting the wound plaster on the leg.

"Because of the shard earlier," I explained without him asking.

"Be careful, Brother. Kasian Adel's. Later who invited him to play here if Kak Nabila's leg was injured."

"I-iya, thanks. " I grinned and left.

While I was thinking, why Aldi was still alone when his age was ripe. He also counts money. He had a small business that I know he started on his own. He worked as a TKI five years, then went home to make stalls.

As a criteria for her husband is perfect. The parents also seem polite. He paid for both his parents. It signifies that he is loving and devoted. So why not get married?

I was in the yard and saw that Bang Darwis's meticulous motorbike was still parked. I asked him to take care of Adel for a while because I had to shop. Fortunately he wanted to.

"Assalamu'alaikum."

"Waalaikumsalam" said Bang Darwis. He sat on the sofa holding his phone. Adel was down by his feet. Our son looked good playing.

"Long shopping. Don't know if I'm going. Intentionally, yes," he said.

It hurts, but I won't be hooked. If I open the voice of fear even fight. I know Bang Darwis' character is tough. Can't be fought. It is better to give. Let's just keep the house safe.

I saw Adel playing with a doll. "Adel want some ice cream?" ask me while squatting down and opening the bag.

My son came straight and walked closer. "You, Buk," he said.

Adorable.

"Jajan jajan hold. Maybe that's the reason shopping money is always lacking" said Bang Darwis who made my heart hot. He who gives me a little money.

Three years of marriage I always thank you for a little money. Yes, because there is a motorbike. So it should be able to set aside.

But now there are no installments, then why is it still rationed? Heran I was there. When asked, he was always angry. Exactly earlier.

"It's Al, Bang, who loves it" I explained.

He just snorted. Then stand up and straighten the jacket. But the guts changed. He suddenly grabbed the stomach and then farted.

Adel who heard that just laughed.

"Damn it, why the sudden mules," he said. He went to the kitchen after putting his phone and wallet on the table.

I don't know why I'm suddenly curious about the phone. He kept holding the HP. Not looking at the time. Sometimes again eat hold HP, then smile yourself.

I wonder if I opened the phone. Rada shaking hands because for five years married never even though I fiddled with him.

I just don't know why I'm curious about the contents of his phone right now. One guess is he's playing crazy out there.

I checked one-one. Chat applications, social media and others. But nothing strange. There is no female chat. Then who's he been texting all this time?

Get contact's.

I was suddenly curious about this app. He said this application can tell us what our names in other people's contacts.

Dare to be afraid I peek at Bang Darwis. He's not done yet.

Quickly I checked the application and was shocked, really shocked to the point when I saw one name embedded in the phone who knows.

"My girlfriend is ean."

My tears are falling.

D-he really betrayed? Then, what has he done with the woman to give her the name Bang Darwis my boyfriend ean? Have they ....

My eyes are heating up. The chest feels burnt. Be ill.

I put the phone and took Adel to the house of in-laws. I went back to Aldi's shop.

"Al, is there a mother?" I try to regulate emotions.

"She, Brother."

I entered after greeting. I leave Adel to the mother-in-law who happens to be splitting anchovies again.

After that I returned. The chest was already jerking, the rumbling was incredible. I can't accept being cheated on while he's never been happy. What did he give me that dared to hurt like this? Did he ever give me a diamond diamond?

No, never! All he gave was squalor.

I was at home and saw my husband was very nice again. Face radiant. He whistled too.

"Who is that girl?" my sergeant half-cried.

***

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