Love Without Crown
Marriage Testing (Part I)
Marriage is beautiful, but not everything is beautiful. Need adaptation to everything, from small things to big things, it is not uncommon to initially argue lightly ended secretly. Mami often advises to be patient and reasonable like that at the beginning of marriage because in addition to character adaptation, adaptation to status as husband and wife, trail and error, gradually will be able to formulae to understand each other. There are those who quickly find a formula there are also those who take longer, thankfully the prospective grandmothers do not want to quickly have grandchildren, so if you say you want to quickly have it is just a joke. They are more pressing me to adapt first, after everything is felt to be new please ngoyo want momongan.
Bored at home because after marriage, Zul wanted me at home, he said that I was too much work, after being remembered correctly too, he said, since high school while working because you want to have your own savings. I who used to be busy outside the house need adaptation as well to stay at home, zul just forbid me to work is not another thing, but, in other words, it is still free to do activities outside the home that are important not negative.
Mama and mami told to contract or buy their own house, the household is better to separate from parents or in-laws, except for very urgent reasons. Initially feeling surprised, very hearty, but zul gave the understanding that his mother did not hate but rather wanted us to be independent.
“So parents should teach independence not indulgence, not heart, but mama and mami learn from our household life” Mama said, I know mama has not heart but this must be done.
“So that you are comfortable with each other in everyday life, not jaim-jaiman, if again lazy-malasan do not hesitate” Connect Mami.
“Mertua and mama's parents are good, when mama lives with many in-laws is uncomfortable because it is not good. Sometimes again want to be lazy, but in-laws are busy, must sadardiri help, it is different if at the home of your own parents, surely the bodo’ period if scolded is common.” Mom told me about something she hadn't told me all this time.
“Mami, used to live apart. Really comfortable each other, because it could be willing to be diligent or lazy when friday, if tired yes rest without any bad taste, the point is that the husband goes home all right, if you are tired, then rest without any bad taste, or negotiate and apologize if the house is a mess. But, everything must be independent, including if you run out of food.” Mama told me.
“The salary of your papi used to be small loh zul, when viewed from the nominal it feels not enough to pay the rent, electricity, living expenses, but it turns out that God loves sustenance from anywhere. Your dad said it was important that your mom be comfortable and happy, if
the state of mami so everything that mami do sincerely, including praying for the success of papi.” Connect mami.
I listened to their stories, concluding that marriage is not simple, marriage is self-reliance. Hearing mami tell me about the papi who went from his parents' house because he chose to contract even though the salary was small, this was done for the convenience of mami, papi's parents were opposed because it was better to stay at home and his salary was saved. Mami is willing with papi decisions, even willing if their lives are difficult, including for daily meals.
***
Houses rented with several compartments of space, deliberately choose located in the suburbs so as not to expensive rental costs. One month to be here can prove what mama and mami tell us, we are more free and comfortable, no need to claim each other. I have no problem leaving the big mama's house to live in a few tenements, even I am happy, anyway if you miss home mama can come and stay, even with zul if you miss home mami. I only work freelance, a steady income only from zul, zul salary is not as big as before moving to this city, early move zul was asked to help the business mami but after it felt stable he worked elsewhere, to add management knowledge directly. The city's UMR is not big, so we have to adjust the cost of living.
***
The early days of the marriage were tested with a hefty test making the done, zul family assets had to be sold to pay debts in the name of her mother, which she had to pay, before his stepfather died he used his mother's identity to owe a large amount of money, the family's assets being his guarantee. Existing assets are used to pay bills, including the mom business having to go out of business, I saw for the first time zul crying in front of employees for having to fire them.
“Sorry, this is the only severance we can give” Zul ends with the sentence.
The employees also cried, some were even willing to survive to start again from zero, some also said that they were ready to be called back to work at any time even though the salary was not as big as before. They've been like family, fifteen years isn't a short time to run this business, mami also does not hesitate to give scholarships to their children who are high achievers or strong desire to go to college but do not have tuition fees.
“You do not worry, children who are still in college can continue, I have prepared the funds.” Mami lantang.
“Bu, under these circumstances can still do just that?” Refute an employee.
“Those broke me, their future should be good, I don't want to renege on promises.” Expostulating
mami is steady.
***
I help repayment costs with existing savings, savings money that has not had time to make a house should I relinquish. For me it does not matter the money savings run out, the important debt is paid off immediately, every time I try to strengthen zul and mami, mami house was sold to pay the debt, mami lives with mama. The test is quite heavy, one side must be responsible for things that have never been done, on the other hand must undergo a household ark with all obligations. The situation is crumbling, the economy is ravaged, I deliberately set aside money to pay for the contract for the next three years, the goal is that if it is completely exhausted, at least there is still a roof to shelter.
We diligently pay off the debt and interest, sell all the assets they have to pay off immediately, have 80% repaid, deptcollector who come to mami not rude because they know mami, as well as the owner of the receivables, he said, even apologized for not confirming to mami first because of her trust in the stepfather who had been well known.
“Honey, I'm sorry ya” said zul lirih.
“For what?” Ask surprised.
“Not that I make you happy, it troubles you, sorry that I haven't been able to give you enough material yet,
even your savings are out” Looks guilt on his shady face.
“Honey, I can accept all, we have to strengthen each other. I'm sure all will pass, all will recover. So I thank you for taking care of my mother's request to contract, even though this time is difficult, I am comfortable here, I am free to cry, annoyed, and others” My eyes are staring warmly
her face.
“Betul what spelled mami and mama ya” My Welcome again.
Zul hugged my body tightly, my body is getting thinner than before, understand it has shed 10 kg, instead of zul does not eat, but I just do not enjoy every meal, he said, in my mind how the debt paid off quickly, do additional work for daily expenses, let the unag generated zul to pay the debt
there are.
[Zull.. there is a subpoena from the other party to pay the debt that is due] Mami said on the end of the phone.
“Yes God, what else is this?” He said after ending the call.